The Heart of a Broken Soul
by coffee-ink-fire
Summary: Love is a fickle thing. Filip knows this. He also knows that his guilt for loving a girl ten years his junior is eating away at him. But, really, what can he do, besides gather his guilt in a bottle and lock it away in a box under the bed? Chibs/OC
1. Of Coffee and Mugs

**The Heart of a Broken Soul**

Of Coffee and Mugs

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own SOA, no way, no how. I'm a poor soul, please don't sue. I own my OC's, and the plot, which has been loosely inspired by letmefallalseep's '**Ridin' Through This World, All Alone**'. Read her stories, yay?

Warnings: This is SOA, not MLP. What do you expect? Violence, swearing. Lovin'. Will eventually be a Chibs/OC.

* * *

It was the slamming of the front door that woke Gabby. Not the hushed whispers of Bobby and Clay; not the screaming and bellowing of a man whose voice she didn't recognise. Just the simple slamming of the front door, at three in the morning, that told her not only was Bobby home, but there was someone with them.

"I don't give a shite!" the man was screaming. He didn't sound as angry as he did upset.

Gabby crawled out of bed, inched toward her bedroom door. She opened it an inch, then a bit further so that she could better see.

There was nothing unusual about strangers in the house. Nothing unusual about them being dragged in at all hours of the morning, either. But there was something different about this man. His face was torn between anguish and anger. Two relatively fresh cuts – stretching from his ear to his mouth – were on either side of his face, oozing blood and pus. He had some bruises, a swollen eye, but nothing as bad as the cuts. Clay and Bobby were half-restraining him, half holding him up. He was alive, obviously, but he had the look of someone who was only alive because they had no other choice. Gabby couldn't stop the small gasp that escaped her mouth.

Bobby heard it. His eyes found hers. "Go back to bed, Gabby," he commanded.

"But-"

"I said go!"

Gabby didn't dare disobey him. Lord knows he'd done so much for her over the past few years. The least she could do was listen. Which was exactly what she did. The commotion had died down a bit – they probably didn't want her to hear anything she shouldn't – but they were still talking, still struggling with the man. They took him to the spare room next to Gabby's, so she leaned up against the wall, pressing her ear to it.

"Filip, don't be an idiot. We took you in to take care of you, _not _to plan your funeral!" Bobby hissed. "We need to patch up you face before it gets infected."

There was some movement before Filip snapped, "leave it!"

"It's bad, Filip," Clay told him matter-of-factly. "Real bad."

"I don't give a shite about me face! Just leave me alone!"

It took Gabby a few moments to recognise the accent, but when she had, her curiosity was roused, and she strained to hear more. What was a Scotsman doing in Charming? Gabby knew that samcro had dealing with the Irish – sometimes she heard them talking about it when they thought she was asleep – but this man was Scottish. Had they expanded their business? Were they dealing with _both _the Irish and the Scottish now?

Gabby waited impatiently for them to talk some more, but there were heavy footsteps, the closing of a door, and nothing else was said. Sighing, Gabby slid down to the floor. She knew a fair bit about things she probably shouldn't, but she couldn't help her curiosity.

Her bedroom door creaked open, light spilling in. She panicked for a moment as Bobby's mass blotted out the light a second later. He was going to kill her.

"Hear anything interesting?" he asked.

Gabby dropped her gaze. "No. I was just curious!" It was a pathetic defence, but she could try.

"You're always curious." With a sigh, Bobby walked over and sat himself on Gabby's bed. He patted the space next to him. "Sit." Gabby obliged. "His name's Filip. Guess you know that, though."

"He's Scottish, isn't he?"

Bobby nodded. "He's gunna stay here for a few days, so I need you to look after him; there's a lot going on with the club, and you're still on term break."

"I can do that," Gabby promised, nodded her head furiously. "But..." she hesitated. "He's not... dangerous, is he? I mean, he seemed a bit sad..."

"He won't hurt you. He's gone through a rough time, so he'll probably be like that for a while, but he's a friend."

"Okay. I'll look after him."

Bobby smiled, pulling Gabby into a bone-crushing hug. "You're a good girl, Gab," he told her. "Get some sleep, okay?"

* * *

When Gabby woke, Bobby and Clay were gone. It was just her and Filip. Stretching, she made her way to the kitchen, poured two cups of coffee, more out of habit than anything else. She didn't even know if the Scotsman liked coffee. One was usually for Bobby, but since he was already gone and Gabby didn't want to waste the other, she found herself carrying it to the spare bedroom. She knocked lightly on the door.

No answer.

With a frown, Gabby pushed the door open and peered inside. The Scotsman was still there, still alive, still looking as though he had no choice in the matter. "I, uh, I made you some coffee."

Filip didn't move. "I don't want any fuckin' coffee."

Gabby ignored him, and placed it on the bedside table. She glanced at Filip, who sat there, staring at the carpet as though it was the most interesting thing in the world. His dark eyes were glazed over, and his wounds were still oozing. "I'll get something to clean you up," she told him. He ignored her.

As soon as she stepped out of the room, she heard a yell, an angry "jus' fuck off!" and a smash. Gabby closed her eyes, breathed deeply, and fetched some cotton bus and peroxide. She would _not _let him get to her. She promised Bobby she'd look after him, and that's exactly what she would do.

The mug was in shatters when she re-entered the bedroom. Wordlessly, she skirted around them, kneeling beside the Scotsman. He didn't say anything, so Gabby grabbed a cotton bud, bathed it in the peroxide, and moved to dab it on his face.

Filip's hand shot out and seized her wrist in a bone-crushing hold, startling her. She tried to yank her hand out of his grasp, but he wouldn't let go. "Don' touch it, it's fine," he told her.

Gabby could almost hear her bones cracking as she whimpered in pain. "You're hurting me," she told him as she struggled.

He didn't let go. "I don' need help," he said, releasing her.

They sat there for a minute, neither of them speaking, before Gabby finally moved. She bent over the floor, picking up the shards of mug, one by one, as though nothing had happened. "I'll leave the peroxide and cotton buds," she told him. "And I'll bring in some food later." She could almost hear his internal groan as she left the room, as she cradled the shards of mug in her hands, thinking of how her grandmother would be turning in her grave if she knew that one of her precious, antique mugs had just been shattered by an angry Scotsman.

Filip hadn't touched the peroxide or any of the cotton buds an hour later when Gabby bought in some food and water. It didn't seem as though he'd even moved. She placed the salad and cup on his bedside table and left.

At dinner, it still all remained untouched. With a sigh, Gabby replaced the salad with the roast. "You have to eat," she told him. "Or drink, at the very least."

And, as though she hadn't even spoke, he sat, staring into space, mouth firmly shut in a thin line. Gabby left him there, and went into the kitchen to dispose of the salad. When she'd finished washing the bowl, she heard the familiar roar of a motorbike. The engine cut off, and moment later Bobby strode in, his wild hair made worse by the helmet he'd just taken off.

"Ah, dinner," he mused, sitting himself at the table. Gabby joined him. "How is he?" Bobby jerked his head in the general direction of the rest of the house.

Gabby shrugged. "He'll get there," she said. She toyed around with one of her potatoes, poking and prodding it, a question hanging on the edge of her tongue like someone dangling off a cliff.

"What?" Bobby asked. "You want to ask something."

"Yeah."

"Ask away."

Gabby opened her mouth to speak, but seemed to think better of it. "No, I shouldn't. It's none of my business."

Nodding, Bobby shovelled a forkful of peas into his mouth. "Probably not," he managed before swallowing the food, "but you're gunna ask anyway."

Gabby chuckled. He knew her too well. "What... what happened to him, Bobby?" she asked. "What was so bad that he doesn't even want to live?"

Bobby just nodded. "Yeah," he said, and they fell silent for a while as he lost himself in thought. "It's not really on me to tell you."

"Doesn't matter. Must've been pretty bad, though," Gabby commented.

"It was," Bobby said, cleaning off his plate. He scraped the bones into the bin. "Isn't that one of your grandmother's old mugs?"

"Hmm?" Gabby turned to Bobby, who was staring into the bin, frowning. "Oh, yeah, it is."

"What happened?" Bobby dumped his dishes in the sink.

Gabby hesitated. "I dropped it," she finally said. She waggled her fingers. "Butterfingers. Grams would turn in her grave if she knew."

"Well, I promise not to tell her," Bobby said with a wink. Gabby smiled. "Thanks for lookin' after him."

"It's no problem" Gabby told him.

* * *

The next morning, Gabby made sure to pick a mug with little to no sentimental value as she poured the coffee. Filip hadn't touched his dinner, and he'd barely drunk anything. He'd finally made progress on the cotton buds; Gabby had spent a good five minutes trying to find them all after he'd flung them around the room, and she'd taken the peroxide in fear that he'd drink it while she was sleeping.

She'd barely left the room when she heard the second mug shatter. She didn't pick it up, instead grabbed her bag, told him not to do anything stupid, and left the house. At this rate, they'd have no mugs left by the week's end. _If _the Scotsman lived that long.

Town was never really busy, and today was no exception. She made her way to the parlour, where Lucy was busy sweeping up hair. "Hey Luce," Gabby greeted.

Lucy smiled. "Gabby! I was wondering when you'd be around. Where have you been?"

"Nowhere."

"Evidently. What makes today so special?" Lucy asked.

"I need to buy some things," Gabby told her.

Before Lucy could answer, a harsh voice piped up. "What, parents?" Gabby and Lucy turned to see Jeremy, a boy from their school, sitting on a stool. He wheeled it over, sneering. "I didn't know they had a 'parents'r'us' in Charming."

Gabby dropped her head, falling silent, but Lucy fired up. "Piss off, _Hart!_"

"Watch it, I'm a paying customer," Jeremy retorted. He folded his arms, eying Gabby.

"Good, I'll give you a _real _close shave," Lucy snarled.

Gabby put a hand on Lucy's arm. She really didn't want to start anything. "Don't worry about it," she said, "just leave it."

"No!"

"You best be careful, _Luce; _orphanage is contagious."

"I'll make an orphan out of _you_, useless shit," Lucy snapped. She turned to her mom. "Can I go?" she asked.

Her mother scowled, oblivious to the commotion. "Manners," she warned.

"May I please leave?" Lucy whined. The parlour belonged to her mother, so she was employed by default, but she hated it.

"_One _hour, you hear?"

"Yeah, yeah, okay," Lucy yelled, grabbing Gabby's arm and dragging her out the door. She was much happier once she was outside. "So, what are we shopping for?" she enthused.

"Nothing exciting," Gabby assured her. "Just some tea... oh, and mugs. Ours seem to keep... breaking."

Lucy raised a curious eyebrow, but didn't press the matter. "How are you with all that?" she asked, jerking her head back towards the parlour. "You know, Jeremy and... the rest of the school."

Gabby shrugged. "The same as always," she said. She'd never been one for socialisation, so throughout school, didn't have too many friends. When her parents had died though, the bullying started. How could an orphan afford to go through high school? What business did an orphan have passing any of the classes? Orphans were alone by default, so why did she deserve friends?

After a while, Gabby had learned to block them out, and she'd never told Bobby anything, but sometimes it was hard to cover up the truth when you turned up home covered in cut and bruises. So Gabby passed them off as one-offs. She'd gotten into a fight, said the wrong thing to the wrong person. Whether Bobby believed her or not, he didn't press the matter.

They made their way into the grocery store. "Where would the tea be?" Gabby asked.

"With the coffee," Lucy replied. "Obviously."

"Yeah, I guess. Come on." They made their way to the aisle. It didn't take them too long to find the tea; it seemed to continue on forever, and Gabby stared at it hopelessly. There were more varieties than she thought would ever be possible.

"So... which one?" Lucy asked.

Gabby blinked. There was Earl Grey, Darjeeling tea, breakfast tea, jasmine tea, herbal tea – which came in a thousand different flavours – and then there were another hundred brands on top of that. Infused lemon, berries, cinnamon... the list was endless. "Uh... maybe a breakfast tea," Gabby said.

"Well, there's English, Irish, Scottish, Ontario, Twinings, French, organic, another English..."

"Did you say Scottish?"

Lucy nodded. "Yup." She picked up a box and held it out. "Scottish Breakfast Tea," she enthused.

"Right. I'll go with this one. Now; mugs."

* * *

When Gabby entered Filip's room the next morning, she felt slightly more optimistic than she had the past two. She placed the mug on his bedside table. Filip glanced at it, and Gabby saw the slight raise of his eyebrow. The blue mug sat there innocently, gleaming, as the milky liquid in it steamed, a thin tendril of steam rising into the air.

"It's tea," Gabby informed him. She went to leave, but paused at the door. "Oh, and the mug's plastic, so, do your worst." With that, she left him, without even noticing the small twitch of the corners of his mouth as he fought to keep them from turning into a smile.


	2. Of Cigarettes and Dimples

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Cigarettes and Dimples

* * *

**A/N:**So there's been a few followers and favourites, which is always exciting :) I'm able to get two chapters up today because I'm very not busy, but production will likely slow. Anyhow, here it is; please review :)

* * *

If there was one thing Gabby was good at, it was taking her anger out on rocks. Specifically the larger ones, the ones that were big enough to kick a fair distance, but not so big that if it hit someone's foot, they would turn around and beat the shit out of you, because rocks that large didn't move on their own.

As she kicked her victim down the street, she thought of all the horrible things she would do to Jeremy and his mates if she ever got the chance. She'd skin them alive and carve obscene words into them as they squealed in pain. Or maybe she'd engineer some flesh-eating bugs and inject them with a needle. Oh, the things she would do to them if she could.

Of course, she'd never get the chance, so it was all she could do to keep her mouth shut, and pretend like anger was an emotion that was never installed in her at birth. She rubbed at her wrist, still sore from where Filip had grabbed it. Maybe she'd lump him in with Jeremy. He drank the tea she made for him every morning, and he'd started eating, but he still wouldn't talk, and wouldn't let her touch his wounds. Gabby suspected he'd been cleaning them himself, though, because they didn't look infected.

When she arrived home, the front door was unlocked. Her first thought was that Bobby was home, but he didn't finish work until five, and that was if the club didn't need him. She'd locked it before she'd left for school, told Filip that she'd be gone for the day and not to do anything stupid, because lord knows he was still that poor soul who didn't want to be alive.

Panicking, she bolted inside. "Filip?" she yelled, throwing open the door to his room. It was empty. "Oh, God..."

A search of the house yielded no Scotsman. Gabby tried to figure out where he could have gone. Unless he knew his way around Charming, which she highly doubted, he'd be lost. If he'd travelled left from the house, he would have hit the highway. Another left would take him towards town, but a right would take him away from Charming. Assuming that he'd be trying to get as far away as possible, Gabby shot out of the house, taking a left, and then a right.

She wasn't much of a runner, but when occasion called, well, it called. She gave up running after about half an hour, and instead jogged down the highway, cars zooming past, the drivers probably wondering what on earth could compel a teenage girl to run down a highway towards the middle of nowhere. All she could think about was the look on Bobby's face when he discovered Filip gone. Just gone.

After about an hour, Gabby finally spotted him, walking down the highway, smoke in hand, oblivious to the fact that an exhausted teenager was trailing after him like a scolded puppy. He was almost at a gas station. If he reached it, he would be able to get a lift, or even call someone. Gasping for breath, Gabby quickened her pace, and sprinted to catch up to him. "Filip!" she screamed.

The startled Scotsman almost fell over when he turned around. His eyes widened and his mouth fell open as he stared at Gabby. The cigarette dangled limply from his fingers.

"What... are you... doing, Filip?" Gabby managed as she gasped for breath. She leaned over, placing her hands on her knees to steady herself. "Where are you going?"

Filip just stared. "Did you follow me?" he asked after a pause.

Gabby nodded, unable to speak.

"Jesus..." Filip shook his head in disbelief. "Go home," he told her, before turning and continuing down the highway.

Determined, Gabby rushed after him, grabbing his arm. "Filip, _please_..." she began.

Filip's arm shot out, taking Gabby by surprise, and he smacked her in the stomach, knocking her to the ground. "Wha' do you know!" he screamed.

As shocked tears welled in her eyes, Gabby was aware of harsh laughter. Filip noticed it, too, and they both turned to see Jeremy and his friends staring at Gabby, enjoying the commotion. Of course; he and his buddies were going on a 'road-trip' to celebrate him getting his license. She'd be free of him for a week, but that wasn't long enough for her. As soon as he got back, he'd make her life miserable, and now he had just one more reason. Filip turned back to Gabby as the tears spilled down her cheeks.

"Nothing," she told him. "I don't know anything." And without another word, she got to her feet, gathered the remainder of her dignity, and started off back down the highway.

* * *

It took Gabby about twenty minutes to realise someone was following her. She didn't have the courage to check, but it had to be Jeremy. Now that he'd seen _that _commotion, he'd be dying to get his two cents in before he left for his road-trip. She sped up.

A few minutes later she heard heavy footsteps, and moments after that a cigarette grasping hand came into view. Gabby looked up to see a somewhat guilty looking Filip. "I don't smoke," she told him curtly.

Shrugging, Filip put the smoke to his lips, taking a deep drag. They fell into a silence that was neither comfortable nor uncomfortable, as they walked back. Neither of them spoke, not even when they reached the house and went inside. Filip retreated to his room, and Gabby set about cooking dinner. Even when Bobby got home and asked how Filip was, Gabby just said, "he's fine," and went about mashing the potatoes as though nothing had happened, and she wasn't dreading going to school a week from now.

* * *

Over the course of the next week, Filip's temperament improved, and he began to speak to Gabby, like telling her about that time when he was a medic for five months, and he had to cut someone's leg off because it had gangrene – a result of it not being cleaned for a month.

By the second cup of tea, Filip allowed Gabby to clean the wounds on his face, much to her relief, and she made sure they practically shined so much that gangrene wouldn't dare come near then. By the fourth, he apologized for the bruise on her wrist, and for almost shattering it, and for making her chase after him down a highway in a blind panic, only to have him yell at her.

Filip found his manners the day after, thanking her for her help and the tea, after telling her a story about how his mother used to beat him with a stick every time he forgot his manners; and on the Sunday morning when Gabby was making him his seventh cup of tea, he did something unexpected.

He put a hand on her arm.

While she was in the kitchen.

Outside of his bedroom.

Gabby let out a small scream as she jumped, stumbling into the dining table and almost losing her footing. Filip raised both hands in surrender as she tried to regulate her breathing and her heart. She swallowed. "You scared me," she gasped, still trying to breathe properly.

"Aye, I noticed." Filip watched her carefully, as though expecting her to keel over at any moment.

It was only then, in the _light_ – Filip had refused to open the curtains in his room, telling Gabby that she 'don' need to see it' – that she realised just how attractive he was. She hadn't noticed on the highway because she was too upset with him, but now it stood out like a flower in the desert.

From his dark brooding eyes to his dimples and unshaven goatee, he was good-looking. The scars on his face were beginning to heal. They'd always remain there, but Gabby thought they gave him the appearance of having fuller cheeks, like a baby's. She blushed.

"I was just making drinks," she mumbled, and went back to the counter, busying herself with the drinks while trying to forget that she'd just compared Filip's cheeks to a baby's. "Um... si... sit down." She gestured towards the table. Filip obliged, watching her with poorly hidden interest.

"How old are ye?" he asked, lighting up a smoke.

"Me?" Gabby asked stupidly, even though they were the only two in the room. Filip simply nodded. "Oh. I'm sixteen. How old are _you?_" she retorted.

"I'm Twen'y-seven," Filip told her. "Nothin' special."

Gabby smiled, placing a steaming mug in front of him. Twenty-seven. That was only eleven years difference. Nothing she couldn't handle. "You know, I didn't think you'd ever leave that bedroom again," she admitted.

Filip shrugged. "I wasn' goin' to," he said, taking a sip of tea.

"Then why did you?"

"Because a pretty girl looks that much better in the sunshine."

Gabby blinked, dumbfounded. She could feel her face burning, but she was beyond caring. Had he just called her pretty? She didn't believe her eyes to tell the truth. Filip kept on drinking his tea as though he hadn't just caused Gabby's heart to stop, but she noticed a small smile playing on his lips.

"Mor... ning." Bobby stood in the doorway, as dumbfounded as Gabby, only he didn't take as long to recover. "You finally discovered how a door works, then," he said.

Filip nodded. "Aye. Took me a while, but I got the gist of it."

"That's good, then. You feel up for a ride? Rest of the club wants to say hello."

"You're part of samcro?" Gabby blurted out. They both glanced at her.

"A transfer," Bobby finally told her. "From Ireland," he added, because Gabby didn't look like moving any time soon.

"Aye, so I'll be stickin' round for a while," Filip said. "If that's alrigh' with the two of ye?"

Gabby shrugged nonchalantly. "I don't have a problem with that," she told him.

"You're welcome here as long as you need to be," Bobby told him.

"Thank you."

"Don't mention it. Are you about ready? We may as well head down to the club now."

Filip nodded. "I'm set." He stood, pushing the empty mug from him.

"While we're heading in that direction, do you need a lift to school?" Bobby asked, turning to Gabby.

Her heart dropped. She'd been trying so hard not to think about it, and now she'd just been given a harsh reminder. "No, it's fine," she assured him. Like hell she was using any form of transport that would get her there _earlier_. "Luce is gunna pick me up," she lied.

Bobby nodded his approval. "I like that one. Nice girl. Alright, let's go Filip." Bobby slapped Filip on the shoulder.

"Aye." He nodded his head at Gabby, throwing her a smile, before heading out the door, Bobby in tow.

Gabby sighed. It wouldn't do for her to skip school, though the thought had crossed her mind; she didn't want Bobby barging in, making it worse. She knew he was only trying to help, but the last – and only – time he'd gone in, the bullying had gotten worse. Of course, if any of them knew she was affiliated with the SOA, they wouldn't dare mess with her, but she didn't like to use the club to solve all of her problems. She wasn't an old lady, wasn't even a relative of someone in the club.

Her father had been a member before he'd died, and Gabby and her siblings had been left orphaned. She'd been a relative of a member back then, actually had some standing. Now, she was little more than a charity case.


	3. Of School and Orphans

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of School and Orphans

* * *

**A/N:**Thanks to medousaki and CupKatyCakes for their reviews! This chapter is for you guys :)

* * *

School was always a nightmare, and not just for Gabby. The halls were packed with students who had to elbow their way through the crowd just to reach their lockers. It was so loud it was impossible to hear the person next to you unless they shouted, and even then they would have to repeat themselves at least twice. If there happened to be a commotion in the halls, it made getting to class even worse, because everyone in the vicinity of the commotion stopped to watch, and God forbid you try to walk past.

Couple that with the constant wisecracks from Jeremy, the feigned ignorance of the rest of the school, and Lucy's pitiful smiles, Gabby more often than not found herself wondering why on earth she bothered. What did she expect to get out of high school, apart from a higher education than most of the boys at Teller-Morrow?

"Gabby, come on," Lucy hissed. She glanced around the crowd. "I can't see him, let's go."

They elbowed their way through the mass of students, struggling to reach their classroom. By sheer luck they made it without incident, and the two of them took their seats at the back of the class by the windows. The only reason Gabby sat in the back corner was so she could see everyone, including Jeremy, who strode in like a conquering prince. When he saw Gabby, a wicked grin spread across his face.

He sat down silently, but as soon as one of his friends walked in, he started. "Pretty good week, don't you think?"

"Oh yeah," his mate, Tommy, replied, "booze, weed and pussy." He winked at Stacey, who giggled. She'd joined them on the road-trip, and had evidently had a good time.

"How they got the teachers to believe they'd all come down with the flu, I'll never know," Lucy breathed, loud enough so Gabby could hear.

Gabby shrugged. "Half of them just didn't show up," she replied. "No excuses."

"You say something, Orphan?"

The room fell silent. Gabby wasn't the only person Jeremy enjoyed making miserable, but even those who he didn't ridicule sat quietly in their seats and pretended they were somewhere else, lesy they become his next victim.

"She didn't say anything," Lucy snapped.

"Shut up, bitch. Was I talking to you?" Jeremy turned back to Gabby. "We stopped in at Darcey's before we left. Saw you and your, uh, _boyfriend. _I guess you like 'em old, then. Old and disfigured."

Tommy laughed. "Yeah, can't get anyone else, and they still don't want you."

Gabby couldn't help the angry flush that reddened her cheeks, which caused the two to laugh even harder. Lucy gave her a questioning look, but Gabby just shook her head; she hadn't told her friend anything about Filip.

"You know, my gramps is livin' in the old folks' home down the round. He's pretty much blind, and he's got shit taste; maybe I can set something up. Might finally have some luck," Jeremy managed through his laughter. A few people joined in.

"I've gotta ask though; what's up with those cuts on his face? I mean, he try and do himself in after you cracked onto him, or what?" Tommy asked. He tried to keep the curiosity out of his face.

Gabby didn't say anything; she'd never asked Filip how he'd gotten them, didn't want to be rude. Lucy, sensing her predicament, stepped in. "The cuts are for each man he's killed," she said.

Jeremy sneered. "Tch. That's bullshit; why would he cut his own face?"

Lucy stared him down. "Because he ran out of room on his body."

There were few times Gabby could remember when someone had rendered Jeremy speechless. The first time was before Jax had finished school, and he'd socked Jeremy in the mouth. The second time was the only occasion on which Gabby had tried to stand up for herself; she'd almost gone home in a body-bag. This occasion bought the total up to three.

Satisfied with herself, Lucy turned back to the front of the class, just as their teacher walked in. Mr Harding was a strict man, and no one liked him, but he knew how to control a classroom, and when he called for silence, he got it. Jeremy knew better than to start anything in Mr Harding's class.

"I hope you've all completed your group assignments. The ones that were due a fortnight ago," Mr Harding began, "otherwise you don't leave this classroom until you have."

Lucy turned around to grin at Gabby; they'd finished theirs – an essay comparing the roles of modern women and women from the nineteenth century – weeks ago. It seemed that not everyone else was in the same boat.

"I've given you all plenty of time," Mr Harding continued, "and I've only received 4 completed works. For those of you who haven't finished, I suggest you get a wriggle on. For those who have, we're going to begin reading Macbeth..." There was a collection of groans. "...and _yes, _we will be doing an analysis, so _pay attention_. Now, as you all know, Macbeth was written by..."

Gabby allowed herself to zone out, thinking of how Macbeth was Scottish, and maybe she'd ask Filip his opinion of the play, because _he _was Scottish, too...

* * *

Lucy cleared her throat for what felt to Gabby like the thousandth time. Gabby was obviously missing something, because Lucy sighed and said, "so, who is he?"

"Who?" Gabby asked. She scowled as the blade of grass she was trying to knot frayed and broke.

"What do you mean 'who'? Who's 'the guy'?" Lucy pressed. "The one they were talking about," she added.

"No one, really," Gabby said. "He's staying with us for a while, because he doesn't have anywhere else to go. He came from Ireland, which is where he got the scars, and something else must have happened, because he's a pretty sad guy."

Lucy considered this for a while. "So, he's Irish?"

"No; he's Scottish."

"What, like kilts and bagpipes? He doesn't parade around in a _skirt_ does he?" They both laughed at this, as Gabby tried to imagine Filip wearing a skirt.

"That's a horrible thought," Gabby admitted.

"Do you like him?" Lucy asked.

Gabby shook her head. "No," she lied. It was pointless lying to Lucy, because they'd known each other too long for that, and she'd just call her bluff.

"You liar!" Lucy shrieked.

"Yeah, I guess," Gabby said. "It doesn't matter anyway; he's twenty-seven. And, really; me? Of all people?" She motioned to herself, as though that was enough to qualm all misconceptions about her and Filip.

Lucy just gave her a knowing smile. "What's wrong with you? You're cute. Which brings us back to your Scottish heartthrob. I want to know everything, down to the last freckle."

"Uh, brown hair, brown eyes. Short beard thing. You know, the ones that go around here..." Gabby drew a circle around her mouth with her fingers. "...and then there's the scars that go up here..." she made more motions as she blushed, remembering his baby cheeks.

Lucy noticed. "You're blushing," she teased. "You. Are. Blushing."

"No I'm not."

"You are! You like him!"

"So?"

"Yeah, you're right. But I want to meet him." Lucy glanced around them. Lunch was just about over, with most students already heading to class. "Let's go, before Jeremy finds us," she finally said, getting to her feet.

Gabby stood, too. "He'll find me eventually."

"He's a dick; his mother should have gotten an abortion."

Gabby snorted. "Or drowned him at birth," she offered.

"Nah, wouldn't work. They reckon the first time a mother holds their baby, they just, like, fall in love. Even if that baby looks like pig's ass." Lucy sighed dreamily. "I want a baby," she decided.

"What, now?"

"Now's a good a time as any," Lucy told her, shrugging.

Gabby blinked. "Luce; you're sixteen," she said.

"So? I'm ready for kids."

"No, you're not," Gabby assured her. She slung her bag over her back as they braved the hallways. "I mean, you can't just go up to some guy and say 'hey, I want a baby'."

Lucy considered this for a moment. "Sure I can."

Gabby laughed. "I wish you luck with that," she said.

"Oh, why thank you."

* * *

Gabby headed over to Teller-Morrow when she'd finished school. She hadn't been there in a while, and she missed talking to Tig and Piney. Jax and Opie would probably be there, too. It had been ages since she'd talked to either of them.

The shop was pretty much dead when she got there; there was only one car in the garage, and it looked to have already been fixed. Considering Tig was leaning against it with a smoke in hand, she figured so. There was no one else around. "Well, look what the cat dragged in," he said when he spotted her. "What, you forget where this place is? Haven't been 'round in ages."

Gabby rolled her eyes. "It's nice to see you, too."

Tig just grinned. "Bobby told us you been lookin' after Chibs. Done a good job of it."

"Chibs?"

"Yeah, the Scotsman." Tig jerked his head, and Gabby turned to see Chibs, smoke in hand, talking to Clay.

"You mean Filip?"

Tig took a final drag of his smoke before butting it out on the wheel of the car. "Yeah. Filip, Chibs, same thing. It's like, Scottish for somethin', you know? I don't care. Clay said he was Chibs, so that's what he is."

"Oh... fair enough, I guess." Gabby watched Filip as he talked to Clay. She noticed, perhaps slightly subconsciously, that he didn't smile, not even when Clay burst into laughter, clapping the Scotsman on the back as though he'd just said a hilarious joke. Gabby felt sad for him, even though she didn't know what had happened.

"Gabby!"

Tig's voice bought Gabby crashing back to reality. "Hmm? Sorry, I didn't hear you."

"I asked how school was goin'. Bobby said you still ain't very happy."

"Oh... It's fine," Gabby assured him.

"Uh huh..." Tig didn't really believe her, but he didn't press the matter. "And when you finish?" he asked. "Gunna go to college?"

Gabby scoffed. "No. Even if I could get in, I don't really want to go."

Tig leaned over the car engine, fiddling with this and that. "Why are you still doin' high school, then?"

"For the satisfaction of knowing I got a higher education than you."

"You little shit," Tig said, laughing.

"Where is everyone?" Gabby asked. She picked up a car part, fiddling around with it.

Tig shrugged. "Don't know, don't care. Well, I know Piney ain't here; he left a while ago. And I think Ope's tryin' to woo himself some pussy."

Gabby frowned. "That's... really great."

"Oh, yeah. It's wonderful. Guy's pretty much whipped. He's gunna be married with kids by the end of the week. I know how it works, I have firsthand experience with this shit."

"Tig! We're at the table!"

"That's me," Tig said. He gave Gabby a hug. "I'll talk to ya later, darlin'." He followed after Clay. Gabby noticed that Filip had gone in, too.

With a sigh, Gabby started off home. Every guy she'd known ended up in the SOA. She didn't have much of a problem with the club, so much as she did the fact that they did dangerous things. Her father had died for the club, along with her mother. She didn't fancy the thought of everyone else dying for it, too.


	4. Of Itches and Shakespeare

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Itches and Shakespeare

* * *

**A/N:**Thank you to all my wonderful reviewers! Venetiangrl92, medousaki, Dahlia Rose-Marie, CupKatyCakes. You guys are awesome!

Also, I know not much is happenning yet, but it will; promise!

* * *

She was a pain in arse, Filip thought, as he watched Gabby from the corner of his eyes, reading a copy of Macbeth as though it was the most interesting thing in the entire world. Filip hated Macbeth, or anything else that Shakespeare had written, for that matter. It was just a much a pain as she was.

It had taken him a while to figure out just what kind of pain Gabby was, and when he did, he'd been embarrassed to admit to himself he'd even thought of it.

Gabby was like an itch. The kind of itch you didn't want to scratch, because you knew it would feel good at the time, but then it would go away, and probably wouldn't come back. That's what Gabby was.

Fillip wondered what she would do if she ever found out he'd compared her to an itch. She'd probably feel as stupid as he did just thinking about it.

"Um... Filip? Can I ask you something?"

There it was again. That God-damned itch. Filip took a long drag of his cigarette. "Wha'?"

Gabby seemed torn between to selves, one of them wanting to ask the question, and the other knowing better. The first self won. "Have you ever read Macbeth?"

"I fuckin' hated it."

"Oh..." Gabby opened her mouth to say something else, but thought better of it, and went back to her reading.

He did feel bad for the girl. She was nice, caring, and only wanted to help. She just... wasn't Fiona. Filip let out a heavy sigh as the face of his wife and wee babe appeared in front of him. It was all he could do to stop tears from forming.

Both of them were lost to him, all due to jealousy.

Jealousy was an ugly thing, he thought. Ugly and spiteful. And yet, he couldn't stop the jealousy that welled inside him every time Gabby smiled, because lord knows she wasn't happy, but there was still something inside her that compelled her to smile. It still bothered him, those boys who'd laughed at her when he'd accidentally pushed her to the ground those couple of weeks back. Who were _they_ to be laughing at her?

"Why are ye reading that shite?" he asked after a while.

Gabby looked up. "Hmm? Oh, it's our next assignment. Mr Harding wants us to have it finished by next week, so we can start our analysis."

"Assignment? It's a form of torture. No one would willingly force someone else to read that bollocks unless they were sadist pricks."

Gabby smiled. Filip watched the corners of her lips as they curved upwards into a full smile. He wondered if his lips would ever do that again. "Well, Mr Harding is pretty sadistic," she offered. When she noticed Filip staring, she blushed, dropping her gaze.

Fillip had to remind himself that she was only sixteen, and that he was a married miserable sod with two ugly scars running down either side of his face, and she was a beautiful _girl_. Not woman, because she was only sixteen. He sighed. There was something seriously wrong with him.

"Wha's the analysis bit?" he found himself asking, because it was either talk to her, or mourn lost his lost wife and daughter. He missed them, more than he thought was possible. And he missed Ireland, with its shitty weather and... and shitty weather.

"Oh, I don't know," Gabby told him. "We don't find out until next week. That's why we have to finish the book before then."

"No shite," Filip muttered. He butted his smoke out, and stood to leave, the conversation over.

"What does 'Chibs' mean?" Gabby blurted out.

Itch. Fucking itch.

"Tig said they call you Chibs at the club, and that it's Scottish for something," she explained.

"Aye, it's Scottish," Filip confirmed. "It means, like, knife, or scar." He motioned to the healing scars on the sides of his face, even though the nickname didn't need further explanation.

Gabby considered it for a moment. "That's pretty cool, I guess," she decided. "I don't really have a nickname."

It'd be itchy, Filip thought. An itch in my arse. "Wha's Gabby short for?" he asked.

"Gabriella," she replied with a disgusted look. "I hate _both _of the names."

"Well, kid, can't have everything."

* * *

The next day at school passed without incident. Jeremy was – curiously – keeping his distance. "It's because he thinks your Scotsman will kill him if he says anything," Lucy assured Gabby as they walked into town.

"Yeah, sure, thanks to you," Gabby replied. "He's not my Scotsman, anyway."

"Yet. How much of Macbeth have you read?" Lucy asked. "I managed, like, _one _page before I gave up."

"I rather enjoyed it..." Gabby replied. It seemed she was alone in that feeling.

"'Enjoyed'?"

Gabby shrugged self-consciously. "I finished it this morning..." she admitted.

"Wow. Just... wow. I've never met someone who reads as fast as you do. It's crazy, seriously. You're like, a word freak, or something."

Gabby scowled. "Gee, thanks."

"You're welcome."

When they reached town, they headed straight for the diner, where Lucy's older sister worked as a waitress. Jocelyn was wiping down a table when they arrived. "I'll have a large thickshake, vanilla. Pronto," Lucy demanded, clapping her hands.

Jocelyn glared. "Adopted, I swear. Hey Gab."

"Hi," Gabby greeted, sliding into one of the booths.

"What can I do ya for?"

"Um... a milkshake, please? Banana?"

"One milkshake, coming right up," Jocelyn said, with a cold stare at Lucy.

"Hey! Don't forget my thickshake!" Lucy hollered. "What an ungrateful sister."

"Which one?" Gabby asked.

Lucy scowled. "Don't you start." She grabbed a napkin and started ripping it to pieces. "Did you hear about Jessica?"

"No. Should I have?" Gabby asked. Jessica and her had never really been friends. They'd talked before, greeted each other on the occasion, but that was as far as their relationship went.

"She got into an argument with Jeremy in Spanish. Got beat up behind the bleachers at lunch."

"Oh my God. Is she okay?"

Lucy nodded. She and Jessica were fairly close. "She wouldn't say who it was, but I'm not stupid. It had to have been Jeremy. Broken nose, split lip. Her mom took her up to hospital, but she's alright."

Gabby shook her head in disbelief. Jeremy had always had a violent streak; she knew as much from firsthand experience; but he was never so violent that she'd had to go to hospital before. Not to her, not to anyone. He was too smart for that.

"What were they arguing about?" Gabby asked. She hoped she wasn't next on his list of people to send to hospital. Bobby and the rest of the boys would freak out.

"You know Jessica had, like, a _major _crush on him, right?"

"Yeah?"

Before Lucy could reply, Jocelyn came over with their drinks. "One banana milkshake," she said, placing one of the glasses in front of Gabby. She all but dropped the other on Lucy. "And a shit flavoured sludge-pile. Enjoy!" she chirped, leaving them alone.

Gabby took a sip of hers. It was delicious, as per usual. Jocelyn always made her milkshakes so that they had just the right amount of flavouring in them. "So..?" she pressed.

"Well, apparently they were sort-of dating. You know, _secretly._ But Jeremy cheated on her with this other girl. That's what the argument was about. Anyway, this other girl didn't know about Jess, but after the argument, obviously she found out; broke up with Jeremy. He was _pissed_."

"Obviously."

Lucy nodded, sucking on her straw. "That's why he got stuck into Jess," she finished. Her gaze wandered lazily outside. Suddenly, she froze, and her eyes widened. "Oh, hello," she gushed.

Gabby followed her gaze. A young man, maybe two or three years older than them, was walking toward the diner, oblivious to Lucy's open stare. His blonde hair was sticking up at all angles, as though he'd just gotten out of bed after a rough night.

Instead of entering the diner, however, he walked straight past, much to Lucy's disappointment. "One moment," she promised, before shooting out after him.

Gabby sat patiently, wondering what Lucy was saying to the poor boy, while not really wanting to know. She finished off her milkshake, stabbing at the froth in the bottom as she waited.

Lucy reappeared moments later, grinning. She waved a piece of paper and winked. "Got his number," she sang.

Gabby's face fell flat. "What did you do to the poor boy?"

"I seduced him. His name's Cole. Cute, isn't he?"

"Yeah," Gabby agreed, shaking her head. If only it was that easy for her.

* * *

Gabby had left Lucy at the diner after it became apparent that she'd already arranged a time and place for her date. She didn't particularly want to see any of that. The kissing, the flirting. Gabby shook her head. She probably would have done well with a few lessons in 'seducing men for dummies' though...

The familiar roar of a motorbike reached her ears, and she turned to see Jax and Opie zooming toward her. When they spotted her, they slowed down. "Need a lift?" Jax yelled over the roar of his bike. Opie held a hand up in greeting.

"I wouldn't want to put you out of your way," Gabby told him.

"Ah, we're goin' that way anyhow," Jax told her with a shrug.

Gabby raised an eyebrow. "You don't even know where I'm going."

Jax just grinned, unclipping his helmet. He patted the empty seat behind him, holding out the helmet. Gabby scoffed, but grabbed the helmet and jumped on anyway. When she was properly on, and actually holding on, Jax took off, Opie in tow.

Gabby would never understand why bikes were so popular. Sure, she loved the feeling of the wind in her hair, and maybe it was just her, but every time she rode one, it felt as though she couldn't breathe, with the air whooshing past her so fast that she couldn't catch a breath. There was probably a secret technique to it that everyone had forgotten to teach Gabby.

Jax dropped her off at her house. "Thanks," she told him.

"No problem."

"Tell the old man we've got a meet tonight," Opie said.

Gabby nodded. "Okay, I will. See you later." She waved them off. Bobby was sitting at the table, drinking, when she got inside. "Opie says you've got a meet tonight."

He groaned in response.

"Where's Filip?" Gabby asked.

"Chibs? He's in his room," Bobby informed her.

Gabby still found it strange that they called him Chibs. It just made her think of babies, and their chubby cheeks, and Filip's cheeks, and Filip. She figured it best to leave him be. He didn't spend as much time in his room anymore, but he was still in there a fair bit, like an angsty teenager.

"I'll start dinner," she announced.

Bobby waved her down. "Ah, don't worry about it," he said, pulling out his wallet. "Me and Chibs'll be at the club anyway." He handed Gabby some notes. "Buy some takeout or something."

Gabby took the notes. "Thanks." She thrust them in her pocket, already trying to decide what she would buy. Pizza? Maybe some Chinese. She only rarely had takeaway, even when Bobby _wasn't _home; she usually put his dinner in the oven until he got back.

She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't notice Filip until she collided into him. "Oh!" she exclaimed. "I'm sorry, I didn't see you..."

"Aye, I noticed," Filip replied.

Gabby was suddenly aware of just how close they were. She could distinctly see how much taller than her he was. She could see the cuts on his face, scabbed over as they slowly healed. His lips, thin and soft... What did they really feel like? She wondered, as she resisted the temptation to just... touch them.

She could feel the heat creeping into her cheeks. "Have... have fun at the meet," she told him, before slipping into the bathroom. She waited until she heard footsteps before she allowed herself to relax. He's an adult, she reminded herself. An adult.

Even though she knew that, she still couldn't help thinking that, when it _really _came down to it, age was just a number.


	5. Of Jobs and Lockers

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Jobs and Lockers

* * *

**A/N:**As always, thank you my lovely reviewers: medousaki, Venetiangrl92, Dahlia Rose-Marie, you guys are awesome! And everyone else reading!

This will be the last update for a couple of days (I'll be lacking Internet), so I apologize for that... Enjoy, though!

* * *

"I've been meaning to ask for a while now, but I guess I just never got around to it."

Gabby glanced up from the TV. "Hmm?" If Bobby'd just said something, it had fallen on completely deaf ears.

"I said, 'are ya lookin' for a job yet'?" he patiently repeated.

Gabby considered lying, and saying that she _had _started looking. He wouldn't fall for it, though. "Well... no. Not yet. I figured I'd wait until I finish school."

Bobby nodded. "I understand."

"But..?" Gabby asked. There was obviously more to the conversation. There was never not more when it came to Bobby.

"Well, I just thought now might be a good time to look into it. You can work _and _go to school. There's that diner you always go to, or even the hair salon where Lucy works," Bobby said. "I just don't want you to finish school and have nowhere to go."

"Do you plan on kicking me out, Bobby?" Gabby asked.

He scowled. "If I kicked you out, I'd have to make my own cookies, my own banana bread, and my own dinner. Lord knows I can't cook."

Gabby smiled. Bobby _couldn't _cook, at all. He couldn't even make coffee properly. When he'd taken Gabby in, it had probably been one of the best things he'd done. She cooked and cleaned, and in return he'd paid for her school fees. It worked out well for the both of them.

After her parent's deaths, Gabby didn't have anywhere to go; her mother had been an only child, and her parents had died; her father's side of the family had wanted nothing to do with any of them since he'd joined the club. Her brother and sister had been young enough that her aunt thought she'd be able to save them from the 'bikie life', but she figured that Gabby was too far gone, and gladly signed her over to Bobby's care.

"I'll ask Jocelyn," she promised. "I'll drag Luce down there after school today. I'm sure they can use an extra hand."

"There's no hurry," Bobby told her, "I just thought I'd mention it."

Gabby stood up, stretching. "It's alright. May as well ask. I'm off now." She grabbed her bag and headed out the door.

"Alright, have a nice day," Bobby hollered to her retreating back.

It took Gabby the better part of an hour to walk to school, but she preferred that to being dropped off by Bobby. It wasn't that she was embarrassed by him, so much that she didn't want people to know she was living with a member of the SOA. Affiliations with bike clubs can have interesting effects on people.

Lucy wasn't at school when Gabby arrived. She was earlier than usual, and the halls, for once, were basically empty. Gabby went and put her books in her locker. As she was shoving her bag in, a sound caught her attention.

Jeremy and Jessica, her face swollen and various shades of purple, were having a heated discussion at the end of the hall. Gabby watched curiously for a while as Jeremy's hands flew all over the place as he spoke. She saw his eyes move ever so slightly toward her, and she quickly dropped her head.

Her heartbeat quickened as moments later she heard deliberately slow footsteps. "See something interesting?" Jeremy asked.

Gabby shook her head. "I didn't see anything," she mumbled, as she rushed to close her locker.

She heard it more than she felt it, as a fist grabbed a handful of her hair and slammed her head into the locker. She heard a few gasps from other students, but no one tried to help.

Jeremy yanked backwards, throwing her onto the ground. She landed painfully as she put a hand to her forehead. Blood gushed out of a gaping wound, flowing into her eye and down her face as she hyperventilated. The blood mixed with tears as she sat there, whimpering.

Jeremy towered over her, tall and menacing. "That's right; you didn't see any-fucking-thing," he said to any would-be witnesses. He knelt beside Gabby. "The next time you look at me, I'll gouge your eyes out," he promised, he worked up a mouthful of saliva and spat on her face. "Ugly bitch." He stood up and strode off as though nothing had happened, leaving a bawling Gabby sitting in the middle of the hall.

It wasn't until he was completely out of sight did anyone start talking, their hushed voices echoing around Gabby as she hauled herself to her feet, only to fall back over again, disoriented. Her eyes were unfocused as the world seemed to swim around her, and she was vaguely aware of someone saying the word 'concussion' and someone else suggesting someone help her.

Someone finally rushed over to help, whether due to guilt or something else she didn't know. They pulled her off the ground, onto shaky legs and guided her to the nurse's office.

Gabby didn't remember much after that, but she remembered the hospital and the angry look on Bobby's face when he saw her. She didn't know why he was angry at her, but Filip was there, too, asking what the hell happened. And then there was Jax, Opie and Tig, and Gemma and Clay. Piney didn't show up until after she'd woken up the first time, because someone forgot to tell him that she was in hospital. Lucy managed to fight through everyone to reach her bedside, but she glanced nervously around, unsure.

When Gabby properly woke up, she knew she was alright, because her head was pounding, and Bobby was laughing at something that Lucy had just said. Filip stood quietly in the corner. Everyone else had left.

Gabby groaned, alerting them that she was awake. Lucy was the first to speak. "Oh, my God, are you okay? Jessica said they'd taken you to hospital because you were bleeding and you fainted but she didn't say what happenedandIwassoworriedbeca usenoonewouldtellme..."

"I'm okay," Gabby told her as she slowly sat up.

"What happened?" Bobby asked.

Lucy cut in before she could speak. "It was Jeremy, wasn't it?"

"Who's Jeremy?"

"It's not that little shitehead that was at the gas station?"

"Gas station? What are you talking about?"

"...told me that he was at school early because..."

"...knew that prick would be trouble..."

"...better tell me what the hell is going on before I go down to that school myself..."

"...and he was being unusually good..."

"...don't care if he's underage..."

"...but I can't believe he did this, Gab..."

"Hey!"

Lucy and Filip fell silent as Bobby tuned to Gabby. "What. Happened?" he asked.

"I... I can't remember," she lied.

"Right, well I'm going down to the school..."

"Please don't," Gabby begged.

"...they said there's no danger, and you're right to go when you're up to it, so when you are up to it, Chibs can take you home."

Filip blinked. This was obviously news to him, but he just nodded. Gabby noticed that he was wearing a cut. If he was transferred, he would have already owned one, but this was the first time she'd saw him wearing one.

"Good." Bobby made to leave.

"You should probably take Luce home," Gabby piped up, as though it was fair trade for him going to the school.

Lucy shook her head. "Mom knows I'm here, so it's fine."

"I'll be going soon," Gabby told her, "so you may as well get a lift. I'm fine, really."

Lucy sighed, glancing up at Bobby who shrugged, indifferent. "Yeah, okay. Will you be at school tomorrow?"

No, Gabby thought. I'm never going back again. "Yeah, of course."

"I'll see you then."

Gabby smiled as Bobby and Lucy left. Bobby was going to tear the principal a new one, who in turn would interrogate her for a solid hour or so. It was going to be complete torture.

"You _do _remember wha' happened, don't ye?" Filip asked when they were gone.

"I said I don't, so I don't." Gabby picked at a thread in her shirt.

"Was it that shite at that gas station?"

Gabby was surprised Filip even remembered. She was surprised he even cared. She went to say 'no', but the word caught in her throat As her heart skipped a beat. "It doesn't matter."

"That's as good a yes as any."

Gabby scoffed. "Like I said, it doesn't matter. Teachers won't do anything besides make it worse. No one cares, as long as it's you and not them."

"Wha's he got against you?"

Throwing her legs off the side of the bed, Gabby sighed. She didn't want to talk about it. "Can we go?"

"Not until ye answer my question," Filip told her.

"He's jealous," she told him sarcastically, "because I don't have parents, and he does."

Filip blinked, not completely comprehending what she meant. "He... what?"

"Can we go now?" she repeated.

Filip sighed, defeated. "Aye, sure. Come on."

* * *

As they headed home, Filip wondered what on earth would compel someone to tease another because their parents were dead. It had taken him a few moments to understand what Gabby had said, but when he had, it just pissed him off.

Her parents were dead. Both of them. And she had no other family. Filip failed to see the funny side of that. He tried to see it, but he couldn't. It was lost on him. Death wasn't funny, just like stealing someone's family wasn't. He could, to a degree, understand the pain she would have felt, only he actually had a chance of seeing his wife and child again. Gabby didn't.

The more he thought about, the angrier it made him. That shit, that little shit, had it in for him. Filip knew what the boy looked like, and after all Gabby had done for him, the least he could do was find the little shithead, rough him up enough so that he left her alone. He could practically feel the terror radiating off of her when he asked about the kid. It was logical enough for him to go rough the kid up, and had nothing to do with his growing attraction to her. Nothing at all

* * *

How's that for a nice kinda cliffhanger? :D sorry this is a short one, but there ya go :P


	6. Of Children and Adults

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Children and Adults

* * *

**A/N:**Thank you to Venetiangrl92 and Averys1 for their reviews!

* * *

"So, you mean to tell me that no one knows, like, _anything_?" Tig asked. He scratched the back of his head thoughtfully, as though he'd just been told something in another language.

"That's what they said. And Gabby still says she can't remember anything," Bobby told him. "Her friend seems to think she knows who it was, though. Some shithead called Jeremy."

Jax scoffed, his eyes darkening. "Yeah, I know him. Used to be in my year."

"Used to be?" Tig crossed his arms. "What happened?"

"He's as thick as you, Tig, that's what happened."

They all laughed.

"I'll kill him," Bobby growled.

"Get in line," Tig told him.

Chibs sat, only half-listening, thinking with some satisfaction that he at least knew what the kid looked like. Unfortunately, he was just that; a kid, and the last thing samcro needed were allegations of child abuse. He'd calmed down since last night, but he was still pissed, and Gabby still wasn't herself. She'd even gone as far to pretend she had a splitting headache, to get out of school. Bobby had believed her, and let her stay home, but Chibs had seen the look of sheer relief in her eyes when the older man had fallen for it.

Taking a drag of his cigarette, he threw it to the ground, butting it out. "Ye boys still need me?" he asked. They all turned to him. "Gotta get some more smokes," he lied.

Clay waved him off. "Ah, you're right, Chibs. Nothing left to do anyway. May as well go home afterwards."

With a nod, Chibs said his goodbyes, mounted his bike – his old club had kindly salvaged it, and shipped it over – and took off. When he was well out of sight, he pulled over to change around his attire, making sure his cut was well hidden by his hoodie. He then took off toward the school.

The day was almost over when he got there, so he only had to wait a few minutes before kids started flowing out. It took him a while to spot Jeremy, the kid looking smug as he got into his car. Chibs trailed after him, through the town, for a quick stop at a corner store where the kid, the fucking kid, bought a packet of smokes, and into the suburbs. He pulled the car over on the side of the road, Chibs pulling over behind him.

Before Jeremy could do anything, Chibs rushed him, kicking one of his legs out and seizing his arm. Jeremy yelled in surprise as he stumbled, Chibs feeling around in his pockets, pulling out his wallet. He glanced at the I.D.

"What is this shite?"

"It's my goddamn I.D., what the fuck does it look like!" Jeremy screamed.

Chibs glanced at it again. "It's fuckin' fake!"

"It's not fake! It's real, man! Jesus Christ." Jeremy struggled in Chibs' grasp.

"So ye're 18, then?" Chibs asked.

"Yes!"

Chibs grinned wickedly. "And ye're goin' round beatin' up 16 year old girls," he snarled. "You know what that is? That's child abuse. Be a shame if that information found its way to the law." He punched Jeremy in the mouth, who let out a yell. "And ye know wha' _that _was? _Not _child abuse."

He pulled Jeremy to his feet, bringing a knee up into his stomach, before throwing another fist. Jeremy tried to swing back, but Chibs caught his wrist, twisting it back until he heard a faint crack, and Jeremy screamed.

Grabbing Jeremy by the collar, Chibs slammed him into the car. Jeremy's eyes were wide and terrified. "Ye know wha' a Glasgow smile is, boy?" Chibs asked.

Jeremy shook his head, trying to struggle out of Chibs' grip. Chibs pulled a knife. "It's where I cut you from ear," he lightly dragged the knife across Jeremy's face, "to mouth. _Both _sides. If you ever lay a hand on anyone again, I'll find you. And you'd better be afraid when I do."

He let Jeremy go, and the boy collapsed to the ground, sobbing despite his best efforts.

"Ye got it?"

Jeremy nodded. With a scowl, Chibs gave him another boot in the stomach. "Didn't hear ye."

"I... I got it!"

"Good," Chibs spat. "I don't wanna see you again."

* * *

After worming her way out of one day of school, Gabby thought better of trying for a second day. Bobby would definitely suspect something, and there was only so long she could avoid the principal. Mrs Sutton would find her, one way or another. The woman, though doing a terrible job of stopping it, boasted that she fought the bullies and kept a peaceful campus.

She'd said goodbye to Bobby and Filip, and headed off with a heavy heart. When she reached school, Lucy was waiting for her, with a poorly hidden smile. "Oh, you're gunna love it," she exclaimed.

Gabby raised an eyebrow. She doubted there was anything that would make her feel better. All she could think about was Jeremy's threat. She didn't fancy the thought of having her eyes gouged out.

"How are you feeling?" Lucy asked. Gabby gave her a look. "Well, never mind that. Look." She pointed a finger.

Gabby looked. Jeremy was hovering by his car. She stomach dropped as he glanced at her, but as he did, she saw the bruises on his face, the cast on his arm, and the way he grasped his stomach, a pained expression. He dropped his gaze, turning his back to her.

"Oh, wow," Gabby said. She tried not to smile, the same way Lucy was trying, but she was having a hard time of it. "What happened to him?"

Lucy shrugged. "Guess he finally got what he deserved. But he didn't know who did it. Apparently all he could remember about them was they had an accent."

"An accent?" Gabby's face fell into a scowl. "What _kind _of an accent?"

"Didn't say." Lucy noticed the look on Gabby's face. "Oh, God; you don't think it was your Scotsman, do you?"

"No," Gabby lied, "no, he wouldn't do that. He's not the violent type." Another lie. If he was part of samcro, he most likely had some sort of underlying violent tendencies.

Lucy didn't believe her. "But he's in the club. I saw him at the hospital, wearing a cut."

"And?" Gabby asked as they walked inside. "Hey, how did your date go?"

"Don't try to change the subject," Lucy protested.

Gabby raised an eyebrow.

"It went great. Like, _really _great," she gushed, obviously glad to finally tell Gabby. "He was sweet and funny, and he dropped me off home and we're going out again!"

"Did he kiss you?" Gabby asked, genuinely curious.

Lucy just grinned.

"Well, at least you-"

"Gabriella! Can I speak to you?" Mrs Sutton was standing by the doorway to her office. The look on her face told Gabby there was no room for debate.

"Yeah, sure," Gabby replied. She followed the principal into the office, taking the seat opposite hers.

Mrs Sutton didn't say anything for a few minutes, just studied Gabby's face, her eyes straying over the bandaged wound on her head. "You wanna tell me what happened?"

Gabby shrugged. Jeremy's threat loomed over her like a poisonous cloud. "I don't remember."

"Gabri-"

"Doctors said it might happen."

"I see. You know, Gabriella, the funny thing is Jessica said she found you in the hall, by your locker, but no one seems to have seen anything," Mrs Sutton told her. She crossed her arms.

"Because no one did see anything?" Gabby suggested.

Mrs Sutton chuckled. "So, you mean to tell me that there was _no one _in that hallway besides you and whoever did that, am I right?"

"I guess so."

"I can't help you, Gabriella, unless you help me," Mrs Sutton told her with a sigh. "I talked to your father the other day, and I promised him I would help you."

Gabby scowled. "My father's dead," she spat. "Can I go?"

Not to be put off, Mrs Sutton ploughed on, as though she hadn't just said anything to upset Gabby. "I know you remember who it was. We'll punish them, Gabriella. We'll get the police in here if we have to; they won't hurt you again. And we wouldn't want anyone else to get hurt."

"I'll let you know as soon as I remember," Gabby promised. Before Mrs Sutton could say anything else, she stood up and bolted out of the office.

Class had started, so the halls were empty. It was a shame, though, because as Gabby turned the corner she ran straight into Jeremy. She stumbled back, scared.

"What?" he snapped.

Gabby inched back. "I didn't say anything," she stuttered, "I swear."

"So? Get out of my face."

Gabby took off before he could change his mind. Jeremy must have been pretty shaken to have not insulted her, and it was basically impossible to shake Jeremy up.

* * *

Filip was watching some black and white movie when Gabby got home. Bobby was nowhere in sight.

"Where's Bobby?" Gabby asked, pouring herself a glass of water.

"Out," was all Filip said.

"Out where?"

Filip shrugged.

Gabby went and sat in the chair next to Filip. She ran a finger around the brim of her glass. "I ran into Jeremy today," she said.

Filip's eyes detached themself from the TV and came to rest on her.

"He was pretty beat up. Didn't say anything to me." Gabby watched Filip closely, for any change. He was motionless. "It was you, wasn't it?"

The silence that followed felt to Gabby like one of the longest in her life. Filip scratched at his healing wounds, sighing.

"No," he finally said. He stood up and went to leave the room.

"He's underage," Gabby told him. She placed the glass on the coffee table and rushed after Filip, catching him by the arm. "Filip!"

Filip turned to face her. "He's 18," he replied.

Gabby blinked. "I'm afraid to ask."

When Filip grinned at her, she became aware of just how close they were. She could see each of his teeth, could feel his breath on her face and smell nicotine on his clothes. His eyes, she noticed, were more than just 'brown'; they had flecks of a lighter colour in them, and flecks of something darker.

_He's twenty-seven, _she told herself. _No. No you cannot._

Gabby didn't really know how it happened. It was as though a gust of wind had blown her forward, or an invisible strand of string pulled on her upper half, or maybe she'd done it on purpose.

She leaned forward, forgetting everything, and kissed him.

Just for a moment. A second. Less than a second.

When she stepped back, she was speechless. And so was Filip. He stared at her in shock, and she stared back.

She blushed. "I... It was... I didn't..."

Any explanation Gabby had prepared was forgotten as Filip reached out a hand to caress the side of her face, and he leaned forward, pressing his lips firmly against hers. They were soft, and Gabby could feel them move against hers as his tongue lightly traced the outline of her lips.

Gabby's breath caught in her throat, and her knees went weak. She could taste the nicotine on his lips, could feel the bristles of his facial hair as they tickled her.

The door opened, and Bobby noisily stumbled in. Gabby and Filip broke apart, both stepping back to make it look as though they _hadn't _just kissed each other, and _weren't _guilty of anything.

Bobby, drunk and cheerful, was none the wiser. "What? You two come out jus' t'greet me?" he slurred.

Fillip shook his head in disbelief at the sight of the drunken man. "It's only three thirty."

"So?" Bobby countered with a sloppy shrug. "I was thirsty." He tripped over one of the dining chairs, swearing at it.

"You have a gig tonight, Bobby," Gabby meekly reminded him.

Bobby stared blankly for a few seconds, trying to figure out what she was talking about. His drunken mind was in no state to be recalling anything. Gig? What gig? _That one at the place with those people for the thing, _his fuzzy memory managed. "Aw, shit. I forgot." He fell into a chair.

"Yeah." Gabby sighed. Bobby was a bit of an alcoholic. Well, _all _of the members of samcro were slight alcoholics, except Jax and Opie, but Bobby was second to only Piney, who had a glass of whiskey with breakfast.

She wandered into the kitchen to pour him a glass of water. She could feel Filip's eyes on her, and offhandedly wondered what he was thinking. Was he focused on Bobby or, like her, was he still thinking about the kiss. Did he regret it? Had he enjoyed it?

Filip obviously would have had experience with kissing, would have known what he was doing. Gabby's experience was based on a geeky kid named Pete, who'd slobbered all around her mouth because he'd thought that's how it was done based on movies, and Lucy, who'd kissed her once to see if it felt different to kissing a boy.

She placed the glass next to Bobby. "Here," she told him. "At least try and sober up a bit."

Bobby grunted. Shaking her head, Gabby retreated to her bedroom. If Bobby still appeared drunk when he was on stage, he'd be out of a job. If he missed the gig, he'd be out of a job; he was on his last warning, which was all he ever seemed to be on.

There was a knock on Gabby's door a few hours later. It wasn't Bobby; Filip had already taken him to his gig. There was only one other person it could have been.

She put her book down. "Yeah?"

The door opened, and a bashful Filip stepped in. He glanced at her, sighed, and dropped his gaze, leaning against the doorframe. "I shouldn't have done that," he finally told her.

Gabby's heart sank. So it was regret that he felt. "Why?" she managed. Did he think she was too ugly? Too shy? Not quite old enough?

"Because ye're only sixteen. You're a child, Gabby. I shouldn't be..." he trailed off.

"It's just a number."

Filip shook his head. "It doesn't work like that, kid. You know that." He went and sat down on the bed, running his fingers through his hair.

Gabby bit the inside of her lip, hugging her knees to her chest. "It could," she breathed.

She wasn't going to give up on the opportunity, not while she had it. Not while he obviously felt something for her, too.

Gabby crawled across the bed. She lightly touched his face, bringing him to face her. Her fingers brushed against his scar. Before she could say anything else, he reached up and grabbed her hand. "Ye know why I came here?" Filip asked.

"No."

"Because of jealousy. A man called James O'Phelan took my wife, my daughter. He's a dangerous man and he'd kill me if I went back," Filip told her. "He didn't like that my wife chose me over him."

Gabby's eyes flicked to the scars on his face. "He did that?" She purposely avoided asking the question she wanted to.

"Aye. And ye're missin' the point."

"You're married." It wasn't a question. "And you still love her," she reluctantly added.

Filip let her hand drop as he nodded. Gabby could feel the tears welling in her eyes. She slipped off the bed, skirting out of Filip's desperate grasp.

"Gabby! Hey!" He took off after her, catching her around the waist before she could leave the house. "I'm sorry, Gabby."

Gabby wiped her eyes impatiently. "Let me go."

"Don't run off," Filip told her, loosening his hold.

"Just let go." Gabby didn't want to hear anything else he had to say. She'd already heard enough.

Filip let go. "I can't jus' forget her. Whether I can go back or not, it's not that easy."

Gabby ignored him. That was it. Anything she'd hoped for, dreamed about. Gone. Just like that.

"Gabby?"

"It doesn't matter," she told him. "I guess I just overreacted."

"Hey..."

"I'm going to bed."

Filip watched her walk off, wondering why on earth he'd said any of that. She had to know, of course, but he could tell that his love for Fiona was turning into something less romantic, as his feeling for Gabby grew. He swore. How stupid could he be? What was this mess he was getting himself into?


	7. Of Mortgages and Fruit

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Mortgages and Fruit

* * *

**A/N:**Firstly, thank you to Dahlia Rose-Marie, medousaki, Venetiangrl92. Your reviews are greatly appreciated! :)

Secondly, I'm sorry for the lateness of this chapter; I actually rewrote the whole thing, because I was going to have it go in a completely different direction, but I liked this version better, and then we had Internet problems; our service provider decided that 'because you pay us a billion dallors each month for ADSL2 Internet, we're going to **cut you off** because we're pricks.' So we had to fix that up... T_T

Anyhow, here be words.

* * *

When Gabby woke the next morning, she felt a sense of foreboding, as though something was going to happen. Something that she would not like in the least. No one was awake when she left for school, heavyhearted and fresh from rejection.

The halls were mostly empty, too, so Gabby waited for Lucy outside, in the shade of the tree they'd spent most of their school lives sitting under. They'd respectively named it Oscar.

Lucy didn't arrive by foot as she usually did; a sleek black commodore pulled up by the side of the road, and out jumped a beaming Lucy. She waved, shut the door and bounded up to Gabby as the car drove off. "It's nice, isn't it?" she enthused.

"The car, or your smile?"

Lucy rolled her eyes. "Both, I guess." She glanced around to make sure no one was listening. "We did it," she hissed.

"You 'did it'?" Gabby raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah; we had sex."

Gabby scowled, rubbing her eyes. "I really don't need to know."

"In the back of _that _car."

"I am not listening."

"It was _amazing_," Lucy sang. She did a little happy dance.

"And what does your mom think of him?" Gabby asked as they headed inside.

Lucy hesitated, which was more than enough confirmation for Gabby. "You haven't told her, have you?"

"Okay, here's the thing; he's 21. Mom will _kill _me."

"There's nothing wrong with that," Gabby told her, as she thought miserably that Filip was 27. Even though they weren't going anywhere. She sighed.

"Gabby, come on. You know my mom doesn't think like that, and if she finds out we had _sex_ then we're both dead. He'll get in a lot of trouble. Anyway; how are you and the Scotsman going?"

She'd been waiting for the conversation to turn to her and her lack of love life. She considered lying, telling Lucy that nothing had yet happened. But that would just make things worse. "He sort of turned me down," Gabby told her. "After we kissed."

"Are you serious? What so he kissed you, and then just decided that 'no, actually, I changed my mind'? What a prick."

Gabby shook her head. "It's not like that," she said. She couldn't tell Lucy about Filip's wife and kid. "He just... it was the age difference, really. I'm 16, he's 27. I imagine a few people would have some things to say about that, along with the law."

"Yeah, I guess," Lucy agreed. "But that's only if you have sex, right?" Then she laughed. "And I was worried about a four year gap. He's like, eleven years older than you!"

Gabby chuckled. "Yeah. I know."

"Sorry," Lucy said, cringing. "That sucks. You know, a _lot_. I'm sure you guys'll be fine. You're 17 soon, so then it's just a year's wait before the two of you can get busy." Lucy winked, waggling her eyebrows suggestively.

"Hey!" A breathless, bruised Jessica rushed up to them. The swelling on her face had gone down, but she still looked terrible. Gabby subconsciously rubbed the gash on her forehead. It ached. "I heard about Jeremy. Thanks!"

Gabby blinked, dumbfounded. "I... what?"

"He deserved it, he really did. The beating."

"Oh... that wasn't me," Gabby told her. "I'm not really a... fighter."

"Well that's the rumour going around, anyway," Jessica informed her.

"Great. Just what I need; rumours."

Lucy smiled. "At least people will be scared of you now," she said.

Gabby scowled. "I don't want people to be scared of me."

"Too late now."

* * *

Bobby and Filip were sitting at the table when Gabby arrived home. "Why aren't you at work?" Gabby asked, grabbing an apple.

"Finished early," Bobby said. "Gotta help Chibs with all this."

Gabby raised an eyebrow. "Help Chibs with 'all this' what?" She took a bite of the apple. It was bitter.

"Ah all this paperwork for the loan."

"Loan?" Gabby didn't like where this was going, and Filip refused to look at her.

"Yeah; Chibs got a house, as long as he get can a loan from the bank."

"A house? You're moving out?"

Filip glanced at her. "That's the plan. Can't live off Bobby forever."

Gabby nearly dropped the apple. Instead, she threw it in the bin, her appetite gone. "Well, that's great," she lied. "I'm gunna take a shower." She walked off.

If she hadn't have kissed him, maybe he wouldn't be moving out so soon, Gabby thought. She should have known it was a stupid idea when she'd done it. Of course it would make things complicated and awkward. He would have had to move out eventually, just like she would, but maybe he would have stayed a while longer if it hadn't have been for the kiss.

The steaming heat of the shower did nothing for Gabby, and she got out just a downcast she'd been when she got in. She dressed, rubbed at her hair in a pathetic attempt to dry it, and retreated to her room. Stupid. Stupid.

Filip came into her room a while later. He didn't even knock or, if he had, she hadn't heard it. He had the kind of look on his face that most people reserved for when they found their cat flattened on the road, stinking of rot and accumulating flies.

Neither of them spoke for a while. "Ye know, I've been lookin' at houses for a while," he finally told her.

"So?"

"So it's not your fault."

Gabby shrugged. "I don't really care," she lied. She sighed. "Why did you kiss me?" she asked.

Filip blinked. He hadn't been expecting that question. He leaned against the doorframe, thinking. "It was a stupid thing to do." His words felt like knives to Gabby. He must have realised, because he added, "you're too young, Gabby."

"You didn't answer my question. _Why_ did you kiss me back?"

"Because I wanted to," Filip told her. He thought about playing the wife card again, but realised it would be stupid to. He still loved Fiona, but he couldn't ignore his growing feelings for Gabby, either. "Do you even know how much trouble both of us could-"

"I'm not a complete idiot."

Filip sighed. He seemed to be battling with himself. He opened his mouth to say something, sighed, and closed it. Silently, he approached Gabby. He tangled his fingers in her hair, leaned over and placed a kiss on the top of her head. "Gotta take these forms in," he said as he left.

Gabby watched him leave, confused. Was that some kind of answer? A kiss on the top of her head? was that Irish for 'yes' or something? Or was it 'no'? Gabby was just as lost and confused as she had been before.

* * *

There was a commotion by the road when Gabby finished school the next day. It wasn't the kind of commotion that was so blatantly obvious that its existence couldn't be denied, it was the kind that sent whispers and rumours around, where people stared, but tried to make it seem as though they _weren't _staring. Curious, Gabby wormed her way through the masses of students, some of who were also interested by whatever it was, others going about their daily business, to see what it was. When she reached the cause of the commotion, she wished she hadn't been so curious.

On the side of the road, there was a motorbike. And sitting on the bike, puffing on a smoke with a helmet dangling from the other hand, was Filip. He'd already spotted her. Of course he'd already seen her, because he was waiting for her. Gabby blushed furiously as she approached him, amid a new wave of whispers.

"Wh... what are you doing here?" she hissed.

As an answer, Filip tossed the helmet to her, patted the space behind him. "Get on," he commanded, flicking the cigarette butt to the ground.

It was either get on and hear the rumours the next day, or attempt to walk through the rumours now. Gabby shoved the helmet on her head and threw a leg over the bike. She wrapped her arms around Filip's waist as he revved the bike, then took off.

Gabby didn't pay attention to where he was taking her; all she could think was 'oh, God, what kind of rumours are going around?' so she was relatively surprised when the bike slowed down, and he parked next to a diner. It was one Gabby had never been to before, but it wasn't the crappy kind of diner that looked as though it belonged in a caravan park; it actually looked quite nice.

"You're taking me out?" Gabby asked, taking the helmet off. She hopped up from the bike, Filip behind her.

"Is that wha' you and yer friends do every time you ye go to a diner? 'Take each other out'?"

"No, because Lucy's a girl," Gabby informed him.

"Well wha' about the rest of them?"

Filip held the door open for Gabby as she walked in. "The rest of who?"

"Yer friends." They sat in the corner, opposite each other.

"Unless the boys at the shop count, it's just me and Luce," Gabby said with a shrug.

Filip didn't believe her. "Wha'? No other friends?"

Gabby shook her head. "A few kids talk to me, but they're not really friends."

"Oh..." Filip couldn't really think of anything else to say. Fortunately, the waitress came to take their orders, sparing Filip. When she was gone, Filip said, "ah, people are shite anyway. Ye've got the club, and Bobby..." he trailed off at that, and Gabby smiled.

"Yeah. The Jew who can't cook his own banana bread."

Filip chuckled. "Aye, that's the one."

"And you?"

"Wha' about me?" Filip asked.

Gabby dropped her gaze, picking at a thread on her jumper. "Do I have you?"

Filip was silent for so long that Gabby glanced up, just to make sure he was still there. He was, and he just stared at her, his expression unreadable. He tapped a finger on the table as Gabby waited for what seemed long an impossibly long time.

He finally opened his mouth to speak, a word barely audible. "Aye."


	8. Of Bosses and House-Warmings

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Bosses and House-Warmings

* * *

**A/N:**Here it is; the new chapter. Obviously. Thanks to Dahlia Rose-Marie and Venetiangrl92 for your reviews! You guys keep my motivation running!

* * *

The school was buzzing for about a week afterwards. Gabby found herself overwhelmed by rumours and questions, from people she'd never even seen before. 'He's from the Sons, isn't he?' 'How many people has he killed?' 'Are you two, like, _dating_?' 'What about Jax? Do you talk to him?'

Gabby, not used to so much attention, was at a loss of how to answer. Even Jeremy came up to her and asked a few curious questions. "They... they're not gunna kill me, right?" he asked nervously.

It was difficult for Gabby to not answer with a nod, but she eventually shook her head. "No. I doubt it."

"Okay, good." His fear seemed to melt away, and he threw her a filthy look. "Because I don't really want to hurt any of them. I have ties with the Mayans, you know. I disappear, and they'll want revenge, see?"

Lucy blinked. "You're white," she said.

"So what?"

"Mayans aren't. They don't care about you. You're lying. Your mom probably wouldn't even come looking for you," Lucy snapped.

Jeremy scowled. "I'm not the one playing house with the SOA." He turned to Gabby. "You can't hide behind your bikie boyfriend forever," he spat, stalking off.

Lucy shook her head. "Nothing to say to me, so he has a go at you. He's still a prick." She slung her bag over her shoulder and gave Gabby a gentle hit on the arm. "Let's go. Ask Jocy about that job."

"Yeah," Gabby agreed. They fought their way through the crowd, and out of the building. "I'm not sure I'd make a good waitress," Gabby admitted.

"Why not? You got the looks, the cooking. Teach you to make a coffee, and you'll be the best damn employee my sister's ever had."

"I'd probably drop the plates..."

Lucy laughed. Then she leaned over and pushed Gabby. Caught off guard, Gabby stumbled, but managed to keep her footing. "What was that for?"

"You've got good enough balance. You'll manage. Besides, it's not the plates you need to watch out for; it's the men." Lucy's face darkened as she tried to fight back an evil smirk.

"The... men?" Gabby didn't like where this was going.

"Oh, yeah. Thursday, Friday, Saturday, the diner does dinner, so it's open 5-10. Dinner, alcohol. Jocelyn said they get some pretty touchy men in there." She reached over and pinched Gabby on the backside, who squealed, jumping. Lucy waggled her eyebrows. "Old men, who look like they got lost on the way to the pub, in the diner, feeling you up and trying to get you into bed."

Gabby's eyebrows furrowed. "She was lying though... right?" Maybe applying at the diner was a bad idea. Gabby couldn't figure out what was worse; being felt up by strange men, or _not _being felt up, because she was too ugly. What if Jocelyn didn't like her, or Gabby _did _drop plates all the time? It was a bad idea, it really was. Gabby was going to have to tell Jocelyn that she didn't want a job anymore. There were plenty of other opportunities, in less busy places.

"No, I think she actually meant it. But Charlie's a prick of a thing, so he won't let anyone touch you." Lucy's voice broke into Gabby's thoughts.

"Charlie?"

"Yeah, he's the boss."

"And he's a prick of a thing?" Gabby asked.

"Oh yeah; horrible man. Jocelyn comes home in tears after every shift because he's so nasty. Anyway, here we are. Let's get you a job!"

Lucy had to basically drag a terrified Gabby in. Jocelyn was serving coffee when they got inside, so they waited by the counter.

"Oh, great. What do you want?" Jocelyn asked when she spotted Lucy. "Hey Gab."

"Hi."

"It's nice to see you, too," Lucy scowled. "Anyway, _I _don't want anything." She gave Gabby a nudge. When Gabby didn't say anything, she went on. "Gabby needs a job, so tell Charlie to get his fat ass out here and hire her."

Gabby blinked. Jocelyn raised an eyebrow. From the depths of the diner, a voice rang out. "Fat ass? I'll give you fat ass!" A man almost twice the size of Bobby waddled into view. A tea towel hung from his shoulder, and he wielded a greasy hamburger flipper. He glared at all of them.

If there had been any chance of Gabby getting a job, it was now gone.

"Hmm... I thought I could hear your obnoxious voice," he said to Lucy. He turned to Gabby. "You are?"

"Gabby... sir," she added.

Charlie stared at her for a moment, before he burst into laughter. "Sir?" he managed after a few minutes. "Sir!?" Even Jocelyn had a giggle.

When he'd finally settled down, he said. "So, you're looking for a job, then?" Gabby nodded. "Well, you picked a good time; our other waitress is moving up in the world. Got a resume?"

"Uh... no." Gabby had meant to do one up, but she didn't know how to write one.

Charlie seemed unfazed. "Ah, I never did like reading. We'll give you a trial run on Saturday. 10-3, for lunch. If we like you, you can come back. How's that sound?"

Gabby assumed 'we' meant him and Jocelyn. "That would be great," she told him. "Thank you." She hesitated, before asking, "what do I wear?"

"Anything, just don't come naked. I'll see you Saturday," he said, before waddling back into the depths of the diner.

"Well, that was pretty easy," Lucy said. "Told you he was a prick." She winked.

Jocelyn rolled her eyes. "Well, I gotta get back to work. See ya Saturday!" She waved them off.

"Where are you off to now?" Lucy asked as they wandered through town.

"Filip moves out today, so I thought I'd check out his new house," Gabby informed her. Lucy waggled her eyebrows. "No, Lucy."

"Of course not. I won't tell anyone."

"You won't, because there's nothing to tell."

Lucy just laughed. "Of course not. There's never anything to tell."

* * *

Filip's house was a good walk from town, a fair walk from school, and a ridiculous walk from Gabby's place. It was nice, though, she mused as she admired the exterior. Filip's bike was parked out front, and the front door was open. She knocked timidly, then let herself in.

The house was fully furnished. How they'd managed to find a house load of furniture in under a week was beyond her; Filip had come from Ireland with nothing but himself. Bobby hadn't surrendered anything, and all of the furniture looked new.

Gabby wandered into the kitchen. It was bigger than Bobby's, with an island in the middle. She found herself thinking of how much she'd enjoy cooking in it. With all of the space, she could cook twice as much than at Bobby's. She knew Gemma would think the same thing. If there was anything she and Gemma had in common, it was their love for cooking.

There were footsteps, and Filip appeared seconds later. He spotted Gabby.

"I knocked," she promised. "But the door was open anyway." She leapt onto the island counter. "It's nice."

"Aye, and expensive," Filip informed her. "I'll be paying off the mortgage even after I die."

Gabby laughed. "At least you picked a good house for it."

Filip leaned against the bench opposite Gabby. He pulled out a smoke, lighting it up. "Bobby said ye were going do to the diner, see about a job," he said.

Gabby rolled her eyes. Of course Bobby did. Bobby'd probably called a meeting for the club, _just _to inform them all of that fact. "Yeah, I did."

"How did it go?"

"Great. Lucy dragged me in there and demanded they give me a job. She called the boss a fat ass and a nasty prick." Filip's eyebrows shot up. "I've got a trial this Saturday."

"Well, that's good news."

Gabby smiled. "It is. How many people have you killed?"

Filip choked on the smoke he'd just inhaled. "Where the hell did you get a question like that from?" he managed, still coughing.

"Nowhere," Gabby lied. "I was curious." In truth, she'd been dying to ask ever since Ashley had asked _her _a few days ago. She knew it wasn't a good conversation starter, but she was very curious.

Filip seemed lost for words. "Ye don't need to know that kind of shite," he said after a while.

"So a fair few, then," Gabby guessed.

"Jesus Christ." Filip rubbed his face. He sighed. "I don't know," he admitted. "And _you _don't need to know."

Gabby wondered if she really did want to know. She was a curious person by nature, so she often found herself privy to knowledge she'd rather not be, even if it had been her curiosity that drove her to find out in the first place. She decided it didn't matter, either way. "I know."

The faint sounds of motorbikes in the distance grew to a roar. Gabby and Filip glanced out the window to see Jax and Tig pulling up. "House-warming?" Gabby asked.

Filip shook his head. He leaned over, giving Gabby a chaste kiss. "No idea," he told her.

Jax and Tig didn't knock. They walked in, as though they knew exactly where Filip would be. "This place is nice," Tig said. "I'll be movin' in next week."

"Tig, Jackie Boy."

Jax inclined his head. He frowned when he saw Gabby. "Hey," he said.

"Hey," Gabby greeted. She scratched her head awkwardly. No one besides Lucy knew about her and Filip's... relationship. She was loathe to think of the uproar it would cause. Or the one it wouldn't.

She and Filip were making slow progress, which suited Gabby fine. She'd never really been in a relationship before to know what she was supposed to do, and Filip was still beating himself up about the underage thing. They'd both had an unspoken agreement that they wouldn't have sex, which made Gabby feel a bit better; as much as she wanted to, the thought of having sex, being naked in front of someone else, terrified her.

"What are you doing here?" Tig asked her. He ran a finger down the wall, as if checking for dust.

"Admiring the kitchen," Gabby replied.

Jax chuckled. "My mom would put this place to good use," he said, surveying the room with appreciation.

"The both of you would," Tig told Gabby. He plopped down at the dining table.

Gabby grinned. "Yeah. We should have a house-warming."

"No. Absolutely not," Filip told her with a scowl.

"Aw, c'mon Chibs," Tig whined.

"Yeah, come on, Chibs," Gabby mocked.

Filip looked to Jax for help, but the boy just smiled. "I can already hear Gemma scouring pots and sharpening knives."

With no way out of it, Filip reluctantly gave in. "Fine. You plan it," he said to Gabby.

"Yes, sir."


	9. Of Dinner and Hours

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Dinner and Hours

* * *

**A/N:**As always, thank you to liiddee and Venetiangrl92! You guys are awesome!

**WARNING: **This story has (near the end) a little bit of... Smutty-ish content. I dunno. I always turn into a little girl at those scenes, and I don't even know if they're any good, so let me know what you think, kay?

* * *

Gemma had jumped at the thought of cooking in Filip's new kitchen. It was only a small event – the boys, Gemma and Gabby – but Gemma took it as seriously as one of her thousand head dinners that she held every other month at her house. And, while Filip's table wasn't nearly as large as Gemma's, she still managed to fit five dishes, another five sides, and still have room for the plates and drinks on it.

As they prepared the food, they talked about Gabby's new work, because what else could they discuss?

"I think I did a pretty good job," Gabby said as she sliced the carrots. "I mean, Charlie didn't yell at me, and Jocelyn seemed impressed."

"Did you drop any plates?" Gemma asked, juggling her cigarette with a mixing spoon.

Gabby smiled. "Almost. But I managed to keep all the food on it. Jocelyn told me Charlie was pretty impressed that I didn't even spill anything. She said next week he'll get me to do dinner as well. It'll be busy."

"You'll do fine, baby," Gemma assured her.

They chatted on as they cooked, trying to hear each other over the din; the kitchen and dining were open plan, along with the living room.

One of the boys would come in occasionally, to grab a beer or try and steal a taste. Gemma would set them straight with a rap to the knuckles, though, and they'd head back empty handed.

When they'd bought out all the dishes and taken their seats, Tig leaned over and sniffed. "Smells like mom's cooking," he told them.

"It smells lovely," Filip said, "thank you."

"Don't thank us. We're family," she told him.

They all dug in, starved, as they talked and laughed. Filip had finally come out of his shell, and was talking animatedly to the other guys. He glanced over at Gabby, who smiled at him. He smiled back.

Piney's voice carried across the table, his obnoxiously loud comment directed at Gabby. "Have you decided yet?"

Gabby stared at him dumbly. "Decided what?" she asked, aware that there were eight pairs of eyes trained on her.

"Your birthday," Piney said. "You'll be seventeen in a few days."

"Yeah, and then it's only one more year until you can legally decide whether or not you give a shit about who's President," Tig added.

"Are you having a dinner?" Gemma asked.

Gabby shrugged. "I don't know," she told them. To be honest, she didn't really want to do anything for her birthday, but she knew there was no getting out of it.

"You don't know?"

"It's in four days," Bobby said, as if she needed reminding of when her birthday was.

"I know that, Bobby," Gabby assured him.

"We'll have a dinner," Clay said.

Jax nodded. "Yeah; mom'll be happy to cook for you."

"It'll be a feast. Food, booze and pussy!" Tig enthused.

Bobby whacked him over the head as Gabby laughed. "No pussy," Bobby told him.

Tig groaned.

"Your friends can come," Gemma told her. "Just let me know how many are coming, okay?"

"We're all invited by default," Opie said. "Just so you know."

"Can I uninvite you by default?" Gabby joked. If the boys didn't come to her dinner, not only would it be a very sad event, but it wouldn't feel right. They were as close to family as she would ever get.

Tig scowled. "No."

Gabby smiled. "Figures," she said. "I'll let you know tomorrow," she told Gemma. The woman nodded and, the situation settled, the boys went back to their conversations.

Gabby glanced up to see Filip watching her with an unreadable expression. She ducked her head. She hadn't mentioned anything to him about her birthday. It wasn't because she thought he wouldn't care anyway, but because she figured he didn't need a reminder of how old she wasn't.

Filip hadn't bought up the matter of age again, but Gabby could tell it bothered him. In between the conversations and longing glances, the intimate hugs and soft kisses, she knew he was fighting an internal battle with himself.

Every now and then he would look at her, and his gaze would drop as he sighed, and he would run a hand through his hair. These were the times when Gabby wondered if he regretted his decision, and she would be tempted to go up to him and let him know that, if didn't want whatever it was they had, then he could just say so.

The only thing that stopped her was her fear of the answer.

* * *

Like every other year, the only person Gabby invited was Lucy. Gabby knew she'd say yes even before she asked, so she just handed her friend a piece of paper with Gemma's address on it. "It's for my birthday," she said. "Be there by-"

"Seven," Lucy finished. "I know, it's the same every year." She handed the piece of paper back without even glancing at it. "And so is Gemma's address."

The next couple of days passed without incident. Gabby wasn't too thrilled about her birthday. It was never an exciting event, and though she had fun, and everyone tried to be surprising, she could basically guess what they would get her; Gemma always took her clothes shopping; Bobby, hopeless as ever, flashed some cash at her, before shoving it in a jar and assuring her he'd buy a real nice car for her 18th; Opie and Jax pooled their present, giving her some cash and a porcelain doll, if only so they could laugh at the terror on Tig's face; Clay would tell Gemma to buy her something nice; and Tig had, at Gabby's insistence, stopped giving her presents after he'd gifted her a vicious hamster that almost tore her finger off.

Piney and Lucy were perhaps the only two whose presents Gabby could never guess. Lucy always got her books, and Gabby _loved _books. And Piney's present was always something antique, possibly as old as him, and the things he gave her always fascinated her.

The previous year, he'd given her a typewriter. The year before she'd received a small chest full of old coins from all around the world. Gabby was truly excited to see what she'd get from him this year.

Because her father and Piney had been close friends, Piney doted on her, and Gabby enjoyed hearing stories from him in his youth, because they always contained her father. Bobby told stories, too, but they were always so mellow, and Gabby enjoyed the ones with action.

The morning of her birthday, she woke to the smell of eggs and bacon. Afraid to step into the kitchen, she crept out cautiously. Bobby was bent over the stove, his face a picture of concentration as he stared avidly at the pan. He mumbled quietly to himself. After a while, he turned the hotplate off, and dumped the contents of the pan on two plates.

Gabby glanced appreciatively at the food. "It smells nice."

If Bobby was startled that she was there, he didn't show it. "I finally mastered the art of bacon and eggs," he told her. "I'm going to make banana bread today." He placed the two plates on the table.

"Just don't burn the house down," Gabby joked, taking a seat.

"I'll try not to." He leaned over, placing a kiss on her cheek. "Happy birthday, darlin'."

"Thanks, Bobby." She dug into the eggs and bacon, as Bobby watched her for any signs of disgust. Bobby was not known for his cooking expertise. "It's delicious," she assured him.

Satisfied, Bobby started on his own. "I might make a career of it, yet," he told her. "What do you think? Think Charlie'll hire me?"

Gabby laughed. "Sorry, Bobby, but they've already got an egg 'n' bacon chef."

"Oh. That's a shame."

After Gabby finished her breakfast, she thanked Bobby again, said goodbye, and headed off to school, politely declining his offer to take her. Lucy was there when she arrived, throwing her arms around her and wishing her a happy birthday. "But you're not getting your present until dinner," she said.

The day went slow, and by the time school was finished, Gabby was ready to go home and sleep. That wasn't a possibility, though, because Lucy insisted they go to the diner, and even if she said no to that, she couldn't really avoid Filip, waiting out the front as he straddled his bike, causing ripples of whispers to surge through the crowd. It was the absolute last thing Gabby had expected.

"Did you know he'd be here?" Lucy asked as they made their way to him.

Gabby shook her head. "Nope."

"Well, at least you can formally introduce me to him," Lucy enthused.

"Hey," Gabby said when they were within earshot. "I didn't know you were picking me up," she told him. Of course she didn't. He'd only done so once, and she'd nearly had a heart attack because of it.

"That's the beauty of a surprise," he said. "Are ye busy?"

"No, she's not," Lucy told him. She held a hand out. "I'm Lucy."

Filip shook it. "Chibs."

"I didn't know Chibs was short for Filip." At the rise of a curious eyebrow, Lucy shamelessly added, "Gabby talks about you all the time."

Gabby flushed. "No, I don't."

"You do. She does. Anyway, I've gotta go to work," Lucy lied, "so I'll see you two tonight." And with that, she left.

Red-faced, Gabby ducked her head. "She's a compulsive liar."

Grinning, Filip held out a helmet. With nowhere to go and nothing to say, Gabby grabbed it, shoved it on, and mounted the bike, wrapping her arms around Filip. He kicked the bike to life and took off.

While Gabby wasn't too keen on the bike ride, she loved the feel of her arms around Filip's waist, and her head resting on his back. All too soon, however, the ride was over, as he pulled into his driveway.

Gabby hopped off, unclipping the helmet. She didn't dare to think what they were doing at his house. Thoughts ran through her mind, causing her to blush as she followed Filip inside. "Does Bobby know you were picking me up?" Gabby asked, because she couldn't think of anything else to say.

Filip shook his head. "You know, ye forgot to mention your birthday was coming up," he told her.

"I didn't think it would matter," Gabby told him, leaning her back against the wall.

Nodding, Filip dropped his head. "Come here," he said, waving his hand.

Gabby blinked. "Why?"

"Because I said so."

Confused, Gabby approached him, aware of his gaze. When she was within arm's reach, she stopped. Butterflies danced in her stomach, as she stared at him, and he stared back.

After what felt like an impossibly long time, Filip spoke again. "Turn around."

"I... what?"

Filip just raised an eyebrow in answer. Gabby slowly turned around, as confused as ever. She couldn't see what he was doing, and couldn't hear anything. The butterflies that were dancing inside her became a stampede.

A flash of silver passed Gabby's gaze, and she gasped as something cold touched her chest. She jumped. "Stop fidgeting," Filip scolded.

"I'm not," Gabby protested, craning her head to get a better look.

Filip thwacked her on the ear. "Ouch!"

"We'd if ye'd stop fidgeting, I wouldn't have to smack ye," he justified.

Gabby sighed, rolling her eyes. "There," Filip finally said.

Glancing down, Gabby's eyes fell upon a simple silver cross. Whatever she'd been expecting, it wasn't this. "Oh, wow. It's beautiful." She turned to face Filip. "Did you buy this?" she asked, because she couldn't believe someone would buy her something so beautiful.

"No."

She looked at him.

"I didn't steal it, if that's what ye think."

"Where did you get it?"

As an answer, Filip leaned forward, placing a hand on either side of her face, and a soft kiss on her lips. "Happy birthday," he whispered.

Gabby reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck as she pulled him in for another kiss. Their lips moved in time as Filip's hands left her face and fell down to hold her hips. Throwing caution in the wind, Gabby tangled her fingers in his hair, pulling him impossibly close.

Filip ran his tongue across Gabby's lips, fighting for entrance. He slipped a hand under her shirt, running it up her back. His light touch set Gabby's skin on fire, as she felt a heated sensation pooling between her legs, throbbing.

In that moment, Gabby forgot everything, except the feel of Filip's lips against hers, and his soft, burning touch against her skin. She forgot that she was seventeen, and he was twenty-seven. She forgot that they'd made an unspoken pact what seemed to be years ago, and she forgot the serious amount of trouble that the both of them could get into.

Filip, it seemed, had also forgotten, as he stepped forward, pushing her back until she slammed into the wall with a gasp. His hand went down to caress her buttocks, squeezing it lightly as he rolled his groin against hers.

Gabby moaned, dropping her hands to tug at the hem of his shirt. She pushed at the sides of his cut, and he shrugged out of it, before Gabby grabbed his shirt again. She pulled it up, and they broke apart for a second, as she ripped his it off, dropping it on the ground.

He had a tattoo on his chest, but Gabby didn't get to see what it was. He ripped her top off, depositing it with his, and his lips crashed against hers again. His skin gave off an impossible heat as it pressed against hers.

Filip's hands ran down the backs of her thighs, tugging on them. Gabby lifted them as he did, wrapping her legs around his waist, pulling him even closer. The bulge in his pant pressed into her groin as he ground his hips against her.

Gabby moaned into his lips, hooking her arms under his, securing a firm grip on his shoulders. Filip wrapped a hand around her middle, the other under her ass as he carried her to the bedroom.

Filip fell onto the bed with her under him, his weight against her as he undid her pants. He sat up, straddling her, and Gabby raised her hips off the bed so he could tug them off, leaving her in nothing but her bra and panties. He looked her up and down.

Feeling suddenly exposed, Gabby raised herself into a sitting position to kiss him, catching his bottom lip in hers. Her hands fell to his pants and the realisation of what she was about to do struck her as she struggled to undo his jeans. Filip grabbed her face to deepen the kiss.

Gabby finally managed to get his jeans undone, and he leaned back over, forcing her down with him. She ran her hands up his back, feeling the ripples of his muscles, the raised skin of scars, and the heat that was emitting from him. In return, his hand travelled down her body, cupping her breast, massaging it, before travelling down, between her legs, lightly rubbing the sensitive skin. His touch burned and tickled at the same time, but Gabby needed more. Another moan escaped from her lips. His hand kept wandering, however, around her leg to stroke her ass.

Filip abruptly broke the kiss, as though waking from a dream. His eyes searched hers. Then he swore. "Shite."

"What?" Gabby began to panic. Had she done something wrong? Was she not supposed to have undone his pants? Did he not like the look of her body? Or the feel of it? Were her breasts too small?

Filip closed his eyes with a sigh, shaking his head. "We can't do this," he said. He went to get up, but Gabby wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him close. "Gabby..."

"We can," Gabby told him. Her groin was throbbing, aching for him.

"No, we can't."

Gabby wasn't hearing him. "I want this, Filip."

Filip reached up to pull Gabby's hands away. "We can't." He placed a soft kiss on her lips. "Go and get dressed." He rolled off her, and moved to sit at the foot of the bed, head in his hands.

Silently, Gabby slid off the bed. She shimmied into her jeans, the throbbing in her groin ebbing away. She wandered into the lounge to find her top, and pulled it over her head. Grabbing Filip's shirt and cut, she went back into the bedroom. He hadn't moved.

Gabby sat next to him, holding his shirt out. Filip glanced at it. "Thanks," he said, taking it. He put it on, and they fell silent again.

"I'm sorry," Gabby told him, because she couldn't think of anything else to say, and she couldn't stand to see him like this.

Filip blinked, looking up at her. He chuckled, reaching a hand up to ruffle her hair. "Ye did nothing wrong," he told her, kissing her on the forehead. "Come on; I'll take ye home before Bobby comes looking."

Wordlessly, Gabby stood and headed to the garage. Filip caught her by the arm, forcing her to stop. "Don't beat yourself up," he said. "It's just a year."

"That's three hundred and sixty-five days," Gabby told him. "Which is _only _eight thousand, seven hundred and sixty-six hours."

"Why do you even know that?" Filip asked.

Gabby shrugged. "I'll be counting."


	10. Of Secrets and Troubles

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Secrets and Troubles

* * *

**A/N: **Gosh. I'm happy for all the reviews. Averys1, Dahlia Rose-Marie, CupKatyCakes, liiddee, medousaki, and Venetiangrl92 (you're my constant, and you're awesome). And thank you for the feedback on my smutty smut. You all deserve cookies. :)

This chapter is a step down from the last. And if you don't notice, I had SOOOOO much fun with the Gemma parts. So. Much. Fun. :D Gemma is a love/hate character for me. So much love/hate. Also, you may come across a certain part where you're like 'okay, that's a bit random'. If you do then know that yes, yes it was randomly shoved in. It was not planned at all.

* * *

Gemma knew things. Oh yes, she _knew. _She knew things she was supposed to know, things she wasn't. She knew things she wished she didn't know and things she wasn't sure she knew. Gemma knew everything about everyone. In the tangled web of secrets and knowledge that was everything about everyone, Gemma was the spider who felt its every vibration. She was the fly on the wall. She was the child you would spill out your deepest, darkest secrets to because, well because it's a _child_. And if, by chance, there was ever a thing that Gemma didn't know, well...

She _would _find out.

Gabby's birthday dinner had been a fun occasion. Gemma really thought so. She'd arrived with Bobby, before Lucy and Chibs, but after everyone else. She'd arrived with a new piece of jewellery. A necklace with a silver cross.

Naturally, everyone had noticed it. It had been Tig who'd asked. "That looks like an expensive present," he said. "From a secret admirer?"

Gabby blinked, momentarily confused.

"The necklace."

Everyone stared, waiting for the answer.

Gemma supposed she was the only on to notice it. The way a fair shade of pink slowly crept into her cheeks. The way she'd touched the cross as though it was the most precious thing in the world. The hesitation in her voice as she said, "it was Lucy."

The boys accepted it. How could they not? Even her Jax was as inattentive to subtleties as a blind man.

But there's nothing Gemma doesn't see; nothing she doesn't notice.

When Lucy arrived, so did the first secret. Gemma greeted her in kind. Lucy waved at Gabby. Gabby waved back. Lucy whistled. "That's a nice necklace," she said to Gemma. "Who bought it?"

Gemma didn't even hesitate. "It is nice, isn't it? I knew it would look beautiful on her."

Lucy nodded her appreciation. "Expensive?"

"Ask no questions, baby," Gemma had told her as she went to take her seat. A secret necklace, from a secret person? Something Gemma _didn't _know? She would certainly have to find out.

The first secret arrived with Lucy. The first suspicion arrived with the Scotsman.

Chibs arrived late, as he usually did. He smiled to the group, but his eyes were on Gabby, which wasn't unusual on one's birthday. But he didn't have a present, and he didn't wish her a happy birthday. Almost as though he'd already seen her, already wished her a happy birthday and given her a present. His necklace hung loosely, swinging from side to side as he pulled in his chair. It was a cross.

Gemma glanced from Gabby to Chibs. Chibs looked normal, but he was fairly good at hiding his emotions, anyway. Gabby, on the other hand, had twitchy eyes, and a recurring blush that appeared whenever her eyes strayed upon the Scotsman. Gemma shook her head. No. No, it wasn't possible.

Gabby was seventeen. Chibs was twenty-seven. It was ridiculous just thinking about it. But Gemma couldn't help the thought. It was plausible. It could certainly happen. No. Gemma laughed to herself. Gabby was still a child. What stupid things was she thinking?

They weren't happening. Gabby and Chibs weren't happening. As Gemma's eyes kept flicking between the two, the more convinced she was.

Yes.

They were happening. It was a grasp at straws, an idea so ludicrous to Gemma that she couldn't keep the thought from jumping to her mind.

And she was going to find out all about it.

Because there is _nothing _Gemma doesn't know.

* * *

"What about this one?" Gemma suggested.

Gabby glanced at the shirt, almost reluctantly. "It's alright, I guess," she replied.

Gemma put it back. They were clothes shopping, as they did for Gabby's birthday every year, because God only knows Gemma was the only source of clothes that Gabby had. "Clay wanted me to buy you something nice, but it looks like I've been beaten to it."

"Yeah. Luce's got a good eye." Gabby browsed through the shirts.

Gemma crossed her arms, shifting her weight to one leg as she watched the girl. "She does. She was curious, though, to know who bought it for you. Seemed to be under the impression that it _wasn't _her."

Gabby froze. Gemma could practically hear the girl's nervous swallow as she released the shirt she'd been looking at, and it fell back into place with its peers.

"Who gave it to you?" Gemma asked.

"Just a friend," Gabby told her. She refused to meet the older woman's gaze.

Gemma wasn't convinced. "Well, 'just a friend' doesn't spend that much money on a seventeenth birthday. Does 'just a friend' have a name?" She watched Gabby carefully for any sudden change in movement, a nervous tick to give away a lie.

Gabby thought fast. "Jessica," she said, scratching her neck.

"I have a suspicion," Gemma told her. "Think I might know who it is."

"Why, because I just told you? That's not a suspicion, Gemma."

Gemma studied the girl evenly. She had to admit, Gabby could hold her own when she wanted to. If Gemma didn't have her suspicions – which were usually right – she may have actually believed her. "You wanna hear them?"

Gabby pouted her lips in mock thought, then shook her head. "No, because they'd be wrong. Sorry Gemma, but 'just a friend' bought me a necklace."

"Okay, I believe you." They both knew this was a lie. "Why did you tell the boys it was Lucy? Come to think of it, I don't recall seeing 'just a friend'."

"Luce and Jess aren't really on good terms," Gabby said with a shrug.

"Can't get along for one day?"

"No, not really."

"I bet 'just a friend' is feeling pretty downcast. Spent all that money, and they weren't even invited."

"She was fine with it. We're going out for dinner tonight, actually. What about this one?" Gabby held up a light blue shirt. It had a wide neck, an off-the-shoulder shirt.

Gemma smiled. "Of course, baby." She took the shirt from Gabby, checking the price tag. "See if you can find something else," she said.

That was the end of the conversation as Gabby continued browsing, and Gemma watched her, a small smile playing on her lips. There was nothing she couldn't know.

* * *

When Gabby arrived home, she placed her new clothes with the rest of her gifts. True to their predictable selves, Gabby had received what she knew she would; money from Bobby (locked away in a jar for another year), and a whole loaf of banana bread (no burnt bits, and it was edible); money and a doll from Jax and Opie – the doll sat on a shelf with the rest of her collection, out in the dining room for the occasions when Tig would visit; the clothes from Gemma and Clay; and Tig had attempted to redeem himself by buying her a tarantula. He'd dropped it off at Bobby's directly, because no way no how was the poor arachnid stepping one hairy foot in Gemma's house.

She'd named the thing Archibald, as it merrily prowled around in its 10 gallon tank. She briefly wondered why on earth Tig had gotten her one – she hated spiders – but realised it was probably his payback for all the dolls. So Gabby had smiled, thanked him, and invited him round to visit, possibly to have a tea party with her dolls.

Lucy had given her a stack of Shakespeare, and Piney had lived up to the hype, presenting her with an antique wood and metal phone. It was completely useless apart from to look at, and Piney insisted it simply saved him from having to put it in his Will, but Gabby found it fascinating none-the-less. She placed it on her desk, next to the typewriter, as she pulled the dial around to rest on numbers, then let it spin back to its original position.

Birthdays were a big event for the club and its families. As the birthday person got older it became less about presents and more about 'let's all get drunk, wake up and remember nothing', but they were still celebrated. Gabby was glad she was too young to drink, as she found it difficult to keep up with all the birthdays.

"There you are!"

Gabby glanced up to see Lucy standing in the doorway. "I let myself in, because the door was unlocked, and I was worried you might have been eaten by your new buddy," Lucy explained, wandering over the Archibald. The tarantula paid her no heed as she tapped at the glass. "Can I take him out?"

"No!"

"Can I poke him?"

"No!"

"Why not?"

"Because I said so."

Lucy spun around. "So... what happened?" she waggled her eyebrows.

Gabby shrugged, because there was no way she was going to tell Lucy the truth. "Nothing."

It was a shame Lucy wasn't stupid. "Of course not. Did you guys..?"

"No. No, we didn't." It was apparent that Lucy wasn't going anywhere without the bulk of the information. "Almost."

Lucy's eyes lit up as she leapt onto the bed. "Tell me. Tell me _all _of it!"

Gabby told her, from start to finish, everything that had happened. "...and then he just... stopped, and said we couldn't do it."

"Oh." Lucy's face fell. "So, what does that mean?"

"It means he doesn't want to be registered as a sex offender," Gabby said.

"I guess he's got a good point, there."

"You 'guess'? I think it's a pretty good point." Gabby went about putting her new books in the bookshelf. "And anyway; it's only a year."

"Yeah. You've only gotta wait another three hundred and sixty-four days. But who's counting?"

Gabby turned her head. "I am."

Lucy just laughed. "Enjoy that countdown." She stood up, wandering back over to Archibald. "I was talking to Jess today; her and Jeremy are back together." Lucy spat the name _Jeremy, _as though it was a foul taste in her mouth.

"Are you serious?" Gabby asked. "After what he did to her?" She rubbed her head. The cut was little more than a scab now, but it would leave a small scar. Not as bad as Filip's, she thought. At least his had some sort of physical benefit. She smiled. Baby cheeks.

Lucy didn't notice. "That's what I thought. She's an idiot. But anyway; apparently Jeremy got in deep with drugs, like, buying and selling. Jess was saying he ripped the guys he was buying off, not giving them their cut of the profits."

Gabby sat. Drugs? She always knew Jeremy was a prick, but she never imagined he'd have anything to do with drugs. What did he need the extra money for? He was well-off, could probably get a pretty decent job with a click of his fingers. But, more to the point; samcro didn't have anything to do with drugs, and she knew Clay tried his hardest to keep them out of Charming. Obviously, it was all information that she _wasn't _supposed to know. She wondered if she should tell him.

"She said he's gotta pay back all the money he owes them by the end of the month, otherwise they threatened to kill him" Lucy finished. "Imagine that; no Jeremy. Do you think they'd actually kill him?"

Gabby scowled. "Drugs are pretty serious. You're not telling heaps of people, are you?"

Lucy scoffed at the accusation. "No! Of course not." She hesitated. "I may have mentioned something to Cole..."

"Luce!" Gabby exclaimed. She still hadn't met Cole, and while Lucy assured her he was a good person, Gabby was less than convinced.

"I won't say anything to anyone else," Lucy promised, shrugging. "But still; a world without Jeremy."

Gabby had to admit it did sound pretty enticing. She felt bad as soon as the thought crossed her mind, though she didn't know why. Did she now feel sorry for Jeremy, who had given her so much grief? Who was _still _giving her grief? Gabby shook her head. She rejected the sympathetic feelings that crept up on her. Jeremy deserved whatever had had coming.

* * *

The diner was busy. Very busy. Gabby found herself practically running from table to table, dishes swaying violently in her arms as she dodged chairs, tables and stray food, while trying to keep her balance.

Charlie wasn't, as Lucy assured her, a prick; he was a decent bloke and, it turned out, on rather friendly terms with the MC. He screamed at the cooks, swore violently at everything and nothing, and called Gabby things such as 'darling' or 'sweetheart' or, on less than better days 'oi, you!'

He was less polite to Jocelyn, but the young woman gave what she received, and Gabby was able to deduce that the two were good friends, even if Jocelyn referred to Charlie as a 'wrinkly old git', and Charlie referred to her as an 'evil hag'.

Lucy had been right about one thing, however; Gabby had gotten quite the shock the first evening when she walked past a table, only to receive a firm smack on the backside. She'd jumped a mile, almost dropping the plates as her heart raced. The man, an old fellow with barely any hair and a toothless grin, had winked at her and said, "You and me, sweetcheeks? Wadaya say?"

Not knowing what to say, while being acutely aware that this man was about twice as old as Filip, she'd hurried off, while the man and his friends burst into laughter. When she mentioned something to Charlie, he simply told her to 'give them what for and they'll leave you alone', as though he wasn't really bothered. She was fairly certain he'd gone out there, anyhow, and given the man what for himself.

Because Gabby didn't drive yet, Jocelyn would drop her off home after the evening shifts. She arrived home one night to find Bobby, Filip, Jax and Tig, the first three sitting around the table, the last hovering at the door, staring suspiciously at the dolls and ready to bolt. They all looked up as she entered.

"Uh... hi..."

They greeted her in turn.

"What are you all doing here?" she asked, because none of them looking like speaking.

Bobby cleared his throat. Filip scratched his face.

"Nothing," Jax told her.

"Yeah," Tig agreed, "we were just visiting, you know?"

Gabby raised an eyebrow.

"It's nothing to worry about," Bobby assured her.

"What did _you_ do?" Gabby asked Jax, because she noticed a few drops of blood on his shirt.

"Ah, nothin' darlin'. Just got into fight, is all."

"Why don't you go on to bed," Bobby suggested.

Gabby knew better than to argue. "Yeah. Busy night, so I'm pretty tired." She said her goodnights, and dragged her feet to her bedroom. The moment she closed the door, she pressed her ear against it.

The men were speaking in hushed voices, and Gabby could barely hear anything. She could only catch snippets of what they said.

"...Clay think?"

"...More..."

"...Too dangerous... guns..."

"Jail... long time..."

"...'O..."

"...don't give a shite!"

Gabby strained to hear more. Filip was obviously distressed, and she wanted to know why. Their voices dropped however, and before long the conversation turned to cars and bikes, and they spoke loudly, carelessly, because what did it matter if Gabby knew about spark plugs?

Gabby heard the front door open and close. Footsteps approached her door, but before she could reach her bed it opened, and Tig poked his head in. He chuckled when he saw her, half-stride, hands frozen in midair as she reached for the doona.

He leaned against the doorframe. "How much did you hear?"

"Not much," Gabby admitted.

"Good. You don't need to be knowing this shit." Tig glanced over at Archibald's tank. "He still alive in there?"

Gabby scowled. "Yes."

Tig glanced at her, shrugged, and turned back to the tank. "I thought you liked spiders."

"As much as you like dolls."

"Oh. Your face has cleared. The cut, I mean."

"Yeah; I know."

Sighing, Tig pulled the desk chair towards himself and sat down, straddling it. "I'm not really the best at giving advice and shit. I think I speak for most of the boys when I say we all suck at it. But your old man, he was a good bloke. He was in the MC longer than I was. And your mom was a good woman."

"Do you have a point?" Gabby asked.

"I do." Tig pointed at her. "My point is that we're family, whether you like it or not. And families help each other out. If you ever need help, we're here."


	11. Of Drugs and Money

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Drugs and Money

* * *

**A/N: **My reviewers; Dahlia Rose-Marie, Karli82, Venetiangrl92, shirleypositive72, blackestnight10, liiddee. Keep up the good reading!

This story has jumped around a month/ three weeks, and not much has happened, if you're wondering... :)

Also, I am not from America (I live in Australia) which is relevant in the fact that I have to do a tonne of research for some things, which may account to errors. For example: in Australia, when we go to diners and restaurants, we don't (rarely EVER) tip. And in America it seems to be the norm, sort of like 'if you don't tip then you're a shit person'. So I had to research all about that. Like, I have no idea how it works. Sex laws, and minors in California; yeah, major research.

So, if I've gotten anything wrong, feel free to give me a buzz :)

* * *

Work, Gabby soon found out, had its perks. Specifically when it came to her bank account. The base pay by itself was good enough, but the tips. The tips. Gabby was in worship of whoever had invented tipping. The diner was always busy during evenings, and Charlie always needed her during evenings. After a busy five hour shift, the money certainly added up.

Bobby constantly told Gabby to save her money, and she meant to, but every time she went into town, she found herself wanting things she'd previously never really looked at, due to a lack of money. Most of her money went to books. After a few weeks of that, she'd ended up having to save to buy a new bookcase, which she picked up from an antique store.

The antique store had bought with it more purchases. A tea set from the 1800's. Bits for her typewriter. A heavy marble globe of the world, that spun on its iron stand. She'd had to get Bobby to help cart it home, because she couldn't walk the distance with it.

After the initial excitement of having more money than she knew what to do with, Gabby gradually began to save. She was due to start her last year of schooling and even though she'd figured out what to do with her life (move in with Filip, get married, have his babies, live happily ever after, the end), she still needed a backup plan, both in case her current plans fell through, and so she had something to tell the boys every time they asked her.

No one knew about her and Filip. Gabby was sure Bobby had his suspicions, and she knew better than to think Gemma had given up on finding out the truth about her necklace (she'd been unnervingly quiet about the issue), but no one actually _knew_. It made Gabby nervous and excited at the same time.

As she waited, she fiddled with her latest purchase; a pocket knife. She desire to buy it hadn't come from an underlying need to stab someone. No, it had come from her underlying need to buy anything that looked pretty at first glance. The knife was old and it was worn, but it was made out of a deep red wood, and the dull stainless steel blade shined in the light. It was long and thin, and reminded her of a sword. She figured she'd end up with a house full of crap older than her grandparents, but the thought didn't bother her as much as it probably should have.

A hand came into view, snatching the knife out of her hands. "Where the hell did you get this?" Filip asked, studying it.

"Bought it from the antique store," she told him.

He raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

Gabby shrugged, kicking a loose stone. "Cause it looked pretty," she reasoned.

Filip's eyebrows furrowed, as he scratched his cheek. He glanced at her, went to say something, then shook his head. Gabby held out her hand for it back.

"No."

"Hey, I paid for it!"

Filip slipped the knife in his pocket. "Ye're not even eighteen."

"He didn't ask for my I.D., so I didn't show it," Gabby told him. It was a lie; the man had asked, but she told him she'd left it in her car, and offered to get it. He'd told her not to bother, because he was closing anyway, and sold it to her. Lucky, because Gabby didn't have a car or an I.D. proving her (not) adult status.

"I don't care," Filip told her, giving her a kiss. Gabby pouted. "Stop it. Ye're not gettin' it back." He shoved her in the door to the restaurant. "Come on, I'm hungry."

* * *

It was an accident, really. Gemma hadn't meant to see it. She had been shopping, and had just started off home when she realised she couldn't remember where her purse was. So she pulled over to find it. It wasn't missing, obviously, but she liked to know.

When it was safely beside her, she went to take off. That's when she looked up. _That's _when she saw it. It wasn't anything suspicious at first; just Gabby talking to Chibs. Nothing unusual. He put something in his pocket, said something to Gabby. She said something back.

He kissed her.

Gemma blinked, because she'd obviously been seeing things. By then, Chibs was pushing Gabby in the restaurant, and Gemma was positive she was going to have a heart attack.

She'd been quiet about her suspicions after failing to get anything from either Gabby _or _Chibs. Every time she'd asked the Scotsman about any love in his life, he scowled and replied with a negative. Whenever she mentioned something about Gabby, he gave her a look that said 'what, the brat that spent a month annoying the shit out of me? Don't care'.

Similarly, if she mentioned love to Gabby, the girl questioned whether any human being had an I.Q. that was low enough to even consider her, and 'just a friend' had still purchased that necklace.

Any normal person would have accepted the fact that whatever was going on between Gabby and Chibs had nothing to do with them, and so would have let the situation slide. At the very least, they would have went home, waited until they saw either one first, and then asked them about it. Because she was Gemma, however, and because she had nothing better to do, she turned the ignition off, and just sat there, waiting, as the ice-cream in the boot slowly melted.

An hour passed, with no reappearance of either party.

Ten minutes shy of the second hour, they left the restaurant. Gabby was saying something, and Chibs reached into his pocket, pulling something that looked suspiciously like a pocket knife, out. He held it out to Gabby, who grabbed for it. Chibs pulled it away before she could get a grip.

He held it above his head, a wicked grin on his face, because they both knew Gabby couldn't reach it. She tried anyway, stretching on her toes, grasping at the air. Her face was set into a scowl, but Gemma could sense the grin she held back. She jumped for the knife, colliding with him as she grabbed his arm, pulling it down so she could seize the pocket knife.

When it was safely in her pocket, she leaned into him for a kiss. Gemma was sure she hadn't imagined it this time. The fact that Chibs had just given her a knife slipped Gemma's thoughts as she watched the two.

Chibs cradled Gabby's face in his hands as he spoke, then pressed their lips together again. Gemma waited until they had left, on Chibs' bike, before she did anything. She started the car and drove home, thinking.

Now that she had the knowledge she'd been attempting to get for a few weeks, she didn't know what to do with it. Did she prance around the shop like an eleven year old singing 'Gabby and Chibs, sitting in a tree'? Did she question Bobby, because he probably knew about, seeing as Gabby lived with him? Or maybe he didn't. Maybe he wasn't privy to that information.

Gabby was only seventeen, so if the two of them were – God forbid – having _sex_, and someone found out, the both of them could get into a lot of trouble. But surely they were smarter than that. The thoughts bounced around in Gemma's mind, and she found herself pulling in Bobby's driveway, walking up to the front door and knocking lightly.

It took a moment for someone to answer. Gabby opened the door, her eyes widening in surprise when she spotted Gemma. "Uh... hi," she said, opening the door wider to let the older woman in.

"Bobby home?" Gemma asked, walking in. She sat down at the dining table. Gabby jumped up on the counter.

"Nah; he's got a gig."

"That's fortunate."

"Do you want a drink?" Gabby asked, missing Gemma's previous comment.

Gemma shook her head. "No thanks. I need to ask you something." Her gaze dropped to Gabby's chest, where the cross necklace sat.

"About what?"

"About that necklace."

Gabby sighed, her shoulders dropping. "I've told you, Gemma it was-"

"I was in town today. Went past the Quantum Restaurant." Gabby's eyes widened ever so slightly. "I saw something interesting. You and Chibs."

"What does this have to do with my necklace?" Gabby asked, because she wanted to avoid the other conversation as long as possible.

"Did Chibs give it to you?"

Gabby just nodded.

"Who knows about the two of you?"

"Luce. And now you. No one else," Gabby told her. She fiddled with the cross, biting her lip. She had no idea how Gemma would react.

"Are you having sex?" Gemma pressed. If the woman wasn't incredibly subtle, she was ridiculously blunt.

"No." Gabby shook her head. "California says I'm too young to make rational decisions about what I want to do with my body. Filip doesn't think it's worth the risk."

Gemma nodded. This was good. She had a chuckle, because Gabby was the only one who still referred to him as 'Filip'. "Do you love him?"

"Yes. I mean, I think I do."

"Can you see yourselves married with kids?" Gemma asked.

Gabby blushed at the thought of mini her-and-Filip's running around in nappies, with his cheeks and eyes, and her hair and nose. Or maybe they'd have his hair and her eyes. She wanted three children. A girl and two boys. The girl would be the youngest, so she'd have her two older brothers to watch out for her...

"I'll take that as a yes."

Gabby came crashing back to reality. "We're not really trying to hide it," she said. "Just not saying anything, at least until I'm eighteen. I think Bobby knows something's up."

Gemma nodded. "Well, you do what you think's best. I'll keep a lid on it for my part."

* * *

The air had a chill to it that seeped into Gabby's bones as she waited for Tig. Jocelyn had gone home from work sick. As she was Gabby's ride, that left Gabby with no way home. Bobby hadn't picked up, and neither had Filip or Gemma or Lucy or any-bloody-one else on the damned planet except for Tig.

And Tig, obviously, was a half hour drive away, because God knows that when there are strip clubs a five second walk from your house, and strip clubs a half hour drive from your house, you're gunna want to pick the one that's furthest away.

So Gabby waited it out in the cold and the dark, and hoped that no one attacked her, because she only had her antique pocket knife, and it was too pretty to be covered in blood. Filip had suggested she keep it on her just in case, after lecturing her for an hour about how she shouldn't have one.

Headlights came into Gabby's vision. For a moment she thought it was Tig, but realised he didn't own a car, and that bikes only had one headlight. It pulled up on the curb. Panicking, Gabby backed toward the diner. It was locked up, so she couldn't get in, but hopefully they didn't know that. She reached in her bag for the knife, gripping it tightly as she pulled it out and flicked it open.

The driver's door opened, and someone stepped out. It was too dark to see who it was, but the moment they spoke, she knew. "I need to talk to you."

Jeremy closed the distance between them. He looked worse for wear, which wasn't surprising since Lucy's rumour of him turned out to be true; he owed a lot of money to a lot of people.

"What do you want?"

"I need your help."

Gabby almost dropped the knife. Whatever she'd been expecting, it certainly wasn't this. No way, no how. Jeremy, asking _her _for help? What had the world come to?

"Wh... what kind of help?" Gabby asked.

"I got... someone wants to kill me. Your boyfriend's part of the SOA, right? So they can help me?"

It took Gabby a moment to realise he was talking about Filip. "Sons of Anarchy is a motorcycle club," Gabby recited. "Go to the police."

"I can't go to the police!" Jeremy screamed, making Gabby jump. "I... I was selling shit. Coke and meth. Didn't pay the guys on time, and now they want me dead. You know, I know all about the Sons, they're into illegal shit, but if you talk to them, they can get these guys off my back."

Gabby blinked. After everything he'd done to her, he expected her to help him? Was he stupid? The boys wouldn't help him even if she asked, even if he hadn't done to her what he did. Drugs? They weren't into that. "I can't. They can't do anything."

"C'mon Gabby, you gotta help me, here," Jeremy begged. He was near tears, almost on his knees. "I'll die, I don't wanna die, Gabby, help me _please_."

Gabby shook her head. "I can't help you, Jeremy. I'm sorry," she added, even though she wasn't. She owed him nothing.

Jeremy's eyes darkened. "If you don't help me, you'll regret it," he snarled.

"What are you gunna do about it? You'll be dead," Gabby spat, without thinking.

The moment of satisfaction she got from that comment disappeared when he grabbed her collar and slammed her against the wall. "Don't you talk back to me, you orphan bitch! You get your bikies friends down here or I swear to God I'll rip your eyes out of your head!"

Panicking, Gabby slashed at him with the knife, catching his arm. He yelled in surprise and pain as he stumbled back. She held the knife in front of her. "Stay away from me," she warned.

Jeremy tripped over his feet as he hurried back to his car, terrified. He jumped in, started it and sped off, almost crashing into another car in his hurry.

Blood dripped of the blade and Gabby hurried to wipe it off with her sleeve. She pulled her jumper off and shoved the knife back in her bag as Tig pulled up. Shivering, Gabby rushed over to him.

"Jesus, aren't you cold?" he asked.

"No," Gabby lied. Goosebumps raised on her arms as she tried to curb her shivers.

Tig tossed her a helmet. "You alright?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine," Gabby told him, shoving the helmet on. She bunched her jumper up, squeezing it between her and Tig. When she was properly seated, Tig took off.

The wind rushed through her hair, trailing behind her, as she silently wished she could throw her troubles in the air, and watch them blow away.


	12. Of Drunks and Cabbages

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Drunks and Cabbages

* * *

**A/N: **Dahlia Rose-Marie, Well I Don't Mind, liiddee, Venetiangrl92, Karli82; thank you all for your reviews, and your advice is definitely welcome!

This chapter really has nothing to do with anything. Apart from this one sentence that I thought 'hey, this could be important!' Anyway, it was fun to write, so enjoy! :D

* * *

"Come on, Gabby! It's just one!"

"No."

"Have some fun, for once in your life."

"I'll have fun when I'm old enough."

"One. Just one."

"No! ...Okay, fine. Just one."

Gabby took the shot glass, staring doubtfully at the clear liquid inside. It looked just like water. She imagined it was as she pinched her nose and tipped it up. The vodka was bland and disgusting, and burnt the whole way down.

She didn't know how she'd gotten into this situation. Well, that was a lie – she _did _know – but then again, she didn't. Why, oh why, had she agreed to go to Lucy's boyfriend's? She knew the two would be getting drunk.

Gabby figured it was the small part of her that _wanted _to try alcohol, to prove that she was mature and responsible enough to drink. But alcohol makes an idiot out of everyone, and the second and third shots went down much easier than the first.

"There we go!" Lucy enthused. She was already halfway gone, and Cole couldn't tell up from down at this point. "How do you feel?"

"Fine," Gabby told her. It was the truth. She didn't feel any different to what she did five seconds ago. Which was a shame, because she was trying to forget the previous night.

She hadn't seen Jeremy again, no yet, anyway. Nor had the police shown up to arrest her, but Gabby expected one or the other at some point. She tried to ignore the churning of her stomach, and focus instead on the spirits working its way into her bloodstream.

"It'll take a while to kick in, you know. Like a cabbage."

Cole perked up instantly. "I own a cabbage!" he slurred. "Because cabbages are good."

Lucy grinned, leaning over to kiss him. Their lips fused together as she moved her whole body to straddle him. Gabby pinched the bridge of her nose, suddenly lonely. She took another two shots. Picked up an unlit smoke and inspected it. Wished Filip was here, so she wasn't just a third wheel. She missed his smile and his voice and the way he made her smile when he did anything. Maybe she'd go visit him.

Yeah.

That was a good idea.

How far away did he live? Half an hour? An hour. Gabby figured it was closer to the latter guess. She glanced at the clock. It was only midnight. One o'clock wasn't really _too _late to visit.

But maybe it was too early.

Filip wouldn't take too kindly to being woken up at one in the morning. Be rational, Gabby.

Lucy and Cole were really getting into it. Lucy tugged at the hem of Cole's shirt, the both of them completely forgetting Gabby's existence as they lost themselves in their pleasure.

Gabby scowled. She wanted her Filip. She wanted to touch his face. Yes, that's right. His face. Faces were nice to touch. Gabby laughed at the thought of faces.

One more shot later and she was en route to Filip's, tripping and stumbling down the street as her mind was vaguely aware of the fact that her bag was still at Cole's.

* * *

It was one-thirty. In the _morning_. And someone was trying to bang Filip's door in.

He'd ignored it at first, because Lord knows he didn't want to talk to anyone at this hour of the bloody morning. After the knocking had continued for a good five minutes, he'd gotten out of bed, grudgingly, and stumbled to the front door.

He flicked the entrance light on, opening the door to find a swaying, unfocused Gabby. He blinked, dumbfounded. Was she _drunk_?

Gabby raised a hand in greeting, as she stumbled forward to place a sloppy kiss on Filip's lips. He caught her shoulders to keep her upright. "Are you drunk?" he asked, because no other words came to mind.

"No," Gabby slurred. "No, I don't drink. But don't tell Bobby, though. He thinks I'm at Luce's, because I was gunna stay there, but then we went to Cole's, and I came here because I wanted to touch your face."

Filip was speechless. He really didn't know what to say, torn between amusement, lust, and his desire to scream at her for getting drunk. He was certain Gabby had never drunk alcohol before, not even a sip, and now, here she was, barely able to stand.

She reached a hand up to him, her fingers lightly tracing one of his scars as she watched it intently. Her body pressed into his, and he groaned internally. _Seventeen, _he told himself. _Why, God, is she only seventeen?_

He dropped his hands to grab her waist. "What the hell are ye doin' drinkin'?" he asked, stepping back.

Gabby grinned, touching his lips. "Gotta have some fun," she told him, leaning in to press their lips together again. She wrapped her arms around his waist, more to steady herself than anything.

Filip groaned into her lips. He wanted this, wanted it more than anything, but he had to restrain himself. It wasn't worth getting into trouble for, and though he'd whittled his feelings for Fiona down to 'old-friend' love, he couldn't stop her face worming into his thoughts. She was there every time his mind came back to life after kissing Gabby. Every time the impure thoughts of her came to mind.

It was betrayal. Simple as that.

But he couldn't bring himself to leave Gabby. Whenever she smiled or laughed, a small part of him came back to life. Every time she spoke he thought that maybe the world wasn't all that horrible. And when she did stupid things like get drunk and wake him up at one-thirty in the morning, he couldn't help but smile and wish he was ten years younger and that Ireland never happened.

Filip loved his daughter, and his wife, but the thought of never seeing either of them again, not being able to watch his daughter grow up and have her own children... the thought shattered him, and he spent countless hours crying over it all, trying to bawl out his guilt and regrets.

When he was with Gabby, he could forget it all. Maybe that made him a horrible person for wanting to forget his wife and daughter, just for a moment, but there it was. It was something he never wanted to lose.

If that meant accepting that he'd betrayed his wife, so be it.

And if that meant holding off for a year, well... he'd have to manage.

He grabbed Gabby's hips, pulling her away. "Come on; I'll take ye home," he said.

Gabby's eyes widened. "Oh, no, you can't do that," she told him. "Bobby'll murder me."

"What am I supposed to do with ye, then?"

Gabby stumbled over nothing as she grabbed Filip's hand and pulled him towards the bedroom.

"No," Filip said. "No, we've been through this already."

"Well, I guess ye can sleep on the couch then," Gabby replied, mocking his accent. She didn't let him go, however, and Filip found himself being forcefully dragged into his own bedroom, and pulled down onto his own bed. "It's just sleeping," Gabby said, curling up next to him.

Filip sighed, despite the smile on his lips. It was nice to share a bed again. Even if he hadn't had a choice in the matter. "You know..." Gabby trailed off, lost, before starting again. "You know I love you, right?"

It was as though someone had stabbed him in the stomach and then given him a million dollars at the same time. His mind went blank as every word that he'd learned of the past twenty-seven years, in all the languages he knew, just slipped away, and instead of saying anything with any sort of intelligence behind it, he just said, "yeah."

He mentally kicked himself for not saying something smarter. Instead, he rolled over to place a kiss on the top of Gabby's head, but she'd already fallen asleep.

* * *

There were two things Gabby was sure of when she woke the next morning. The first was that she was never, ever, _ever _drinking again. The second was that there was an arm around her waist and a warm body pressed up against hers. She froze, trying to remember what had happened.

She'd gone to Cole's with Lucy.

She'd had a shot.

And another two.

That was where her memory started to go fuzzy. She vaguely remembered a couple more, maybe two, shots, and then nothing. There was Lucy and Cole on the couch, making out, getting ready to bump some uglies.

And there was Gabby, in _someone's_ bed, with _someone's _arm around her. She felt her body. Fully-clothed. Good. Hopefully nothing had happened.

But what if it had? She could be have a disease, or be pregnant! What would Bobby say? What would _Filip _say? Gabby groaned, both because she couldn't bear the thought of having to tell him, and because her head hurt something chronic. She rolled onto her stomach, pressing her face into the pillow, refusing to look at the other inhabitant of the bed. If she was already screwed, a few more minutes sleep to lessen her pain wouldn't hurt.

Filip would be crushed.

Yeah, let's go get drunk. Whose stupid idea was that? She was never touching alcohol again. Not after this. Not ever. And speaking of Filip. Gabby sniffed.

She'd know that cologne anywhere. Unless she'd been blind-drunk, and attracted to some random person by scent...

Gabby risked a glance.

It was Filip alright. She let out a sigh.

He looked so peaceful asleep, his face relaxed and free of stress lines and frowns. It was as though he didn't have a single worry. Gabby knew that he spent more time worrying than not, and _she _worried about him, too. But he wouldn't talk about it, and she didn't know what to do.

Gabby didn't want to get up. Instead, she melted into Filip's arms, burying her face in his neck, and prayed that he didn't wake up anytime soon. His body was warm and strong, and he breathed softly into her hair, blissfully unaware of anything. Gabby absentmindedly traced the tattoo on his chest with her fingers. It was of a hundred dollar bill.

Another wave of pain struck her head, and she winced. She'd seen Bobby many a times with a hangover, but always laughed at him and told him to man up. She would never tell him that again.

The arm around Gabby's waist twitched. It tightened around her, then disappeared altogether as Filip groggily rubbed his face. He opened his eyes to a head of hair, blinked in a moment's confusion before pressed back of his hand to her forehead. He chuckled.

"How's the head?" he asked.

"It's not funny," Gabby whined.

Filip sat up, running a hand through his hair. "Come on; ye can't stay here all day." Gabby watched as he got out of bed, stretching. She sighed.

"I'm gunna go back to sleep." She curled into a tight ball, pulling the doona up to her chin, unwilling to face the world.

The doona disappeared a moment later. "It's your own damn fault, so ye can suffer the consequences. I'll take ye for breakfast, and drop ye off at Lucy's."

"I don't want breakfast," Gabby moaned. The very thought of food made her feel sick.

She squealed as Filip grab her around the waist and hauled her out of bed. "Sure ye do. And it's exactly wha' ye'll do if ye don't want Bobby finding out about your night."

Gabby grumbled. "You wouldn't."

Filip set her down. "Ye sure about that?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Okay, okay, I'll go to breakfast."

"Good."


	13. Of Breasts and Snickers

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Breasts and Snickers

* * *

**A/N: **Sarahsoa, Venetiangrl92, Well I Don't Mind, liiddee. Thank you all for your reviews; especially to Well I Don't Mind, for giving me such in-depth, wonderful advice.

Okay, so some of this chapter is from Tig's point of view. I've always thought of him as someone with a chaotic mind, which is what I've tried to interpret. Let me know how I did? :)

* * *

Bobby never found out about Gabby's first drinking experience. Filip had committed to an oath of silence and, naturally, Lucy wouldn't say anything, lest it get back to her mother. There was nothing on Hell or earth that would compel Gabby to tell him, and Cole had never met the man. She was safe.

Gabby watched Archibald as the spider prowled around, stalking the dead grasshopper she'd just put in there. Gabby didn't know if it was a male or female, and she didn't care to find out. No way, no how was she sticking her hand in there.

There was a knock at her door, and Bobby poked his head in. "There's someone here for you," he told her.

"Who?" Gabby asked.

Bobby shrugged. "A woman," he elaborated.

"Hmm..." Gabby went to investigate.

It was a woman alright. Gabby could smell the perfume on her long before she even reached the front door, and she'd sincerely hoped she'd been wrong.

"Gabriella," the woman acknowledged. She craned her neck to see into the house, her eyes pausing on the dolls.

"What do you want?" Gabby asked.

"A little respect would be nice."

Gabby ground her teeth together. "What is it that you would like to say to me, Betty?" she tried, because the woman didn't deserve the title of 'aunt', and it was as polite as Gabby could be to her.

"Jamie and Alisa wanted to see you," Betty reluctantly told her, as though the very thought of it was an abomination. "I told them I'd ask you about it."

"You came all the way from New York to tell me this?"

Betty laughed. "No, Gabriella; I came down from New York for work. There was a spare minute in my calendar for you."

Bobby shuffled through them then, saying his goodbyes as he made his way to his bike. Something about Clay calling a meet. Gabby wasn't really listening; she was busy watching the look on Betty's face as the woman studied Bobby as though she was studying a pile of dog shit on the side of the footpath.

"That's Bobby?" Betty asked. She'd never bothered to meet the person who'd taken her niece in; she was too busy carting Gabby's brother and sister up to New York.

"Yeah, it is."

Betty sighed. "It's a shame I didn't have the space for you," she said.

"I think it was the best thing that ever happened to me. I like it here. Don't have to worry about people _pretending _to like me." Gabby studied her aunt. "When are they coming down?"

"They're not," Betty told her. She held out a piece of paper. Gabby took it. "This is our address. You know; if you ever feel like visiting. Have a good day, Gabriella." She stalked off, leaving a speechless Gabby standing in the doorway.

It was her aunt's last revenge against Gabby's father, she knew. Betty knew she wouldn't be able to afford New York. She spent so many years hating her own brother for being in the club, and now she was taking it out on Gabby. She glanced at the address.

The best she could do would be to send a letter. She wasn't going to ask Bobby for a loan, and it would take a while of saving just to get enough money for the plane ticket, let alone food and accommodation.

Gabby sighed, shoving the paper in her back pocket. It had been years since she'd seen Jamie and Alisa. Years since she'd clocked one or both of them in the ear for harassing her. They were twins, fraternal, and they looked nothing alike, but they had done everything together, from beating Gabby up to disassembling the toaster.

She slammed the door as memories of her family came rushing back to her. The first tear fell, and then she slid to the floor, bawling. It wasn't fair. Nothing about life was fair but this, this took the gold. Gabby just wanted to see her mother, her father, once more. Just once. Was it really too much to ask?

To tell them that she loved them? That it _was _her who'd stolen that ten dollars, so her and Lucy could spend it all on lollies and pop? She could ask her mother why she'd been given dark red hair, instead of her father's black. Or whether dogs could look up, because her father had never answered that question. She'd been nine when she'd asked it, and her father promised he'd take the question to the table, get the boys to vote on it.

But then he'd gone on a run. Or he'd have to drive to some other state, or have a meeting with some of his 'other friends'. And Gabby's question had been forgotten, the answer lost with her father.

She remembered that night. Remembered the lights and sirens. She remembered Gemma kneeling down before her and Jamie and Alisa, telling them they'd lost their parents. The twins hadn't really understood, but Gabby had. She was old enough to know what death was. Old enough to know what it would mean for her and her siblings.

Less than a week later, Betty had come down. Not to pay her respects, or to comfort her brother's children. No, she'd taken Jamie and Alisa, and signed off the care of her other niece to Bobby, a man she'd never met, never talked to, because she didn't believe Gabby could be saved from the 'bikie life'.

She'd lost everything within a week, and been left with a man who she could only recognise as the one who dressed up as Elvis and sang at events. That was who Bobby had been. Just another stranger in a web of strangers. Scared and alone, Gabby had run away to Lucy's, because she didn't have anyone else. She refused to leave her friend's room for three days, not until Piney had visited, told her a story about how him and her father had rode up to Nevada, and they'd had to double up after Piney's bike broke down. When they arrived back at the clubhouse on the same bike, the boys had pissed themselves laughing, falling over their feet in tears. The two never did live it down.

Gabby had slowly began to heal after that, locking away the knowledge of her parents death, and the pain she felt over her siblings, who she wasn't sure she'd see again. Betty hadn't given Gabby her address. She never called or wrote, never visited. So Gabby adjusted. She made a new family while she waited for the day when she'd see hers again.

And then Filip had come along.

Gabby helped him because Bobby told her to. That was the only reason. After a while, she realised she wanted to help him. He was no different to her, really. Sad and alone about summed it up. The both of them were just sad and alone.

When she was around him, she felt like she wasn't alone anymore. It sounded stupid, but it was the truth. She liked to think he felt the same about her, but she didn't really know. She didn't know anything about what he was feeling.

* * *

Tig stretched. He leaned over the handlebars of his bike, watching as a woman walked past in barely nothing. Her ass was hanging out, and her tits were pushed up to her chin. He grinned. The things he would do to her. Oh, the things.

As the woman disappeared around the corner, he sighed, glancing at his watch. Gabby was late. He glanced up at the diner. It was closed, had been for the past ten minutes. He scowled.

Maybe something had happened. Maybe she'd been kidnapped. Murdered. Raped and... Tig scoffed. Nah. Nah, that wouldn't happen to Gabby.

He pulled a Snickers out of his pocket, shovelling it down while he tried not to think about all the horrible things that might have happened while he sat here waiting, staring at women's breasts, and eating Snickers bars.

Gabby had nice breasts. Not too small, not too big... no. No, he shouldn't be thinking about that. He locked the thoughts away with his thoughts about Gemma's breasts, and knowledge of how to remove any internal traces of his DNA from someone's body, should it need to be done.

He checked the time. 10:27. Jesus. What the hell was she doing in there? He was going to wait... _one _minute, before he went looking for her. It was just him being paranoid. He was just thinking the...

Fuck it.

He got off his bike, setting his helmet down, and wandered up to the diner, peering inside. He couldn't see anything, or anyone. She was probably around the back.

Tig circled the building. "Hey, Gab! The hell are you doin'?"

He looked around. Nothing. She wasn't here. She was gone, someone had kidnapped her when _he _was supposed to pick her up Bobby would never forgive him he was dead oh god what did he do what did he-

"Tig!"

Tig jumped, nearly falling over. Gabby threw him a strange glance. "Jesus Christ, I thought you were dead."

Gabby shrugged. "Sorry to disappoint," she joked. "I had to help Charlie with the taxes, sorry."

"Good," Tig said. "Let's go before we're both murdered."

They walked back to his bike, Tig throwing Gabby his helmet. She hopped on behind him and he took off, en route to Bobby's.

The streets were mostly empty, but every now and then he'd slow down ever-so-slightly to get an eyeful of whoever happened to be on the streets, walking past. He couldn't help it. He _had _to look, just to see whether it was a man or woman. Skinny or fat. Breasts or not. Cut or no cut. Mexican or something else.

When he dropped Gabby off, he debated whether or not to stop in at a strip club. Pussy or no pussy. Nah, better not; he had an early morning tomorrow.

"Thanks again," Gabby told him, handing the helmet back.

"No problem. I'll see ya later."

He'd gotten halfway home before he realised that he'd forgotten to tell Gabby to tell Bobby that he needed to be at the club the next morning. Groaning, he turned the bike around, drove back to Bobby's.

No one answered when he knocked. He knocked again, with no result. The lights were still on, and he knew Bobby had a gig, which meant Gabby was in there. He banged on the door. "Gab!"

She was probably in the shower. Inappropriate thoughts came to his mind, so he settled on her being asleep.

Or dead.

"Gab! Hey! Open up!" He was banging furiously now, because there was no way she _couldn't _have heard him.

He tried a different approach; he twisted the handle, opened the door, and walked in.

The dining room was a mess. The table had been pushed to the wall, chairs knocked over and glasses broken. The kitchen benches were spotless, everything that had previously been on them knocked to the ground.

In the middle of the mess, face-down in a growing pool of blood, was Gabby.

Tig froze in shock. Was she dead? Was she alive? Who had done this? What did he do, what did he do, what did he do?

There was a horrible sound, in between a cough and a choke, as Gabby's body convulsed. Swearing, Tig grabbed the phone, pulling it to the ground as he knelt beside her, rolling her on her back. She coughed again, choking as the blood pooled on the back of her throat.

"Oh, shit. Hey, hey, I need an ambulance!" Tig shouted into the phone as he tipped Gabby to her side, not knowing what to do. He placed a hand on her stomach as the blood flowed out of it, pressing down.

Gabby coughed up more blood as her eyes fluttered open, then closed again. She reached a hand, grasping blindly at the air.

"Open your eyes Gabby, come on," Tig begged. "Hey, come on, Gabby, don't die. Jesus, come on, wake up!"

He dropped the phone, ignoring the operator as he lightly slapped Gabby on the face. "Come on, wake up." He tried to remember anything about first aid, before realising he'd never actually done it. He couldn't do CPR or stop bleeding or anything like that.

He felt as Gabby fell still, her body limp. The blood was still flowing, so he hoped that meant she was still alive. He shook her shoulders. "Gabby! Oh, Christ."

He didn't know if she was breathing, couldn't tell.

There were hurried footsteps, and two paramedics rushed to help. Tig hadn't heard them come in. They ushered him away from her as they placed a mask over her face and lifted her onto a stretcher. "Is she... is she still alive?" he asked, wiping a bloody hand over his face.

"She's hanging on. But we need to get her to the hospital, now."

They rushed Gabby out, leaving Tig sitting in her blood, staring blindly at the place where she'd just been as the blood trickled towards the pale carpet.


	14. Of Babies and Chocolate

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Babies and Chocolate

* * *

**A/N: **Thank you to Well I Don't Mind, Dahlia Rose-Marie, liiddee, Karli82, Venetiangrl92 and 1 guest (your review hasn't shown up yet, but thank you!)

The first part of this chapter took a lot of research... Ehehehe. Oh the things my mother would do if she saw what I looked up on google... :D

* * *

Pain. Excruciating pain.

It was the only thing Gabby was aware of when she woke. She groaned. Coughed. That only worsened the pain. Her eyes slowly opened to a pair of worried dark brown ones. She blinked, because her lids were heavy, then shifted slightly.

Filip's voice found its way to her ears. "How do ye feel?"

Gabby just shook her head, her groggy mind unwilling to form words. She tried to sit up, but the movement only sent pain shooting through her abdomen, and Filip put a hand on her shoulder, pushing her back down. "No, ye're not ready yet. Doc'll be back soon, to give ye more painkillers."

"What happened?" Gabby asked. Her voice was rough. "How long have I been here?"

"A few days," Filip told her. He studied her face. "Ye need to sleep."

"I don't want to sleep." She forced herself into a sitting position, the effort bringing tears to her eyes. Her head swam. "Filip?"

He sighed. "You were stabbed, Gabby."

Gabby blinked, as her mind scrambled to make sense of his words. Stabbed? She glanced down, putting a hand on her abdomen. The pain felt about right. "But... but I'm okay now." She tried to recall what had happened. Memories swam in her mind like a pool of tiny fish, and she scrambled to latch onto one.

Filip rubbed his cheek. "Aye. I..."

"Filip..?"

Before he could speak again, a white-clad doctor walked in. When he saw her sitting up, his face broke into a grin. "You're awake!" he exclaimed. "How are you feeling?"

"What happened? Am I going to die?" Gabby rushed. She'd rather know now, than later on.

The doctor blinked. He glanced at Filip, who sighed and dropped his head. "Ah. Right. Well, I'm pleased to tell you that you won't die. The blade punctured you large intestines, so we went in to operate on that. There shouldn't be any problems there. We're going to put you on-"

"But?"

He hesitated at being cut off. "Well, the blade also pierced your uterus, damaging the lining. We fixed it up, so it isn't life threatening, but it will make it difficult, if not impossible, for you to conceive."

Gabby blinked. She'd obviously heard him wrong. Obviously. "I... what?"

She was vaguely aware of Filip's hand rubbing her back as the doctor spoke again. "You may never be able to have children," he explained. When nobody spoke, he went on. "How's the pain?"

No children? The knowledge ran through Gabby's mind, over and over again. No. Things like this couldn't happen to her. She couldn't _not _have children. She _couldn't. _ That was half of Gabby's plan for the future, _right there. _Get married; have kids. Didn't this man understand that?

"Gabriella?"

"But you can fix it, right?" Gabby blurted out, ignoring him. "I... I mean you're a doctor, you fix things, that's your job. You can't just tell me that and then say there's nothing you do!"

The doctor seemed lost for words. Filip put a hand on the side of her face. "Hey, it's alrigh'," he said, placing a kiss on her cheek. "You wanna get some morphine, or something?"

"Uh, yeah. I'll be back in a moment," the doctor replied, hurrying out of the room.

"Ah, don't listen to him," Filip told her when he was gone. "He doesn't know shite."

"And you do?" Gabby asked.

"I did serve as a medic for five months," he pointed out.

"Delivering babies?"

Filip grinned. "When the occasion calls."

Gabby glanced up at him. She narrowed her eyes. "You liar."

"No, I'm serious," Filip insisted. "Screamed so bloody much you'd have thought someone was murderin' her." Gabby chuckled. "Ye know, the doctors told us that Fiona couldn't have kids, and she did. Somethin' to do with a, a funny shaped uterus. I never really listened to all that woman shite, but that's not the point. The point is, _he_," the oblivious doctor walked in at that moment, "doesn't know shite," Filip finished.

Gabby wished she could believe him, but she knew he was only saying it to make her feel better. The doctor gave her the morphine, checked her blood pressure and vitals, and left with a promise to come back and check in on her later.

"Where's everyone else?" Gabby asked, glancing around the room. There were flowers and chocolates on the bedside table, and a tower of empty Styrofoam cups. The faint smell of coffee wafted for them.

"They're at work. Bobby's tryin' to find out from Unser everything they've got on what happened, but it isn't much. Got no fingerprints."

Gabby nodded, picked up one of the cups. "I thought you didn't drink coffee."

"Of course I drink coffee. I just don't like it much," Filip said. He sighed. "Wha' happened? Now ye've woken up, the cops'll be in asking ye questions."

"Tig dropped me off, I went inside, and I was attacked," Gabby told him. She stared off into space as he watched her, waiting. She tried to push the face out of her mind. "I don't think they meant to stab me; they just wanted to scare me."

Filip pretended like he didn't hear. What they meant to do or not was beside the point. "Who was it?" he pressed.

Gabby didn't answer right away. She enjoyed the moment of peace and silence, because she knew the moment she told him, all hell would break loose. "It was Jeremy."

* * *

Jeremy peeked through the curtains. He was surprised no one had gunned him down yet. It wasn't like he was exactly hiding. There wasn't much point; sooner or later, someone would find him, whether it was the SOA, or Darby's guys.

The drugs he took full responsibility for. But stabbing Gabby...

Jeremy swore.

He hadn't gone in there to _stab _her. He didn't even take a weapon! The intention had been to scare her, to make her and her bikie friends help him. But, no, she'd grabbed a knife and that's where it went downhill. He tried to wrestle it off her, as they destroyed the dining room in the struggle. She eventually dropped the first one, and as he went to grab her she lunged at the counter for another.

He twisted her hands so the knife wasn't pointed at him, it pointed on a downward angle. Then she tripped as he slammed her into the table, and they both fell.

Jeremy had heard that you didn't feel it at first when you're stabbed. It must have been true, because Gabby didn't even notice, and went to stand. It wasn't until she unknowingly pulled the knife out of her abdomen, and the blood flowed out, did she notice. Her eyes widened and became glassy her whole body froze as her breathing quickened, shallow and desperate. Jeremy could practically see the blood flow out of her face as she went white. Then her eyes rolled back, and her body went limp as she keeled forward.

He didn't stop, didn't think; he bolted. He hadn't touched the knife. They had no fingerprints, no evidence of him ever actually being there. As long as she never woke, he'd be safe from them. It would've only been Darby's guys he'd have to worry about.

Now, he was well and truly screwed. If she wasn't dead, she would have told them it was him. If she was dead, they'd probably assume, or find out anyway. His only relief that neither the SOA nor Darby knew where he lived.

Not yet, at least.

Jeremy cursed himself. He hadn't needed the money in the first place. It was greed that had compelled him. And now that greed was going to kill him.

The sound of a motorbike caught his attention. Panicking, Jeremy shot up from the couch, inching back from the front door.

"We're not that stupid, boy."

Jeremy spun round, coming face to face with three men. He recognised the Scotsman, but it wouldn't have mattered if he hadn't; they were all wearing their cuts.

"Heard you got yourself into a bit of a drug situation," the one with curly hair said. "What's that got to do with Gabby, huh?"

"I asked for help, man," Jeremy stuttered. He inched backwards.

"And she said no, so ye stabbed her," the Scotsman stated.

"It was an accident."

The Scotsman was livid. "That accident ruined her life!" he screamed. His fist connected with Jeremy's cheek, and he fell to the ground.

The two other men had to hold the fuming Scotsman back as he rained down punches. "Chibs, calm down, man; we need this!"

Jeremy glanced from one to the other. They needed what? He searched for something to use as a weapon, a way to get out. There was nothing.

"Tell you what," the third man began. He was older than the other two, twice the size, and twice as calm. "You tell us where you got those drugs, and I'll let you live."

Jeremy blinked. He wasn't sure if they were serious or not. This man seemed to be telling the truth, but he was hesitant about the other two, especially the Scot. "You're lying."

The second knelt in front of him. He had a mean look in his eyes as he ran his tongue across his top teeth. "How about this; you're tell us where you got them drugs, or I'll cut your dick off, and slit your ass so you've got a nice little pussy. Then I'm gunna make you suck my dick before I stab you in the gut and watch you bleed out, just like I had to watch Gabby bleed out because you're too much of a _pussy _to take care of your own damn business!"

"It was Darby!" Jeremy screamed.

The man clocked him on the ear. "We said _where_, not _who_!"

"Oakland!"

"Who else is dealin' in Charming?" the Scotsman pressed.

"No one! It was just me, but I didn't give Darby his money, and now they're gunna kill me."

"You're lying."

"I'm not, I swear." Jeremy tried to inch away from the man in front of him, but he was caught by the collar.

"Fair enough." The man clapped him on the shoulder before standing. "You might wanna get that checked out," he added, pointing.

It was then Jeremy noticed a dull throbbing in his stomach, as blood gushed out of a gaping wound. He gasped, putting a hand over it as the pain intensified until it felt as though his insides were on fire. He scrambled back, hitting the wall as the blood seeped through his fingers. The man who had stabbed him sat in a chair, watching.

Jeremy's whole body began to shake, as his consciousness wavered, and he wasn't sure if this was really happening or not. His whole body was on fire, and his thoughts slipped from him like fish from a child's grasp. His vision faded to a pinpoint, and the last thing he saw was the Scot's face, and the last thing he heard was 'he didn't deserve a clean death'.

* * *

"Did you see the attacker's face?"

Gabby shook her head. "No."

"Did they say anything?"

Another head shake.

The police officer sighed, as she scribbled on her pad. "No distinguishing features? A tattoo, a scar, anything?"

"I already told you, no," Gabby replied.

"How tall were they?"

Gabby motioned. "About this much taller than me."

"And you tall are you?"

"About this tall."

The woman's eyes closed as she let out an annoyed breath. "I can help you, Gabriella, but only if you help me."

"I've told you everything I remember," Gabby insisted. "They were wearing a hood, I don't know what they looked like, alright!" She winced as a wave of pain shot through her.

"I guess we're done, then," the woman said. "Thank you." She left as Filip came in.

He glanced back at the officer. "Christ, I didn't think they'd be in this soon."

Gabby smiled. "What else did you expect?"

Filip shrugged, sitting on the side of her bed. "Tig said he'll be in soon. He's got somethin' to take care of, first." He sighed. "Gemma told everyone."

Gabby blinked. "She what?"

"I don't think she meant to. When it happened, Tig rang her, hoping she'd get in contact with Bobby, but instead she went lookin' for me. Couldn't really say much else when everyone kept askin' why I found out before Bobby."

"And... how did that conversation go?" Gabby asked. She fiddled with her necklace as she watched Filip mouth curve slightly upwards. Not too bad, then.

"Well, I'm not dead," he told her. "Which is good."

Gabby nodded. "That does tend to be a good sign." Her thoughts wandered, as a question that she'd been avoiding for a while came to mind. "Filip?"

His gaze met hers. "Aye?"

"Who... who found me?"

Filip didn't answer straight away. "Tig," he finally said. "Went back to tell ye to tell Bobby about a meet the next mornin'. Found ye on the dining room floor."

Gabby stared at the sheets. Poor Tig. Poor anyone else if they found her. He must have been terrified. "How is he?"

"I think he's feelin' better now," Filip replied after a quick consideration. He leaned forward to kiss Gabby. "I have to talk to Bobby about somethin'. I'll be round tomorrow."

Gabby nodded. "Okay. I'll see you tomorrow, then."

"Wow, that was touching." They both turned to see Tig leaning against the doorframe. "Real cute. No, I'm serious!" he added, because Filip had narrowed his eyes.

With a final goodbye, Filip left them. "Bye Chibby," Tig said to his retreating back. Filip said something in Gaelic. "I love you too, man." He plopped down where Filip had just been sitting. "How ya doin', darl?"

"I've been better," she told him with a shrug. "But I'm alive. Thank you."

"Don't need to thank me. I thought you were... were dead when I found you. You know, I didn't think you were gunna make it." A soft laugh escaped his lips. "Why didn't you tell me? About that shithead?"

"Because I didn't think he'd come to my house."

Tig let out a sob as he replayed that night. "You went... limp. Like a doll. And pale."

With some difficulty, Gabby made herself sit next to him, grimacing, as she bought him into a hug. He hugged her back. "I'm alive, aren't I? You're still stuck with me, Tig."

He laughed. "Yeah, I guess so."


	15. Of Lamb and Beggars

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Lamb and Beggars

* * *

**A/N: **As always, thank you to my reviewers: Venetiangrl92, medousaki, Dahlia Rose-Marie, Well I Don't Mind, otte1978, liiddee, Guest and BrownEyed-ItalianBombshell. So much love, thank you all!

I must apologize; I haven't updated in about a week. Why? I've been working on a couple of original stories; one that's on FictionPress, and the other that I hope to publish as an ebook. I'd put the both of them as my main priority, and hadn't gotten around to this one, for which I am terribly sorry. But I am back now!

* * *

Gemma groaned. It seemed that all she received were bills, bills and more bills. Who would have thought that a car mechanic shop could accumulate so many costs? Water, power, rent. Plus they still had to pay the septic man. Gemma personally thought it should come out of Piney's pocket.

With a sigh, she pushed all of the papers away from her, stood up and walked to the window. She separated two blinds, leaned forward, and peeked outside. Jax and Opie were messing around. Tig and Chibs were talking. And the delivery man was carrying a small package underarm, heading toward her office. She frowned. They hadn't ordered anything.

Gemma let the blinds go as the man approached. He knocked, and she went to let him in. "Morning." She glanced at the package. "What's this?"

The delivery man shrugged. "I just deliver stuff, ma'am. It's addressed to the manager of Teller-Morrow. I'm told that's you." He held it out for her.

Gemma took it. "You were told right. Where do I sign?"

He shook his head. "You don't need to," he told her. "Have a good day, ma'am." With a nod, he left her standing there.

Gemma took the package inside, sitting it on her desk. She tried to remember if anyone had ordered anything. No. Nothing came to mind.

Tearing open the packaging, she was faced with two items. An envelope taped to a gift-wrapped box. The envelope in question had Gabby's name on it. Gemma frowned. Why was something for Gabby being sent here?

It was none of her business, really. None at all.

But it had been addressed to the 'manager', which was technically Gemma. So she had every right to look at it.

Not her business – screw it.

She tore the envelope off and placed it down, carefully opening the box to glance at the contents. It wasn't wrapped too well in the first place, almost as though it had been done by a child. She glanced inside. Nothing unusual. Gemma wrapped it back up and turned to the second item.

The envelope didn't have a return address on it, but when she opened it to look inside, there were two things; a get-well card and a return plane ticket. Gemma stared at the plane ticket. She didn't even need to see the card to know who it had come from, but she did anyway, just to confirm her suspicions.

There was no way. Gemma didn't dare to believe it. It was even more ludicrous than the time she had – rightly – suspected a relationship between Chibs and Gabby. Obviously this had come to the wrong place or been sent to the wrong person.

"Mom?"

Gemma jumped. "Jax?"

Jax hung in the doorway. "Did you get that paperwork I asked for?"

"Paperwork?" Gemma asked. "Oh! Yes, it's right here." She scrambled around on her desk for the paperwork, handing it to Jax.

"Thanks." He went to leave.

"Hey, Jax? Can you do me a favour?" Gemma held out the present for him. "Can you give this to Chibs, tell him it's for Gabby? Make sure he doesn't shake it, either."

Jax took it. "Yeah, sure. Who's it from?"

Gemma just shrugged.

"Anything else come with it? A card, or a note?"

"No. No, just the present."

* * *

"I mean, you haven't had... _sex_, right? Because as tempting as underage pussy can be, it'll get you into a lot of trouble, you know?"

Filip just scowled. Tig had an extensive knowledge of sex laws in just about all fifty-one states of America. A tiny part of him was curious as to how the man knew it all, but then he would remember that he really _didn't _want to know.

"I'm gunna take that as a no. You haven't had sex with anyone else? Because chicks don't like it when you do that."

Another scowl, another assumption of no. "That's good, man, because I'd have to beat the shit out of you, otherwise," Tig told him. He took a bite out of his bar. "Did you talk to Bobby, yet? What did he say? Hey, how come you told Gemma, but not us?"

If Filip had have known he'd receive such a bombardment of questions, he would have denied the whole thing. Just until Gabby was in a position to answer the questions herself, while he slipped into the shadows and avoided all interrogations. That would be nice.

Unfortunately, the doctors gave Gabby at least two weeks in hospital, and another month or so before she was completely healed. On top of that, _someone _(Filip put his money on Tig) had convinced Gabby that if she walked too fast, bent over forward, or anything like that, her stitches would come undone and her intestines would fall out.

Filip had had a good laugh when Gabby went to the toilet, and had taken twice as long to reach the door as any other living person would, while she held a cupped hand over her abdomen to catch any flyaway organs.

"It's all about trust, you know," Tig was saying. "As brothers, we need to trust each other. We are a whole." He made a circle with his hands. "And within that whole are a group of men who I want to know have _my _back when some crazy wetback starts shootin' at me cause I fucked his wife, you know? I need to trust that you're going jump in that bullet's path and take it for me, because I'd take a bullet for you. I'd take a bullet for _any _one of these people – except for the prospects – because they are a part of this whole." Tig did the circle again.

"Ye're high, aren't you?" Filip asked.

"That's not the point. The point is, if you can't trust _me _with your relationships, how can I trust _you _to take a bullet for me?"

"Maybe, if ye didn't sleep with this guy's _wife_, you wouldn't have to trust that I'd take a bullet for ye, aye?"

Tig blinked. His face scrunched up in thought as he tried to comprehend what Filip had just said. "So... you wouldn't take a bullet for me?"

"Aye."

"Aye you would, or aye you wouldn't?"

Filip just _tch_ed, and left Tig to his musing. He was violent crazy when sober, and just plain stupid when high. It was the same with most of the men in SOA. They were violent, unforgiving. Filip wasn't really much different. He'd killed before, and he'd do it again. It was necessary for some people to die, but that didn't mean he enjoyed it.

Tig had wanted to torture Jeremy, cause him as much pain as was humanly possible. And as much as Filip wanted the boy to suffer, he couldn't let Tig do it, and neither could Bobby. They weren't animals. Filip didn't want to turn into that.

"Chibs!"

Filip froze, hands on the handlebar of his bike, leg suspended in midair as Jax bounded up to him. "Mom told me to give this to you to give to Gabby." The boy held out a box, wrapped in starry wrapping paper.

"What is it?" Filip asked, taking it. He gave it a shake, curious. Nothing.

"Dunno. But she said not to shake it."

Filip grimaced. "If it's broken, best not tell her about that, aye Jackie boy?"

Jax just grinned. "If it's broken, I know whose supplying me with my smokes."

"Little shite," Filip muttered as the boy took off.

* * *

Gabby stared intently at the present. "What is it?"

Filip scowled. "I dunno, maybe ye should open it. Don't shake it! If that thing breaks, I'll kill ye, and tha's if Gemma doesn't kill me first."

"So you _do _know what it is!"

"Just open the damn thing."

"Who's it from?"

"For Christ sake, open it!"

With a glare, Gabby set about carefully picking the sticky tape off. Filip ground his teeth impatiently. "Ye're not seriously gunna keep that wrapping paper."

"I don't know who the present's from. They might be someone important. I could treasure this forever, you know?" Gabby explained.

"If I gave ye wrapping paper, would ye treasure it forever?"

Gabby snorted.

"Exactly."

She placed the wrapping paper on the bedside table, then opened the box. "Oh, wow. Styrofoam. Just what I've always wanted."

Filip raised an eyebrow as she pulled the white cube out, carefully separating them to reveal a glass angel.

Gabby blinked. Filip stared as she placed it next to the wrapping paper, and went about dissecting the box, looking for a card or note or _anything_.

"Well, who's it from?" Filip urged.

"I don't know, Filip, who gave it to you?"

"Jackie boy did. He said Gemma gave it to him, but I don't think it came from her."

"Oh..." Gabby trailed off. Who on earth would have sent her a present? Her birthday was almost two months ago, and in any case there was no one else who would bother. She'd already been bombarded with cards and flowers and chocolates as get-well presents, and Christmas was months away.

For a ridiculous moment she thought it might have been Jeremy, before realising how stupid of an idea that was. The only other person who came to mind was Charlie, her boss, but there was no way he'd go into a store and come out with a glass angel.

"I'll ask Gemma when I see her next," Filip promised. "How's the pain?"

Gabby shrugged. "Comes and goes. Nothing I can do about it besides moan. Tried to get the doctors to let me out sooner, but they won't."

"I should bloody hope not."

"It's boring as hell and the only visitors I get are old people and doctors," Gabby whined.

"So, ye're saying I'm old?"

"You're bordering on thirty."

"I'm twen'y-seven, I've got three years to go yet!" Filip objected. Which was a lie; he was twenty-eight in less than a month. He watched her carefully, then sighed. "Has Lucy still not visited?"

"She came in earlier today, but barely stayed for ten minutes." Gabby chewed her lip. She'd been in the hospital for five days, and as far as she knew that was the only time Lucy had been around. "I'm worried about her."

"Ye've got more than enough to worry about already. I'm sure she's fine."

A woman walked in holding a platter.

"Ye shouldn't have, love, really. I've already had enough to eat," Filip teased.

Gabby slapped him as the woman smiled. "It's roast lamb and vegetables," she told Gabby.

"Thanks," she told the woman's retreating back.

Pulling the cover off, Gabby sniffed. "Yuk. Hospital food is the worst. This is what I'm going to be eating for the next two weeks."

Filip shrugged. "Beggars can't be choosers."

"Unfortunately."

Filip stood, stretching. "I should get back," he said, giving her a kiss. "Get some real food. I'll ask Gemma about that present for ye, see if she knows where it came from."

"Don't come back unless you're bringing said real food."

"I will if I don't eat it all first," he promised, winking.

"I hate you."

"Aye, I love you, too."


	16. Of Notes and Secrets

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Notes and Secrets

* * *

**A/N- **to Venetiangrl92, medousaki, Well I Don't Mind, liiddee, and Sarahsoa. I literally live for your reviews. There wouldn't be a story without you wonderful people :)

* * *

Gabby fiddled with the glass angel, frowning. Filip had insisted that Gemma had insisted it had been sent as it was. No note, no return address, nothing. Almost as though it had fallen out of the sky, and directly into Gemma's lap. Gabby had her doubts, but what could she do?

Gemma was the queen of knowledge. She knew what she wanted, and kept knowledge from _who _she wanted. If she didn't want anyone finding out about the origins of this present, no way, no how was anyone going to find out.

She'd spent a week pressing Filip and Gemma and anyone else who came in her room for information, and each time had received nothing. Gemma was keeping a tight lid on this one.

The door swung open as a chubby nurse with curly hair waddled in, carrying a tray of food. When she looked up at Gabby, she smiled. Not one of those fake, 'I have to do this otherwise I'll get fired' smiles; it was a genuine, warm smile. "How are you feeling?" she asked, placing the tray on the table.

Gabby shrugged. "Alright." She returned the smile, if only to be polite.

"There are some painkillers to take with the food. The doctor thinks you might even be able to go home early if the pain stays manageable. That's good news."

"Yeah, I guess." With a sigh, Gabby picked up her fork and started poking the food. Roast lamb and vegetables. The lamb was dry and the vegetables were overcooked.

"You know, many women are told they can never have children, and they go on to-"

Gabby cut the nurse short. "I don't want to hear it. Every single time someone comes in here they tell me that, and I don't really believe it." She stabbed the potato viciously. "Whenever something goes right in my life, there's always something around the corner, waiting to go wrong."

The nurse's smile faded, and was replaced by the look of pity that was all-too-common around Gabby. "I'm sorry," was all she said before she left the room.

Gabby stared bitterly at the food. She tried so hard not to think about that, and everyone seemed insistent on reminding her. She didn't want to be reminded or pitied, didn't want everyone to look at her sadly and say how they were so sorry. Sorry for what? What did they do to her that they needed to apologise for? What in God's name did Piney do that was so bad he could barely even manage an apology, let alone hold back tears as he blubbered something about her father?

No, this had all been caused by Jeremy. Gabby lost her family four years ago and now, thanks to Jeremy, she'd lost her ability to have her own family. The same Jeremy whose mother had found dead in their house, bled out and rotting not 24 hours ago. According to her, she'd gone away on a business trip, came back, and there he was, staining her snowy carpet red. No witnesses, no leads, and yet Gabby knew who had done it.

She hadn't spoken to any of the boys yet – they hadn't been around – but she knew it had been them. Gabby was torn. She knew that the boys weren't saints, knew they'd probably all had their fair share of murder, and she was grateful and touched that they'd done it for her. But she felt sick when she thought of, like she did whenever she remembered she was basically infertile.

What if they were caught? What if the police thought Gabby had something to do with it, or knew something about it? She would never rat. _Never. _But the police could be tricky, extortionists, and Gabby didn't trust herself to not let something slip, accidentally or otherwise.

She left the food untouched, and instead decided to go for a walk. Technically she wasn't allowed to leave the room unsupervised. The doctors insisted on having someone walk alongside her if she so much as sneezed, and not just in case she couldn't handle the pain or spontaneously collapsed or something; they were afraid that she'd leave the hospital.

It was tempting for her. She was sick of them lecturing her about the lining of her uterus and other women's uteri, and Gabby was more than ready to never hear another word about faeces moving through her intestines and how the acids and mucus in there was more likely to kill her than blood loss or anything else.

If anyone ever had an issue with their bowel movements, Gabby was the person to go to.

The hospital was, as hospitals usually were, hectic. It reminded Gabby of the diner. She felt a pang of sadness when she thought about the diner. As loathe as she was to admit it, she missed it. The people, even the rude ones, and Charlie and Jocelyn. It made her feel that maybe she wasn't as isolated from the world as she thought.

* * *

"This is crazy."

"Is it, now?"

"It's more than crazy. Darby's already pissed at us for offin' his scapegoat. Now you wanna start a war?"

Clay rubbed his hands together, cracking his knuckles one by one. He waited for someone else to speak, but no one did. They were all waiting on him. "One of our women is in hospital, because Darby decided he wanted to sell his meth and crank in _my _town. He started this war, not us."

There was a murmur of agreement. Filip stared blankly. Jeremy might have unintentionally stabbed Gabby, but he would have _known _the shit he'd stir up between Darby and the SOA if she'd agreed to help. Due to the turn of events, however, he'd reopened an old wound that Clay and the boys had spent years stitching.

Jeremy, it seemed, had been partially full of shit. He didn't want Gabby to help save his life. He'd wanted her to help get Darby off his back, because Darby wasn't stupid, wasn't going to go kill the boy. If Jeremy was dead, what happened to the money owed? He didn't get it.

Darby was going to use Jeremy to sell _more _drugs, and _all _of the profit would go directly to him. Maybe then he'd kill the boy. Just maybe.

Unfortunately, Jeremy was dead, courtesy of the Sons of Anarchy.

Even more regrettably, Darby still wanted his money.

And if that wasn't bad enough, Clay flat out refused to pay. No, he wanted to go to war. He wanted Darby's head on a stick.

Bobby sighed. "I understand that – we all do – but why don't we just give him the money, come to some sort of compromise?"

"We need to send a message."

"We sent a message when we killed that boy," Bobby insisted.

Clay glared at him. "We didn't send a message, we got revenge."

"If we just-"

"Let's vote it. We send Darby a message, in _his _town. We find his labs, put on a light show. Yay."

Tig nodded. "Yay."

Fillip considered it. Darby was a prick of thing, yes, but did he really want to go to war? "Nay." Bobby was right; they'd gotten Jeremy.

Bobby nodded at him from the other side of the table, as both Opie and Piney gave an 'aye'.

"Nay," Bobby said.

Happy, their newest addition – he kept alternating between being a nomad and having a charter – gave an evil grin. They could all see the bloodlust in his eyes. "Aye!"

Juice sat silently, unable to vote – he was their current prospect, and while Clay thought him useless, Filip could see the potential. The boy was a genius.

Jax shook his head. "Nay."

"Five three. Majority wins. Darby meets the Reaper. Yay."

"Yay."

"Nay."

"Nay."

"Yay."

"Nay."

"Yay."

"Nay."

Clay sighed. "No majority, no move. We torch the meth labs." He swung the gavel with a _clank, _and they all filed out of the room. Filip followed Bobby outside, lighting up a smoke.

"This is some shit we've gotten ourselves into, brother," Bobby said.

"Aye, you said it. I can't believe that little shite lied to us," Filip spat.

Bobby didn't reply straight away. When he did, he seemed reluctant. "I don't think he did lie."

Filip narrowed his eyes. "What do ye mean?"

"I mean, I think he honestly believed Darby was going to kill him." He leaned closer to the Scotsman, lowering his voice. "And I think Darby _was _going to, but the only reason he didn't was because he was counting on us doing it."

Filip thought for a moment. His mouth opened, closed, and opened again. "Ye think he needed to give Clay an excuse to attack him?"

"I think he wanted to start a war without drawing first blood. He knew Clay would never pay the money."

* * *

Gabby enjoyed going outside. The sun on her face, the wind in her hair. She loved it. And, after spending over a week cooped up inside, laying in a hospital bed, the wind and the sun felt magical. With the hospital attire, however, she looked more like a runaway patient than a girl enjoying the weather.

Needless to say, neither Filip nor her doctor were pleased when they found her, the latter looking as though he was going to break down in tears when he clapped eyes on her. Filip stared flatly at her.

"What the hell are ye doin' out here?" he asked.

Gabby scowled. "Enjoying the elements."

He might've dragged her back in himself if she wasn't injured. As it was, he pointed at the door and glared. "Ye know ye're not allowed go anywhere by yerself, now walk. Next time I'll break ye legs."

The doctor eyed Filip nervously. "How are you feeling today?" he asked as they headed back.

"Pretty good," Gabby replied, nodding. Filip narrowed his eyes. "When can I leave?"

"Well, I need to write up a script for your antibiotics and painkillers, but after that you're free to go."

Gabby's face lit up. "Today?"

The doctor nodded. "It should only take about an hour or two."

"Ye think ye can behave until then?" Filip asked with a scowl.

"I can try," Gabby replied, grinning. The doctor left them as they made their way back to her room. She dropped onto her bed, which wasn't the best idea, as it sent a jab of pain through her abdomen. She internally winced. There was no way she was going to let on she was still in pain. She wanted out of this place. "Did Bobby feed Archibald?"

Filip blinked. "Who? Oh, the spider! I reminded him, but I don't know if he actually did it. He hates the thing almost as much as you do." He sat at the end of her bed, sighing.

Gabby crawled down the bed, slipped her arms around Filip's waist and rested he chin on his shoulder. "And Jeremy?" she asked, even though she knew the answer.

"We dealt with him," Filip answered. He ruffled her hair. "It was a mistake."

"What do you mean?"

"Darby still wants the money Jeremy owed him. _From us_."

Gabby huffed. "Clay won't pay him," she insisted. Clay would never get into bed with Darby; his pride wouldn't let him.

"No, he won't, which is a problem when the only other option is to go to war with him."

Gabby let her arms fall limp. This was her fault. If she had just _helped _Jeremy, none of it would have happened. Everyone would be alive. Everyone would _stay _alive, because they wouldn't have to go to war with Darby. But... war with _Darby_? That was ridiculous.

"Darby deals drugs, he's not like Mayans. He can't just go to war and expect to win."

Filip glanced at her with a raised eyebrow. "Ye know waaay too much about shite."

* * *

The phone rang three times before someone answered. "Hello?"

"Huh. It's been a while."

The person on the other end hesitated. "Who is this? What do you want?"

"It's the manager of Teller-Morrow," Gemma replied curtly. She took a long drag of her cigarette. "I got your package."

"I'll send someone to pick Gabby up from the airp-"

"She won't be on that plane."

There was silence. "I'm sorry?"

"You heard me. I said, she will not be on that plane. You've already done enough."

"I'm not doing this for me."

"I know. But you know where we are." Gemma dumped the phone back on the receiver. She picked the plane ticket up, grabbing it in both hands, and tearing it down the middle. She tore the two halves, again and again until there was nothing left but tiny pieces of confetti, which she dumped in the bin. She stared absently at the pieces. "You've already broken her heart once."


	17. Of Life and Death

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Life and Death

* * *

**A/N: **Thank you to Venetiangrl92, liiddee, Well I Don't Mind, otte1978, Dahlia Rose-Marie and Sarahsoa. You guys are all so amazing.

Ahem. If you all may have noticed, I give my chapters interesting titles. Nothing fancy, sometimes random, always referring to something (however small) in that chapter. I'm going to put the titles of my next chapters to you guys (if you want to suggest something). Anything you want, provided it isn't in the title of any other chapters, and as long as it keeps with the tradition (_ and _). I will use ALL of them (if not in this story, then the next). Suggest away.

* * *

"I've just been so busy with Cole and work, I never really had the time to visit, you know?" Lucy was saying.

All that Gabby could hear, however, was 'I couldn't be bothered'. She scowled. When was Lucy ever 'so busy' with work? She _hated _work, and would use any excuse possible to get out of it.

Instead of voicing her thoughts, however, she just shrugged. "It's fine," she said, forcing a smile.

They were sitting in a corner booth at the diner. Gabby had wanted to get back to work as soon as she could. Even though Charlie didn't want to strain her too much, he was grateful for her help – they were seriously understaffed.

"But you're okay now! Anyway, we'll have to do something this week, before school goes back. There won't be any time, then."

"We'll see each other plenty at school, though," Gabby enthused.

Lucy didn't smile. She scratched her arm nervously, avoiding meeting Gabby's gaze. "Um, well... I'm not going."

Gabby didn't really hear her until a few seconds later. Her mouth formed an 'o'. Not going? Gabby massaged her ears. She'd obviously heard wrong. "What?"

"I'm an apprentice hairdresser now," Lucy explained. "Cole didn't think it was worth me going to school for another year. It's not like I was going to become President or anything."

_Neither am I, _Gabby thought sullenly. She'd never attended school without Lucy. Not for as long as she'd lived. Lucy was the only thing that kept her sane throughout the years. After her parents had died, after her brother and sister had been taken away. After everyone else had given up, Lucy had been there.

And now she wasn't, because she was with Cole.

With a shrug, Lucy stood. "I'm sorry. Anyway, I've gotta go. Have fun at work!" She left, almost ran out the diner.

As Gabby watched as she hopped into a waiting car – Cole's waiting car – she couldn't help but feel she was being replaced. It was a horrible feeling, really. The feeling of loneliness that Gabby had felt ever since her parents' deaths began to creep up on her. She sighed.

"What's up?" Jocelyn hovered over Gabby, a worried look on her face.

"Nothing. Just don't feel too well."

Jocelyn raised an eyebrow. "You don't have to work if you're not feeling-"

Gabby cut her off. "No, it's fine. Really; I just feel a bit sick. It happened all the time in hospital, it'll pass," she lied.

Frowning, Jocelyn eyed her suspiciously. "Well, alright then. But if you start hurting, tell me, okay?"

"Okay."

* * *

Filip watched Gabby as she discussed something or other with Gemma. She looked happy. No – he mentally corrected himself – she looked _too _happy. He knew she was upset about the children thing, but she was openly upset about it. Hell, _he _was upset about it, and he wasn't even sure if he wanted more children. It was too soon for him. He couldn't bear the thought of Fiona's horrified face or, God forbid, having another child, starting another family, only to have Jimmy take them away from him, too.

No, there was something else on Gabby's mind. Filip didn't recall doing anything that might upset her. Had he? No, no he hadn't. He scrunched his face up in thought. Couldn't have been Jeremy – his body was busy rotting away in the morgue.

"You keep thinking like that, your eyes'll explode." Tig gave him a hard look.

Fillip glared. It was probably that idiot. He had a habit of upsetting people with stupid comments. He opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by Clay.

"You all ready?"

Filip blinked. "Ready for what?"

"Let's go upset some Nazi pricks."

Filip followed after them, confused. It was still day. They couldn't just show up at the factory and light it up. Anyone could see them.

Jax had obviously spotted that problem, too. "Clay? It's daytime. We can't go setting shit on fire."

Clay barely even glanced at him. "Who said anything about setting shit on fire?"

They mounted their bikes, and followed after Clay. Filip obviously wasn't the only one who didn't know what was going on as they drove through the streets, but it became apparent to them when they stopped outside one of Darby's pubs. Clay had a mean look on his face that they all knew too well.

"What are we doin' here, Clay?" Jax asked.

Clay shrugged. "I just wanna have a chat to Darby, about that money. See if I can't convince him to drop the debt."

Bobby chuckled. "You can't just walk in there, place's full of his men."

With a grin, Clay cracked his knuckles and strode inside.

"Aw, shit."

"Here we go."

Jax took the lead, and they all trailed after him. Clay took the first man down before anyone had noticed what was happening. Then there was a riot.

Filip caught a man by the throat, throwing him into a table. He turned at a sound, barely avoiding a well-aimed punch. Grabbing the arm, he twisted until he heard a crack, then struck the man in the nose.

He threw his elbow back, catching another in the cheek, before something heavy collided with him, taking him to the floor. The guy was like a giant, and Filip put his arms in front of his face as the guy threw punch after punch. He could already feel the bruises as he struggled to get a leg up to knee the man in the side. It had no real affect when he did, so he abandoned the fight for his face to gouge at the man's eyes.

It worked, and with a scream he stumbled back, allowing Filip to jump to his feet. He left the man's fate to Tig, and rushed over to help Jax, who was being pounded by two men at once.

In the corner of the pub stood a shocked Darby. He didn't join the fight, just let out a sigh as the two groups warred. Even though his men outnumbered Clay's two-to-one, they were getting their asses kicked. He needed to invest in better muscle.

When his men had been overwhelmed, Clay approached him. He glanced around at the downed men before speaking. "I was hoping we could have a little chat."

"A chat?" Darby surveyed the room. "And if I say no?"

"Well I don't really think you have a choice."

Darby considered that for a moment, before motioning to Clay to continue.

"I want you to rethink that money, because I'm not gunna pay it."

Filip leapt onto the bar, watching carefully, waiting for Darby to bring up something he shouldn't.

"That man you killed owed me a lot of money. Now someone's gotta pay."

"That someone isn't us. He put someone close to us in hospital."

Darby cocked his head to the side, like a cat. "Ah, women. They bring out the devil in all of us."

"If you want to get technical," Bobby said, "she's still a child. What do you say about that?"

"Maybe she got cocky," Darby suggested.

Filip's upper lip curled into a snarl. He noticed Bobby's face set, Tig's eyes darken. Cocky? Maybe she got 'cocky'? The man had nerve, oh, yes. But that nerve would do nothing for him when he was facing the barrel of a gun. Maybe Clay should have visited Darby _before _taking a vote. The decision for him to meet the reaper would have been unanimous then.

Darby wasn't stupid, though. It they wanted him dead, he wouldn't still be speaking. So he ploughed on. "People die when they get cocky, so, maybe she wasn't _too _cocky." His eyes rested on Filip, perhaps because his gaze had the most bloodlust. "How's she doin', anyway?"

Working up a mouthful of saliva, Filip spat on the floor. He rolled his shoulders, took a deep breath. Then he lunged.

Tig and Jax caught him by the jacket. He cursed Darby in Gaelic as they struggled to keep him at bay. "Ye filthy Nazi cunt!"

"Chibs!" Jax shouted, seizing him around the waist. "You... can't!"

They threw him back, keeping a nervous watch on him as he paced around, thoughts running through his head. How dare he mock her, mock all of them?

Filip could deal with Gabby being in hospital. Being stabbed. Nearly _dying_. He could deal with that, because she didn't die, and a wound would heal and a hospital bed was on temporary. So, yes, he could deal with those things.

What he couldn't get past was the pain and heartbreak on her face when the doctor told her she might not be able to have children. The way her face paled and her body slumped. Her gaze would drop to stare at nothing as she tried to work her mouth into a smile, as though that would make her seem like she didn't care. He could almost see her heart as it split in two. It was enough to break his. Again.

"Will you at least rethink that debt?" Clay asked.

Darby scowled. "No. I want that money. And I want it by the end of the week."

Clay stared evenly at him. "Fair enough," he said after a while. "By the end of the week." With a final huff, he strode out, the rest of the SoA following.

* * *

"What on earth did you do?" Gabby asked as she inspected Filip's forearm. It was more black and purple than it was skin colour, and the other was no better. Filip hissed when she poked a particularly tender part.

"I fell over," he said, watching her. She was sitting cross-legged on the floor, while he lounged in the armchair. "Christ, stop touching it!" He yanked his arm out of her reach. "Ye're worse than a child."

Gabby scowled. "And _you _complain more than a child." She hauled herself onto the armchair, straddling Filip as she pressed her lips to his, curling her fingers in his shirt. "I love you."

Filip placed his hands on her waist, softly running his fingers on her skin, sending shocks through her body. "I love you, too."

With a smile, Gabby kissed him again, reaching up to tangle her fingers in his hair. She wasn't used to being loved. It was a nice feeling, like stepping into the sun after being in the shade on a cold day. The last time anyone had told her they loved her was when her mother put her to bed the night she died. Every time Bobby tried they ended up awkwardly standing around until one of them left. It didn't much count when Gemma said it, because it either meant she wanted something, or she knew something, or she herself was feeling lonely.

Lucy didn't say it, but she didn't need to. Gabby knew she loved her. Well, she wasn't so sure anymore. She sighed, burying her face in the crook of Filip's neck.

"Wha's wrong?" he asked.

"Just stuff," Gabby mumbled into his neck.

Filip raised an eyebrow. "I'm not psychic; ye're gunna have to be more specific than 'stuff'."

Gabby raised her head so that she was looking at him. "Teenage girl stuff."

"Try me."

"Okay, fine." Gabby readjusted her position so she was sitting more comfortably. "Lucy only visited me in hospital a couple of times, and I've barely seen her since she's gotten out. Apparently it's because she's _busy _with work and Cole, but she hates working at the salon, and she'd use any excuse possible to get out of work. She spends more time with Cole than with me, oh, and she's not doing school this term, because he convinced her it was a waste of time, which means it'll just be _me _at school, and I can't not go because Bobby's already paid for me to go." She took a breath as Filip tried to keep up with her.

"So... ye're jealous?"

Gabby would have slapped him, but someone had beaten her to it. "Did you not comprehend any of that?"

"Of course I did."

"So, then you'd understand that I'm not _jealous_, Filip, I'm pointing out facts."

"Righ', and the facts are tha' she's spending more time with her boyfriend than with you, and ye're jealous?"

"I'm not jealous."

Filip grinned. "Ye're jealous. But that means ye can spend more time with me."

Gabby scrunched up her nose in mock disgust. "Over my dead body."

"Eh, so be it. Least ye won't whine as much. Oof!" Gabby thumped him on the chest. "Wha' was tha' for!"

"You deserve everything you get."

"How about some mercy?"

"Pfft. You don't deserve mercy."

"Oh, is tha' wha' ye think?" Gabby squealed as he tickled her sides. She struggled to get away but he put an arm around her.

"No, don't!" Gabby shrieked. How he found out she was ticklish was beyond her, but it was leverage. "Mercy, mercy!"

"So you think ye deserve mercy, do ye? But I don't?"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" She wriggled backwards, out of his lap, and with a squeal landed painfully on the ground.

Chuckling, Filip grabbed her wrists and pulled her to her feet as he stood. "Come on; I'll take ye out to dinner."

"What, don't want to sample my wonderful cooking?"

"No, ye take too long and I'm starvin'."

Gabby huffed. "Well, that's the last time I ever cook anything for you."


	18. Of Foetus and Fetish

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Foetus and Fetish

* * *

**A/N:** Friends and fans! Venetiangrl92, CupKatyCakes, liiddee, Well I Don't Mind, otte1978, TheKnight000, chibslover, keionisbeast, ILoveAnime89, sweet-on-ryan. Thank you ALL so much for your reviews! I know I haven't gotten back to any of you, but I want you to know how much I appreciate you all!

I'm assuming you're all probably wondering if I died. I (gladly) have not, nor have I abandoned this story. Due to some personal reasons, I have not updated in a while, but I should be on the ball again from now on! I hope you continue to stick with me!

* * *

Gabby watched as the boys moved like panicked ants around the shop. Tig almost dropped a tyre on her toes as he rushed to fix it on a car, Jax nearly blew them all up when he dropped his smoke on the ground, not an inch away from a slick of oil that Bobby had previously spilled, and Filip kept glancing over at her as though she was going to drop dead at any moment, which resulted in him poking a hole in the fuel line of the car he was working on. Even Gemma was on edge.

Of course, Gemma knew everything that went on in this place. Gabby only knew some, and even then it wasn't much. Bobby never told her, and Filip was tight-lipped about the whole situation.

She was smart enough to know that _something _was going on, but just not _what _was going on; anytime there was something about to go down, the boys would get nervous. They'd make stupid mistakes. Even Juice, the prospect, looked scared, although that might have been because Clay had just given him an earful.

"What are you doin' here, darlin'?" Contrary to his size, Piney had the unnerving ability of being able to sneak up on people.

Gabby shrugged. "Got nowhere else to go," she admitted.

It was true; she had the day off work, the day off school, and was unable to contact Lucy. She didn't really feel like reading, so to the garage it was. At least the boys acknowledged her, even if they didn't stop for a chat.

"Ah, well if you're waiting for it to get better, you'll be a while, I can tell you that much." He took a smoke out of his pocket, lit it, and took a deep puff. "You're better off finding somewhere to go. As for me, there's a drink in there with my name on it."

There was no pointing arguing the fact that it was only nine with him. Piney didn't care. Instead, Gabby wandered through the shop to where Filip was working. "What are you doing?" she asked.

"Fixin' a car," he replied curtly. He thrust a spanner into her, and she scrambled to grab it. "Hold this will ye?"

Gabby watched curiously as he pulled out tubes, shoved them back in, fiddled with screws and knobs and leads. He pulled a long, thin bit of wire out. Part of the bottom was black. Holding it for Gabby to see, he said, "Ye know wha' this is?"

"A bit of wire?"

"It's the oil gauge. Tells ye how much oil ye've got. Tha's wha' the black is," he explained, before placing it back in the car.

"You're not trying to turn me into a mechanic, are you?" Gabby asked, fiddling with the spanner.

Filip raised an eyebrow. "Changin' oil is somethin' everyone should know. Ye should know how to change a tyre as well."

"But that's what _you're _for." Laughing at the scowl on his face, Gabby leaned forward and placed a kiss on his lips. "You're the mechanic."

"Aye, and ye're just a pain in the arse. Go find something constructive to do, will ye?" He ruffled her hair with his filthy hand.

"Don't – Filip!" Gabby screeched, wrestling his arm away.

He took the spanner from her. "Look at tha', ye're filthy. Go have a shower or feed yer spider or somethin'."

Glaring, Gabby stomped off to talk to Tig, but he told her pretty much the same thing; find something to do, _away _from the shop. "Fine. Actually, you know what? Maybe I'll go _doll _shopping, just for you," she finally snapped. "I'll fill your house with them, just to make sure you see it."

Filip watched Gabby as she left the shop, looking more than disgruntled. He felt a pang of guilt, but brushed it away. It was more for her safety than anything; they couldn't trust that Darby's men wouldn't burst in and open fire.

Darby wasn't an idiot; he had to know there was no way Clay would pay him. Not even if there was a gun to his head. Clay wasn't that kind of person. He never paid unless there was something in it for him.

Tig's head appeared from around a car. "Gabby didn't seem too happy to be sent away, man," he stated.

Filip lit up a cigarette.

"Chibs?"

He took a drag.

"Did you tell her what's going on, or what?"

Exhaling, Filip was suddenly shrouded in smoke.

"I'll take that as a no." Tig waved the smoke away, pulling out a smoke of his own.

"If I tell her wha's goin' on, I'll have to tell her why it's goin' on," Filip told him.

"You mean with Jeremy?" Tig asked, his face hardening. He was still finding it hard to forget. The blood. Gabby's body, pale and cold.

Filip nodded. "The last thing she needs is to think she's at fault for all the shit tha's goin' down."

Tig nodded. "I feel ya. She said she was gunna buy some dolls, man," he said with a shiver. "I hate dolls. They creep me out."

"Comin' from _you_?" Filip asked. "_You _who practically has a violence fetish?"

Filip had to agree though; he didn't really understand why Gabby had so many dolls. Jax and Opie bought her one for her birthday, but he'd expect her to be over them at her age. And, even though she said she only kept them to freak Tig out, he couldn't help but feel they reminded her of her mother, or sister. He got that; half of his cupboard was full of different types of tea and, though he'd never admit it to anyone, he'd bought himself a floral tea set a while back, because it looked just like the one Fiona owned, and the tea reminded him of home.

Of course, nowadays Filip really wasn't sure where was home. Here, or back in Ireland. Whenever he asked himself, he felt the answer was here, and Ireland was just a bad dream.

* * *

"The usual, then?"

Jocelyn was already scribbling on her pad, so Gabby just nodded. "And something to eat, maybe?" she asked.

"I'll make you a toastie," Jocelyn told her. "I don't suppose you've seen my useless sister, have you?"

Gabby shook her head. "Haven't seen her in a while. Why?"

"Mom said she didn't come home last night. She's been spending a lot of time with her boyfriend," Jocelyn explained.

Despite herself, Gabby felt a bit better. So it wasn't just her? It was Lucy's family as well? She promptly reprimanded herself. It wasn't something she should feel good about. "She might be at his house," she suggested. "I'll check it out later."

Satisfied with Gabby's promise, Jocelyn marched off with the order, leaving Gabby to think. Lucy and Cole were close, there was no doubt about it, but the Lucy she knew wouldn't abandon friends and family for one person. Maybe Gabby didn't know her friend as well as she thought.

When Jocelyn came back with her order, Gabby quickly scoffed the sandwiches and sculled the drink. When she was finished she made her way over to Cole's. One of the perks of working at the diner meant she didn't have to pay for the food – as long as it was a meal for herself.

Cole's house wasn't in the best part of town. The houses were run down, and the inhabitants had mean looks about them, as though they'd cut her for her shoelaces. Not only was Gabby surprised she remembered which one it was – as they all looked the same – she was utterly horrified that she's walked from _here _to Filip's, drunk, not too long ago. Someone could have murdered her.

Knocking nervously on the door, Gabby glanced around. A few people were watching her with mild interest, but nothing more. The door opened soon after.

"What do you want?" Cole snapped.

Gabby blinked. "I'm Lucy's friend; is she here?"

He glared at her, as though he didn't believe her. Then Lucy appeared in the doorway. "Gabby? What are you doing here?"

As she spoke, Cole's face softened, but only slightly. He stepped back to let Lucy past, then wandered off.

"Looking for you," Gabby told her. "Jocelyn said you didn't come home last night, that your mom was worried."

"Oh." Lucy shrugged nonchalantly. "I stayed here, actually, but it's really none of her business. Cole and I were just working some things out." Her face fell slightly, and she rubbed her arm.

Not to be put off, Gabby pushed for information. "What kind of things?" she asked.

"Nothing important," Lucy promised.

"You can tell me."

"Well, no. I mean, it's just that we don't know what we're going to do yet," Lucy explained. She was getting more and more nervous by the second.

"Do about what?" Gabby pressed.

Lucy shrugged, twirling a bit of hair around her finger. "It's just that... well, I'm pregnant."

* * *

If there was something Gabby was good at, it was coping with shock. But after Lucy's revelation, she was certain she'd been given enough shock to last a life time.

Her first thought had been horror. Her second, happiness. Lucy was having a baby! Of course, she was only 17, so both her and Cole would get into a lot of trouble for it, unless they jumped the state.

But, of course, Lucy had gone and ruined all that by admitting Cole wanted her to abort it and that, 'secretly' she agreed with him.

Gabby never really yelled at people. She was of the honest belief that raising your voice achieved nothing besides startling the neighbours. And she was fairly certain everyone for miles around knew that Lucy was pregnant, and that it was probably going to be aborted.

Before she'd been stabbed, Gabby wouldn't have had a problem with the abortion. But now, faced with the prospect of never having children, it just seemed selfish. Lucy had gotten herself pregnant – albeit accidentally – and now had a miracle, a _baby _growing inside her. She had a responsibility to that miracle, but no; she was going to get rid of it.

Gabby refused the thought that maybe it was for the best. Maybe neither Lucy nor Cole were ready. But why should they get the choice when, even when as ready as she'll ever be, Gabby might not ever have a little miracle inside her. She might ever only feel an unborn child kick if someone she knew was pregnant. She might never be called mom or spend sleepless nights fretting that her child's gone too silent or isn't sleeping enough or is crying too much.

She was so lost in her thoughts and anger that she didn't notice the man following her until he shoved her, and she keeled forward onto the pavement, barely throwing her hands out in time to save her face from the cement.

A knee dug into her upper back and two rough hands held her head steady so she couldn't look around.

In a moment of panic, Gabby struggled, screaming, as she threw an elbow back, hitting something fleshy.

Not again. She wouldn't let this happen again. She barely made it out of the hospital last time.

Grunting, the man grabbed both her wrists in one hand and pinned them against her back, painfully. "You tell Clay and his boys they'd better pay up, no tricks, or bodies are gunna start dropping." As a farewell, he smacked her head against the pavement. Not hard enough to do much damage, but hard enough to daze her.

When Gabby was able to sit up, the man was long gone. She rubbed her forehead, while making sure he wasn't going to come back and finish her off.

Whose bodies will drop? And what are the boys paying up? Were they in debt? Did they _know _they were in debt? It would have to be pretty serious if it was potentially life-threatening. Was Gabby's life in danger? Gemma's? Bobby's? _Filip's?_

Gabby couldn't bear it if Filip died. Besides, he'd already been through enough. The last thing he needed was to go through everything he did, only to die.

She had to tell someone, find out if they knew. Of course, Filip was her first thought, but he'd just worry. Clay was the most obvious, but he intimidated her slightly. Jax was pretty tight-lipped about anything club business, as was Bobby. Piney was smart enough that he wouldn't tell her, and Opie would go to Jax. She doubted Juice was privy to any information, which left her one choice; Tig.

Tig was pretty much a pushover when you pressed the right buttons, and she was confident enough that he wouldn't tell the others what she told him, because he didn't want to get into trouble for giving _her _information.

All that was left was to get him into a position where he _could _speak, without any of the others knowing.


	19. Of Dolls and Donuts

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Dolls and Donuts

* * *

**A/N- **Thank you to my lovely reviewers; Dahlia Rose-Marie, Bunnygal83, Well I Don't Mind, lyndaflpn, Venetiangrl92, otte1978, chikkafreak, liiddee (and a guest. Your review has been accepted, but not shown up...)

* * *

Tig was an easy man to catch on his own. Gabby simply asked him to pick her up from work, because everyone else was busy, and told everyone else she had a lift. No fuss, no problem.

When Gabby delivered her last order for the night, she was feeling pretty nervous. Tig was just as liable to freak out if he found out she was attacked than any of the other boys. This would require some finesse, and smooth lying.

"Ya ready, or what? Thought you said ya finished at 10?" Tig asked. He'd wandered inside after waiting a good 20 minutes.

"No, I said 10:30," Gabby insisted. She had told him 10, but it was much easier to talk anywhere but on a bike. "I'm just finishing up now." Charlie had extended the opening hours to 10:30, and was now doing dinner almost every night.

"Right, well hurry up. Got things to do, ya know? Hey, pass us the donut would ya? Here." He handed Gabby some cash, before leaning against the counter with his donut in hand, glaring at all the customers as though Gabby finishing at 10:30 and not, as he'd thought, 10, was their fault.

Gabby made sure the drink fridge was stocked and all her duties done before she took her apron off. She said goodbye to Charlie, and wandered back out the front to where Tig was waiting.

"So," she began, trying to decide the best way to go. "You lot are up to something again?"

Tig glanced at her, his face forming a frown. "What do ya mean?"

"Oh, I get it; 'club business' and all that. Understandable really, but if it's going to affect me then I'd like to know."

Gabby followed him into the parking lot as he scowled. "There isn't nothing going on, and if there was, it wouldn't have anything to do with you _or _that shithead Jeremy."

But Gabby hadn't even mentioned Jeremy. "It's got something to do with Jeremy?"

Tig swore as Gabby raised an eyebrow. If it had something to do with Jeremy, then she was also involved in some way. Jeremy owed Darby a lot of money. Was it possible that his death had caused problems for the club? So _that _was the money they had to pay up.

Filip had mentioned it to her when she was still in hospital. She hadn't thought too much about it since – Darby was too smart to go to war with the sons – but now it seemed important. Darby obviously had something up his sleeve, and Jeremy must have been a part of it.

The only reason the boys had killed Jeremy in the first place was because of her. If she hadn't have said anything, didn't tell them who'd attacked her, Jeremy would be alive and the club wouldn't be in this position. Gabby doubted that Darby had sent Jeremy to rough her up or give her problems at school, but he would have known Jeremy had put her in hospital; he'd also have known that the boys wouldn't be too happy when they found out who and why.

Gabby knew enough about how Samcro worked to guess how the others did; someone drew first blood, for whatever reason, and the other group retaliated. If they didn't sort something out quickly, it would turn into a full-blown war.

Jeremy putting her in hospital had been the instigator, but the sons killing Jeremy was first blood. It was Darby's turn to retaliate.

Was that why the boys were so on edge?

"Don't think too much about it, Gabby," Tig told her. "You figure things out when you think, and then I get in trouble." He held out a helmet.

Gabby took it, but she didn't put it on. "Is Darby going to attack you?" she asked.

"I told you not to think about it."

"Well if it's got something to do with Jeremy, it's got something to do with me," Gabby insisted.

Tig refused to be swayed. "Drop it."

"I'll throw dolls at you."

"I'm not saying anything."

"I'll fill your house with them, I swear," Gabby threatened.

"Let's go, put your helmet on; I got places to be."

"One of Darby's men approached me yesterday."

This caught Tig's attention. He almost dropped his bike. "What do you mean, what did he say? Did he threaten you? Did he hurt you?"

"He wanted me to tell you guys to pay up, no tricks... otherwise people will die," she told him.

"Did he hurt you?"

"No," Gabby lied. She fiddled with the straps of the helmet. "Are you going to pay them? Is it the money that Jeremy owed them?"

Tig refused to meet her eyes. He had the sheepish look on his face that he had every time he did something stupid, like buy her a killer hamster, or chase a feral dog across a busy highway. In that moment, she knew. They weren't going to pay Darby. They weren't even going to try and reason with him; they were going to do something immensely stupid, potentially life-threatening, and that would most definitely be the start of a bloody feud.

"What are you guys doing?" Gabby asked.

Seizing the helmet from her, Tig forced it on her head, clipped it up and yanked her onto the back of his bike. "I told you nothing, alright? _Nothing_."

"But this is all _my _fault!" Gabby insisted, but her words were lost on the wind as Tig screamed through the streets.

When he pulled up in front of Bobby's, he hadn't even stopped as Gabby leapt off the back and bolted into the house, pulling the helmet off. Bobby was sitting at the table, drinking a beer.

"Ah, Gabby..."

She cut him off.

"Don't go to war with Darby, Bobby, it's stupid. Jeremy was my fault; just pay Darby the money and forget about it all!"

"I..."

"Tig told me you guys were planning something and-"

"Now that is a lie." Tig, who'd followed Gabby in, stepped forward. "I didn't say nothing. She guessed all this shit herself, and _I _am innocent of anything she says I did." He considered this for a moment before adding, "Well, I may have mentioned Jeremy, but that was an accident."

Bobby stared evenly at Gabby. "What's going onto between the Sons of Anarchy and Darby is club business. It's got nothing to do with you."

"But..."

"No buts, Gabby. You mind your own business. We took a vote, made a decision, and we're going to stick with it. Don't you worry."

Gabby's eyes were brimming with tears. He didn't understand; none of them did. This was all because of her, because of _Jeremy_. If any of them died or were hurt, it would be her fault. If they were thrown in jail, it was on her.

"You can't seriously think this is a good idea," she pressed.

Bobby narrowed his eyes slightly. "It doesn't matter; club decision. You should have come to _me_, not him." Tig scowled.

Gabby ignored the last part. Bobby would have given nothing away. "And if someone dies?"

"No one's going to die," Tig promised.

"But if they do?"

"We all know the risks, Gabby; we're ready."

Gabby glared from one to the other. "I guess my father was ready when he died. And my mother, too!" She couldn't help the tears as they spilled down her cheeks. "But I wasn't, and I'm still not."

She left them standing there as she fled to her room, slamming the door behind her and collapsing against it. She hated the club, hated what they did. When did it ever stop? The death, the worry? When did any of it stop?

A small voice in the back of her head spoke up. _It will never stop._

* * *

At work the next day, something happened that Gabby wasn't expecting; Lucy visited.

She was still upset about the boy's plans, and teeming from her and Lucy's argument, so she didn't take to kindly when Lucy made a beeline straight for her.

"Can I talk to you?" Lucy asked.

"I'm busy."

Lucy snorted. "No, you're not."

Gabby placed the tray she was holding on a table. "I'm not going to apologise, if that's what you want."

She was being stubborn, she knew, but she couldn't bring herself to say sorry. In truth, Gabby was pro-abortion, always had been. The only reason she was thinking any differently was because of her own situation. Well, that and the fact that Lucy was saying not a year before that she'd have a child on the spot if she could. She refused to believe Lucy didn't want this child. Cole was probably the one pulling the strings of it.

"I don't want an apology," Lucy said with a shrug.

"What do you want?"

"I want you to come with me."

Gabby raised an eyebrow. "Why don't you get Cole to go with you?" she asked bitterly.

"He doesn't want to come. I mean, he'll get into a lot of trouble if he's found out."

"And so will you. Why don't you _keep _it? You've always wanted a kid. What changed your mind?"

Lucy sighed, her eyes darting around. "Just... not yet. I mean Cole isn't ready. It wouldn't be fair on him."

"_Do _you want to get rid of it?" Gabby asked, her eyes narrowing slightly.

"Want do you mean? Of course I do," Lucy snapped. Gabby caught a slight hint of hesitation in her voice.

Picking up her tray, Gabby turned to head into the kitchens. "I'll come with you, when you've really made up your mind."

Jocelyn made an appearance, shooting off questions to Lucy as though she'd had them already planned in her mind. Gabby left them to it, as she noticed Filip pulling up out front. Bobby had probably told him about her meltdown. He did look rather concerned as he approached her.

"Can I help you?" Gabby asked him, her expression flat.

Filip seemed amused by this, and he grinned. "Aw, don't give me tha' look, lass." He ruffled her hair, placing a kiss on her forehead.

"Let me guess," Gabby began. "You talked to Bobby..."

Filip continued on from there. "...and he said ye were borderin' on a nervous breakdown last night. He also said ye seem to think all this club shite is _your _fault."

"Think? I don't think; I know. If something happens to any of you it'll be on me."

"Oh, really? So ye asked Jeremy to stab ye, did ye?"

Gabby blinked. "Well, no, but..."

"And ye asked us to go deal with him, right?"

"If I hadn't told you it was him..."

"Then he'd still be out there, causin' more trouble. Don't worry about us; we'll be fine," Filip promised. He brushed a piece of hair behind her ear before frowned. "Wha' did ye do there?" he asked, prodding a tender part of her forehead.

Gabby recoiled. "Ow." She batted his hand away. Her forehead must have bruised when the man had pushed her to the ground the other day. "Hit the corner of a cupboard," she lied.

Filip snorted. "Well, at least ye did a good job o' it. Wha' time do ye finish?"

"Soon," Gabby said.

"Right, well I'll be back to pick ye up 'soon'," he drawled. "Gotta meet with the boys." He kissed her again, before leaving.

Gabby stared after him. If he was meeting with the boys, it probably meant they were planning their attack. She chewed her lip nervously, ignoring the ache in her that wanted to disappear with Filip, away from the club, the violence and the memories. It was a stupid kind of yearning though; she knew Filip would never leave the club and, as much as she wanted to, knew she never would either.

* * *

"Chibs, what have we got?"

Filip unrolled a map of Oakland. Every so often there was a pencilled in circle, or a cross, or a circle with a cross. This map had obviously been around long before him. He pointed out a few of the circles, ones he'd added himself. "Darby's got a few 'legitimate' warehouses tha' might be worth checkin' out. He's got a large storage warehouse here, for everyday storage and shite. I had Juice check it out-" at the sound of his name, the prospect beamed; Clay scowled. "-and it seems to be legitimate enough tha' if we do blow it up, a lot of people are gunna be pissed. I'd say this one's our best bet." He pointed to a circle near the edge of the map.

"Frank's Plumbing and Sewerage Warehouse?" Tig asked, looking at it.

Filip nodded. Not the most hygienic option, but the best by far. It was away from eyes and ears – probably not noses – and it made a lot of money. If there was ever a place for drugs, it was where not even trained dogs could smell them. "It's the best place for him to make his shite."

"Why don't we just visit the sewers, blow them up?" Piney asked sarcastically.

Jax laughed. "At least we'll know when it's blown up; that's gunna stink."

"Wha' do ye think?" Filip asked, turning to Clay.

Clay inspected the map carefully, weighing the pros and cons. It was an easy target, but they'd have to go through Oaktown. It was probably very important to Darby, but going that far meant more chance of being caught.

A small part of him hoped the president would call another vote, and they'd instead decide to pay Darby; Gabby _was _right. They could die. _He _could die. Gabby would be heartbroken enough if any of them was killed. How much worse would it be if it was him? On top of that, she still thought the whole thing was her fault.

Dead or not, Filip couldn't bear the thought of her shouldering the blame of a death. Especially not his or one of his brother's. He almost asked Clay to call another vote, but stopped himself. Jeremy was Darby's one of Darby's men. And Darby needed to pay for what he'd done.


	20. Of Doubt and Regret

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Doubt and Regret

* * *

**A/N:** My reviewers; Bunnygal83, Venetiangrl92, Well I Don't Mind, chikkafreak, liiddee, Ashley, chibslover and Kelsey. You're all the best!

Now, this story is starting to come to a close. I give it around 5 or so more chapters. Possibly closer to 10. But you are all - regrettably - forewarned. :)

* * *

Filip didn't have too many regrets. He didn't have as many doubts. Of course, every now and then he'd wonder if he'd made the right choice with Gabby.

He didn't doubt his love for her. A million, million girls in the world, and she was the only one who was able to conquer his love for Fiona. He both loathed and loved her for it, because every now and then he would remember his feisty Irish wife. Her name; her face. He would remember their daughter – _his _daughter – with a stab of pain that was enough to bring tears to his eyes. What kind of person was he, that he would forget his own family? That he would give up on his wife for a sweet, innocent girl, ten years younger than him? A child.

What kind of a person was he?

It was times like this, when Filip found himself drowning in a constricting pit of doubt, thinking up excuses to put Gabby on a better path. Away from him, away from the club.

He sat and he wondered all this as he watched a boy through the diner window. Gabby was due to finish any minute now. He needed to talk to her, tell her things that he didn't want to say.

The boy in question was being served by Gabby, and he was flirting with her. Even from so many feet away Filip could tell, because any guy that cracks onto a girl knows it must be done in such an obvious way that anyone and everyone would know.

Still, knowing that the boy was flirting with her didn't tell Filip how well he was doing. And despite the growing lump of jealousy inside of him, Filip hoped the boy was doing well. He was Gabby's age, didn't look like trouble. The sort of boy that Filip ultimately hoped his daughter would end up with.

Filip wasn't actively trying to get rid of Gabby. He didn't _want _to get rid of her, but he knew as well as she did, that he was too old and too dangerous. Even he couldn't deny that Sunday might be his last day alive. He didn't dwell on it too much. Every day he was part of Samcro could be his last.

Gabby didn't need that; she needed someone young, someone safe. Someone who wasn't out getting hip replacements and retiring by the time her kids moved out of home. He knew she wanted kids, but with that bordering on impossible, she might decide to go to uni or something. What would they do? She'd have to move away and they'd be back in square one.

All this went through Filip's mind as he watched the boy's subtle movements and Gabby's bemused smile as she tried to slink off. When she finally managed to get away, she glanced up, noticing Filip. Her face broke into a wide smile as she waved. Filip waved back, then lit up a smoke and took a drag.

A moment later Gabby bounded out of the diner. "Sorry," she said when she reached him. "It got busy, so I was helping out. Were you waiting long?"

Filip shook his head as she clipped up her helmet. "Whose yer friend?" he asked, jerking his head in the direction of the boy.

Gabby followed his gaze and, to his surprise, blushed. "Oh, I don't know his name," she said. "But he kept talking to me. Can you stop in at the shop? I've gotta grab something from Gemma's office."

Filip pay no attention to her last comment. "Probably fancies ye."

"He does not!" Gabby screeched. "I don't even know him!"

Shrugging, Filip turned the key, his bike roaring to life. Gabby hopped on behind him, securing a firm grip around his waist before he took off.

* * *

The fridge was stocked with beer, the pies were almost defrosted, and the football had just started. Yes, Bobby was set for a nice, relaxed and quiet night.

He nuked his pies, smothered them in sauce, grabbed himself a beer and sat down in his chair, resting the plate on his enormous stomach. Gabby was with Filip, so he needn't worry about her. He doubted she'd stay the night at the Scots', but wasn't fazed either way; he trusted him.

The front door slammed open before closing again as Gabby flew in, and mess of tears and sobs. She didn't even slow down or bother to acknowledge Bobby as she fled to her bedroom, throwing the door shut in such a manner that Bobby didn't think it worth the risk to try and open it again.

Well, he _used _to trust the Scotsman.

Bobby approached the door timidly. "Gabby?"

She didn't answer, but he expected as much.

"Gabby, I'm coming in," he warned. He'd barely opened the door an inch when there was a loud thump, and it jerked back into him; she'd thrown a book at it. "Do you want to talk?"

"No."

"Is it about Chibs?"

"It's none of your business!"

Bobby took that as a yes. Even when she wasn't directly facing someone, Gabby couldn't properly lie. "What happened?"

He didn't care if it wasn't any of his business. He was damn well going to find out.

"I told you, it's got nothing to do with you!"

Sighing, Bobby pulled the door closed. Tomorrow at the garage was going to be interesting.

Bobby was the first to arrive the next morning. Chibs was the last, and Bobby sensed that he was deliberately trying to avoid him; he sent the prospect to get some paperwork that Bobby had specifically asked of him; he didn't eat his lunch with the boys like he usually did; and when it looked as though Bobby might have gotten a chance to talk to him, he mentioned something about needing to talk to Clay, and sidled off.

When Bobby finally managed to corner him, he was annoyed, and ready to explode. "I need to talk to you."

Filip lit up a cigarette. "About what?" he asked.

Bobby ground his teeth. _'about what'_? "About Gabby."

Something flashed in Filip's eyes. Regret? Sadness? Bobby wasn't sure. "Wha' about her?"

"I know it isn't any of my business, but what in God's name happened?"

Filip looked confused. "Wha' do ye mean? Nothin' happened, why? Is she alright?"

Bobby narrowed his eyes. He wasn't sure if the Scotsman was lying or not. "What did you do last night?" he asked.

"We ate dinner," Filip said, scowling. "Now wha' the hell are ye drillin' me for?"

"Nothing. It's nothing," Bobby told him. He left a befuddled Filip standing there.

If Filip hadn't done anything – which he insisted he hadn't – what on earth was wrong with Gabby?

* * *

Gabby watched Archibald as he prowled his tank, moving each leg slowly, delicately, as though he was stalking something. She'd calmed down a lot since last night. She'd have to apologise to Bobby for throwing the book at him, and to Filip for running off. Not that he really deserved an apology. The more she thought about, the more she didn't want to. Besides, she already had enough on her mind.

"_Ah, it's fucked. It's all fucked. Clay shoulda paid Darby, and we all know it, even if we voted otherwise," he said, taking a swig. He glanced down at the whiskey, as though he'd only just noticed it was there. "Shite. If I drink anymore of this, ye'll have to stay the night."_

_Gabby almost smiled. But it was still weighing on her mind. "What are you all planning?" she asked, if only to distract herself._

_Filip shrugged, even though he knew. "Can't tell ye; it's top secret." He winked at her, motioning for her to come to him._

_Gabby obliged. When she was within arms' reach, Filip tugged on her arm, pulling her into his lap. He ran a hand up her face, gently tickling it with his fingers as he pulled her in for a kiss. She responded immediately, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck and adjusting her body to straddle him._

_It was an infuriating shame about the age difference. As it was now, Gabby would let him take her without a moment's hesitation. Filip wasn't going to take that risk, however, and she didn't blame him. Not after seeing the mess that Lucy got herself into. _

_She'd scheduled an appointment for next Monday, which meant Gabby would have to miss out on school. She didn't mind, but it would mean some smooth talking to Bobby to explain why she wasn't there, without actually telling him the real reason. That was assuming all the boys were alive; she didn't know when they were doing what they'd planned._

_With the thought in mind, Gabby made a split second decision. She rolled her hips, grinding her groin against Filip's. He groaned in response. Grabbing fistfuls of his hair, she broke apart, meeting his eyes. They were dark and lustful, but she could see the hesitation in them. "Filip..."_

_He shook his head. "No Gabby."_

"_Please? Just the once," she begged._

_But Filip wouldn't give in. "I don't want to have to go through all this again."_

"_What about this thing with Darby?" she asked. "What then? You could die!"_

_Filip didn't answer right away, as though he was trying to figure out the best way to break something to her. A strange expression crossed his face. Gabby recognised it immediately; it was the same expression he had when she'd first met him. The look of someone who was only alive because they didn't have a choice in the matter. "Maybe it's for the best," he finally said._

_Gabby couldn't believe her ears. "The best?" she echoed. "Do you want to die?"_

"_Be realistic, Gabby; do ye really want to spend yer life with someone like me?"_

_He went to grab her arm, but missed as she stood up and took several large steps back. She looked close to tears, but Filip tried to ignore the fact, telling himself that it was the right thing to do. She could be much, much more than just an old lady._

_Gabby was beside herself. She didn't need this, not now. Who else did she have? She didn't have Lucy, not really. She'd definitely lost them, thanks to Gemma. Could she ever forgive that woman? No, she wasn't really sure she could._

_And now, if she didn't do something, she was going to lose Filip. "I get it," she said. "But even if you did feel sorry for me, you didn't have to pretend to care."_

"_Pretend? Gabby, I love you."_

"_Then why are you doing this?" She took a step back as Filip took one towards her._

_Filip managed to catch her arm before she could run off. "I'm only tryin' to do wha's best for ye."_

_Gabby scoffed, trying to pry his fingers off. "Oh, yes, you definitely know what's best for a girl. Get off me!" she screamed, tears spilling down her cheeks. "You don't want me here, so let go!"_

_Surprisingly – heartbreakingly – Filip let go. Gabby waited a few seconds, in case he'd just slipped or something, but he only turned his back to her and said "I'll take ye home."_

_As he fished around for his keys, Gabby took off. She didn't know if he was following her, or if he'd noticed yet, but she didn't care. She was obviously nothing more than a burden to him. If he _did _love her, like he said, then he wouldn't be sending her off. He wouldn't. Gabby didn't understand the minds of people who did that._

_What did it matter that he was 27 and she was 17? What did it matter that he was a member of a dangerous club? Gabby couldn't care less, so why did he?_

_She wasn't bothered by the age difference, and if there was anyone or anything in that club which was truly dangerous, it was Gemma._

_No one person should know so much and have that much power. Power and knowledge was never a good idea. She did what she pleased, when it pleased her, and didn't care who it would affect, or how it would hurt them._

_If Gabby was to be honest with herself, she didn't think she'd ever find it in her heart to forgive the woman. _

* * *

It was a good day, Gemma thought, despite the fact that in two days from now, the boys were going to blow up one of Darby's warehouses. They were all on edge, which was to be expected, but they still managed smiles and cracked jokes as they went about their business.

Gemma placed some paperwork on the desk. She'd filled it out last night after Gabby had given it to her. Of course, it hadn't taken long, but she needed it done so she could send it off first thing this morning. All she needed now was an envelope.

The desk was full of papers. Each drawer was literally sprouting paperwork and important documents. If you fished around to the bottom, you'd find an assortment of paper clips, safety pins, pens, staples and the caps of beer bottles. Occasionally Gemma would find something that someone else had put in there; it was a good place to hide things.

As she searched for an envelope, she was acutely aware of the absence of something. For a moment, she thought maybe she'd placed it somewhere else. But, no. No, it had been in here.

Abandoning her search for the envelope, Gemma pulled the drawer out, sending papers flying as she demolished it. But it wasn't there.

Gemma pulled out the other drawers, gave them the same treatment. Still, she couldn't find it. There was nowhere else she'd put it. None. Which meant that someone had gotten their hands on it.

Trying to avoid the obvious, Gemma cast her mind. Who would want it? Who would _bother_? She knew who, of course, but didn't want to have to come to that conclusion.

There was nothing for it, though. No one else would care about it. Who else, really, was going to take the get well card written for Gabby?


	21. Of Blood and Tears

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Blood and Tears

* * *

**A/N: **Thank you Venetiangrl92, Well I Don't Mind, medousaki, ThexBrokenxMirror, ILoveAnime89, chibslover (for both of your reviews XD) and liiddee.

* * *

Gabby was woken early Saturday morning by a light knocking on her door. She ignored it, because it was probably someone from the club, and as far as she was concerned, the club could go to hell. Her intruder didn't care about that though, because a moment later the door opened.

Filip's head poked in, closely followed by the rest of him once he saw that she was awake.

Turning her body towards the wall, Gabby pretended he wasn't there. It didn't work too well, because he didn't leave.

The end of her bed sank as Filip sat down. "Mornin'."

Gabby ignored him. He didn't get to do this. It was going to take a lot more than 'morning' for her to forget what he'd said. Even though she understood _why _he was doing it, she still didn't like the fact that he _was _doing it. He should know by now that she didn't care how old he was, or that she'd already spent her whole life with the club. It wouldn't do for her to leave it now. She may as well cut of her leg and throw it away.

"I wanted to apologise," he continued when he realised Gabby wasn't going to answer him. "For wha' happened."

"Which part? The part where you said it'd be better if you died, or the part where you pretended to care?"

She heard him sigh. "I told ye already, I love you Gabby. I wasn't _pretending_."

Gabby finally sat up to face him. "I don't believe you."

"Jesus..."

"Why did you let me go if you love me?" she asked.

"Because if I die, wha' are ye gunna do then, huh?"

"The same thing I'll do if you keep pushing me away; I'll move on. Or I'll spend the rest of my life alone. Same as any other person."

"Alone? _You_?" Filip chuckled. "No, I don't think tha's possible."

"Not when I've got you."

"Aye."

"Promise me." Gabby thought it was a little childish, but she didn't care; for all intents and purposes, she was still a child.

"Wha'?"

Gabby squared her shoulders defiantly. "Promise that you won't leave me. Or die," she added, because that was important, too.

Filip blinked, unsure if she was being serious or not. But her face was set, staring him down like only a woman could. He tried to conceal his amusement as he spoke. "Well, I can't really promise tha' I won't get run over when I walk out o' here..." Gabby scowled. "Alrigh'! I promise not to get run over. And I won't leave ye."

Her face remained set, as though she thought he might have been tricking her, or had a 'but' to come. Filip just leaned forward, though, lightly caressing her face as he caught her bottom lip in his.

He _was _expecting her to kiss him back at the very least; what he didn't expect was for her to burst into tears. Alarmed, Filip pulled away. What had he done now? He did what she asked; he apologised. "Wha"? Wha's wrong?"

But Gabby just threw her arms around his neck, half-strangling him as she bawled into his shoulder.

"Hey, don't... don't cry." He stroked the back of her head comfortingly. If Bobby heard her, he was definitely going to die.

Bobby already suspected he was the reason for Gabby's upset – which he was – but Filip was fairly certain there was something else bothering her, too.

"Wha' is it, Gabby?" Filip asked again.

Gabby let out a shaky sob, before she mumbled something long and incomprehensible.

"Uh..?"

"I'm scared, Filip! The last time Samcro got themselves in a war mom and dad... And now Gemma's gone and ruined everything and Lucy's gotten herself into trouble and it's all going wrong," she gushed between sobs.

"Gemma? What's she ruined?"

Wiping her eyes, Gabby looked up at him. She looked utterly miserable. "You remember that angel I got, when I was in hospital?"

"Aye, wha' about it?"

"It was from Jamie and Alisa! Gemma hid the card so I wouldn't know who it from but it was them! They paid for a plane ticket and everything so I could visit but she must have thrown it out!" She burst into a fresh wave of tears as Filip reached in the deep, dark crevices of his mind to try and remember who Jamie and Alisa were.

His mind came up blank. "Erm... who?"

"My brother and sister!" She reached to her bedside table, grabbed something, and thrust it in Filip's hands. It was a get-well card.

Gabby curled up in his lap, hugging herself, as he opened it up to read it. The writing was messy, rushed and full of errors, as though whoever wrote it was in a hurry to get it sent off.

'_Gabby._

_Aunt Betty said you were in an akcident. Jamie said your weak, but he hopes you dont die, and so do I. She said she gave you our address, but you didnt have any money, so we saved all our pocket money for you! We had to get Alex (our grown-up next-door naybor) to buy the tiket, bekause Aunt Betty doesn't know. I dont think she lieks you much. _

_Oh, there isn't one to get back, so you mite have to walk. Jamie says you can sleep in the spare room, bekause Betty dosent go in there._

_Love from, Alisa and Jamie._

_P.S. We sent you an angle, bekause my teacher Mrs W. says that they help people get better, and we want you to get better. She even helped me pick it out._

_P.P.S. We dont know where you live, but Aunt Betty always says about a manager at this place called Teller-Morrow being your friend, so we will send it there. Alex said he'll help us._

_P.P.P.S. Jamie wants to know if you still have ugly red hair (I dont think its ugly)._

_P.P.P.P.S. Aunt Betty found out. She wasnt happy, but said she will pick you up from the airport.'_

Filip read the card again and again. Even though it wasn't for him, he felt his heart break a little more each time. By the looks of the writing, they weren't too old, and yet they'd saved up all that money to buy a plane ticket for her. How much would that have cost them? Gemma might have kept the plane ticket, but even so, it was sent over two months ago; the ticket probably would have run out.

Had that happened to him, Filip would have been pissed. How long had it been since she'd seen them last? Years? And now, thanks to Gemma, she still wouldn't be seeing them.

Gabby must have been thinking along the same lines as him. "They'll think I didn't want to see them. Or that I've forgotten about them. They'll think I hate them."

"Stop it," Filip firmly told her. "They won't think anything like that. I'll talk to Gemma and..."

"She had no right!"

"I know that, which is why I'll go and talk to her. Don't worry about it; I'll pay for it myself."

Blinking, Gabby looked up at him. "Pay for it? What do you mean?"

"Well, ye want to go and see the, don't ye?"

"I... well, _yes_, but you don't have to..."

Filip waved her off. "If two little kids can save up enough money, I'm sure I'll manage without starvin'."

* * *

Sunday dragged by, as Filip watched the clock slowly ticking. They couldn't hit Darby until dark, otherwise they'd probably be caught.

He spent the day thinking, worrying, and going over their plan. He thought he might take Gabby out somewhere nice; he worried that he might not be alive to take her somewhere nice.

The plan for the night was simple; go in, find drugs, blow up building. If anyone got in their way... well, they probably didn't deserve to live, anyway. Bobby and Ope were handling the explosives – Bobby had been doing it for years, and Opie was his likely apprentice. The rest of them needed to find the drugs, make sure no one spotted them, and stay out of the way.

If there _weren't _any drugs then they were screwed, and Filip was in a hell of a lot of trouble. It wouldn't send much of a message to Darby if nothing happened.

Filip was still thinking about what Bobby had said, though. Was it possible that Darby _wanted _them to attack? Did the Nords want a war with Samcro? Darby was still pushing for his crank to get into Charming. What would it look like to the Mayans and the Niners, if the sons waged war against the Nords? Would _they _join in, attack Samcro at its weakest for fear that they would be next? Retaliation was one thing, but starting an unprovoked war was different. Even if one of Darby's men _had _put Gabby in hospital. He'd claim Jeremy was a loose cannon, that he'd dealt with the kid himself. He'd be able to pitch them against the sons.

And while they were busy fighting everyone out there, Darby could set up in Charming.

Of course, Filip had no proof. It was a possible scenario, but they wouldn't know how it would turn out until after they'd blown up Darby's septic warehouse.

Filip put the thoughts out of his mind. It was paranoia, worry. It happened to the best of them before every hit, every run. The doubt. Will I get out alive? Can I trust that my brothers have my back? Filip's answer to both of these was yes. The first because, well, because he'd promised; the second because he knew that any of his brothers would die for him, like he would for them. No proof on that count; it was just something he knew.

When 6 o'clock rolled around, Filip left. He'd been ready all day; armed to the teeth, his cut hidden underneath his jacket. A bulletproof vest beneath the layers of clothing, just in case. If he was honest with himself, that bulletproof vest was the only reason he was still alive today. It had saved his life more times than any of his brothers.

Most of the boys were already at the clubhouse; they were waiting on Jax and Bobby. Filip figured Bobby was still trying to shake Gabby off with some excuse. The thought of it amused him. 'I've got a gig on tonight.' 'Then why are you wearing plain clothes? Where's your Elvis costume? I know you're lying, Bobby; where are you going?'

Gabby wasn't an easy person to lie to.

"There you are!" Tig was approaching him. "I was worried you'd gotten lost or something, ya know?"

Filip raised an eyebrow. "So, we're just waitin' on Jackie boy and Bobby, right?" he asked, lighting up a cigarette.

"Uh..." Tig did a quick mental headcount. "Yeah. Just those two. Anyway, Clay's called us to the table; somethin' about a new transfer, I dunno."

He walked off, Filip following him. "New transfer? We need to wait for Jax and Bobby, don't we?"

"Yeah, yeah, it's gotta be unanimous, but we're not taking the vote today; Clay just wants to tell us about it. We can fill Jax and Bobby in when they get here."

Filip took his seat at the table, where everyone else was. Clay was patiently puffing on a cigar. "Where's Jax and Bobby?"

Tig shrugged. "Not here yet."

"Well, we'll fill 'em in later. I wanna tell you all about a transfer we've got. Name's Kyle Hobart. I don't know him, don't know if any of you do, don't care. He's nomad at the moment, but wants something more... permanent, due to his swelling wife. We'll make the vote next time we have church. For now, we've got business to do."

The door opened just then, and Bobby poked his head in. "Am I late? Jax is waiting outside."

"Alright. Let's go blow some shit up."

The warehouse was empty when they arrived. Tig and Filip went in first, guns out, but there was no one inside, either. They waved the rest in. Bobby, weighed down by a pack full of explosives, was the last in. "Did you find the drugs?" he asked.

"No, genius, we only just stepped inside," Tig replied.

"Find them," Clay commanded.

They spread out, searching the warehouse. Filip made his way to the back of the building. The faint smell of waste reached his nose. He scrunched it up in disgust as he busted open a lock and headed into the basement.

If he was hoping the smell would get better, he was wrong. He gagged, but kept going. There must have been a way into the sewers down here.

Shining his torch around the room, he grinned; he'd just hit the jackpot of all jackpots.

Obviously, Darby and his men thought that no one was smart enough to find their way into the basement, so they'd made no effort to hide the drugs. There were stacks upon stacks of them. They weren't made here; this place was just for storage. When Darby found this place spread all over the town, he would not be happy.

Filip's joy was short-lived, however, as a shot rang out through the air. There was a sharp pain in his side as he swore as keeled over. The torch flew out of his hand, dying with a thunk some feet away. _This _was the reason why he wore his vest.

He took aim in what he hoped was the right direction, and let a few round off in quick succession. A scream of pain told him he'd hit the target.

There were rapid footsteps, then someone shone a light at Filip, who was still lying on the ground, trying to catch his breath. It was Tig.

"You alright, man?"

"Oh yeah," Filip wheezed. "Never been better."

The rest of the boys weren't far behind. Tig helped Filip to his feet as they searched the room, making sure there was no one else in there.

"Well, I guess we found the drugs," Bobby stated, staring at them.

"Imagine how much money this is worth!" Juice exclaimed.

Everyone stared at him.

"I just... I mean, Darby's gunna be pissed off so..." he trailed off. By the look on Clay's face, he wasn't going to be patched in just yet.

"Wire it up," Clay told Bobby. "Let's get out of here."

They left Bobby and Opie to it. "What happened?" Clay asked.

Filip shrugged. "Bastard must've been hidin' when I came down. Didn't see him."

Tig tightened his grip on his gun. "Ya think there might be more?"

"Nah, we would have spotted them. We'll just-"

Jax cut Clay off. "Shhh. You hear that?"

They all strained their ears. Clay was the first one to speak. "Forget about blowing the place up; get Bobby and Ope, we're getting out of here. _Now!_"

In the distance, they could hear the faint scream of a siren. The longer they listened, the louder it got.

* * *

Gabby sat by the phone, waiting. Bobby had told her he was simply going to a gig, but she wasn't an idiot; they were up to something. They were definitely up to something.

She'd tried ringing Filip, Tig and even Jax, but none of them had answered. So, her suspicions confirmed, she waited by the phone. If anything happened, someone would ring.

She sighed. Her and Filip had worked things out, but she still hadn't spoken to Gemma, and neither had he. Gabby was quite content to never speak to the woman again, but that probably wasn't an option. The thought that she could have visited her brother and sister made her feel sick with nerves. What did they look like now? Were they still the mischievous children she remembered, or had they changed? How was school going? Did _they _have friends, like Gabby never did? All these questions that she wanted to ask, but she didn't know if she'd ever get the chance. Just like she would never be able to ask her father whether or not dogs could look up. She wasn't even sure if he'd forced the boys to vote on it at church like he'd promised. She'd have to ask.

The shrill ringing of the phone jerked her back to the present. Gabby tore it off the table and slammed it to her ear. "Hello? What happened?"

"Hey, darlin'." It was Tig.

"What happened, Tig? Is everyone alright?"

"Well, the good news is no one's died."

"And the bad news?"

"Most of us got busted."

* * *

The room was silent, which was exactly how Darby liked the world to be when he was in a bad mood. And he was in a bad mood. He'd had enough of fucking idiots, fucking police and fucking Samcro. If he ever wanted anything done, he had to do it all himself.

The only good thing that had come out of any of this was that most of Samcro had been picked up by the cops. If they went to prison, he had free reign of Charming. Of course, they _had _just broken into his warehouse, killed one of his men.

Which might not have happened if the rest of his men weren't so useless. "I told you to _watch _the place, didn't I?"

Warner's whole body trembled. He and his crew were meant to be there, but they'd gone off – just for a minute – to find some pussy. "Maybe if you hadn't asked them for the money," he suggested.

Darby's eyes narrowed. Not only was the man an idiot, but he had a mouth on him, too. "What's the one thing any successful business needs?" he asked.

Warner blinked. "Uhh..."

"Money, you idiot. And tell me, how am I supposed to get my money if I pardon a crew every time they kill one of my men?"

"Well, Jeremy did put one of their old ladies in hospital."

"She's not an old lady, she's a girl. Useless prick couldn't even do that properly," Darby grumbled. "Now I've got no money, and the sons trying blow my shit up. Can you see why I'm so _pissed off _that you lot can't even do a simple job!"

"It won't happen again."

"No, it won't, because you're going to finish off the job Jeremy couldn't."

"What do you mean?" Warner asked, frowning.

"I made it clear to them that people would die if they didn't deliver. I want you to find the girl, and I want you to kill her."


	22. Of Prison and Precious

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Prison and Precious

* * *

**A/N:** Venetiangrl92, ILoveAnime89, chibslover (yes; Filip felt pretty bad about it; also, we shall see), Dahlia Rose-Marie, otte1978. Thanks for all your reviews!

* * *

Gabby stared around the room. She had never before been in a building that was so impeccably white. Everything from the lightshades to the chairs were snowy. It was enough to send anyone blind. Next to her, Lucy sat, picking at her cuticle until they bled. She glanced nervously up each time one of the nurses came out, as though when her name was called, she'd go off and never be seen again.

In all honesty, Gabby was a little disappointed in her. Not because she was getting an abortion. Not because she rarely had the time for Gabby anymore. No, it was because Gabby thought, deep down, that Lucy wanted this baby. Like, _really _wanted it. And she thought that it was only her love for Cole that had bought her here; if she had the baby, not only would she get into trouble, but Cole would too. He might even go to jail.

Lucy had always been the strong one out of the two, Gabby wouldn't deny it. Now it was almost as though their roles were reversed; Lucy had become the doormat, and Gabby was slowly getting stronger, more confident. That was all thanks to Filip; Lucy's problem was due to Cole.

"Are you sure about this?" Gabby asked.

Lucy nodded slowly. "I'm... I'm sure."

Gabby wasn't convinced, but she didn't say anything else. She'd promised Lucy she'd come along, that she'd be there for her, and that's what she would do. It had been hard enough for her to push the worry for the boys out of her mind, or her anger at Gemma.

The boys had been granted bail – if they could scrounge up the money – but they were all looking at 14 months, _at least_. They were being charged with carrying a loaded firearm in public, _and _being felons, with guns. Tig had said that it was 'a good thing they didn't actually search the building'.

Tig, Ope and Juice had been lucky; not realising that their brothers had been caught, they'd fled. When Clay found out, he said it was just as well, because someone needed to run the club while the rest of them rotted in jail.

"Anyway, Cole says it's probably the best idea," Lucy told her.

Gabby sighed. "I'm sure he thinks that."

"Lucy?"

The nurse was a young woman with a kind face. She beckoned for Lucy to follow her. "I guess I'll be back," she said, glancing at Gabby.

"I'll be here," Gabby promised, as Lucy's back disappeared from view.

How long did it take? A few minutes? A few hours? Gabby supposed she'd find out.

Lucy reappeared less than a minute later, her face streaked with tears. Gabby blinked; surely it wouldn't be over that quick. "I can't do it," Lucy told her. She shrugged, wiping her eyes. "I can't. I...I got in there, and they started explaining how it was going to work and I couldn't. I'm sorry. I dragged you here for no reason."

"It's okay." Gabby suppressed a smile. At least one good thing would happen in the next year. "So you're sure about this?" She knew the answer would be yes, but she knew Lucy needed to hear herself say it.

Smiling through her tears, Lucy said, "Yes. Mom's gunna shoot me."

* * *

"You're free to go boys; for now, at least."

The words were like music to Filip's ears. Gemma had put together enough money to bail them all out, so they were free until their trial.

The trial was in two weeks, and he knew as well as the rest of them that they were screwed. There was no way they could worm their way out of the felon with a firearm charges, because they were all felons, and they were all carrying firearms. Rosen was going to try and fight the other weapons charges though; there was no way Darby was going to charge them with trespassing, so they could argue the fact that they weren't in public; they were on private property.

Even so, Filip didn't like their chances.

One year, minimum, was what Rosen had promised them. Maximum? Well, that depended on whether or not the judge was willing to drop the second charge. That was, what, four years? Six?

Would Gabby wait for him if he was locked up for six years? Did he expect her to? Did he _want _her to? Gabby would be pushing 25 by the time he got out. How much in life would she miss out on if she waited for him? Filip liked to think that she would wait, but on the same token, didn't want her to have to.

He worried about this all the way to the clubhouse, where Gabby was sitting at one of the benches, waiting. She hadn't noticed him yet.

The rest of the boys were heading inside, in search of some alcohol or pussy or something. Filip crept up behind Gabby. He wasn't too good a stealth, but even so, she didn't notice him until he snuck a hand around her waist and lifted her into the air.

Gabby let out a small squeal of surprise as Filip laughed. "Filip! Put me down!"

Filip set her on her feet, and she spun around to hug him, stretching on her toes to place a kiss on his lips, before burying her face in his shoulder. "Tig told me you were all arrested," she mumbled.

"Aye, tha' sounds abou' right."

"You're going to jail, aren't you?" Gabby asked, making eye contact with him.

He didn't even need to answer. The look on his face was enough confirmation for Gabby. She loosened her hold on him, dropping her head. They were all going to jail, because of her. If only she could take it all back. If only she hadn't told them who'd attacked her, none of this would have happened.

Filip grabbed her by the shoulders, pushing her back a bit. "Wha' are ye thinkin'?" he asked, watching her closely.

Gabby shrugged.

If she told him, he'd just reject, say it was bound to happen anyway, even if Jeremy hadn't happened. He'd say whatever he had to so she would feel better, and then they'd all be locked away anyway. They wouldn't have killed Jeremy if he hadn't attacked her, drugs or no. They'd have given him a beating and sent him on his merry way.

"Tell me," Filip pressed.

"Alright, fine," Gabby said, seeing no way out of it. "I'm thinking maybe I said too much back in the hospital."

"Gabby..."

"If I hadn't said anything, none of you would be in this situation..."

"This isn't yer fault, Gabby."

Gabby talked over him. "You're going to _jail_, Filip. You _all _are. And that wouldn't have happened if Jeremy wasn't killed. And he'd still be alive if I hadn't told you what he'd done, wouldn't he?"

"Don't do this to yerself."

"_Wouldn't he_?"

Filip sighed. "Aye, probably."

"So whose fault is it, then?"

"I don't know," Filip said with a shrug. "But I know it isn't yers. Ye can twist it whatever way ye want, but it'll never be yer fault. We were bound to get caught with guns at some point, anyway."

Of course they were; Gabby knew that. She wasn't talking so much about the _guns_, though. What was it that man had told her the other day? If Samcro didn't deliver, bodies would start dropping?

Surely the boys would be safe in jail, so that left, who? Her, Gemma, Tig, Opie and Juice. Maybe with the others in jail, Tig and Opie would decide to pay the money. If they patched Juice in while Clay was in jail – which was probably the only way the boy would ever be patched in – he'd vote to pay, wouldn't he? All they'd need then was the money.

A new thought struck Gabby. If – no, not if, _when _– Bobby went to jail, how was she going to live? _Where _would she live? If the boys couldn't pay off their mortgages, what happened to their houses?

Gabby knew what had happened to _their _house after her parents died; it had been sold off, and the money split between her and her siblings. The same had happened with most of their parent's belongings. Yes, Gabby had a small fortune in a bank account that was inaccessible until she turned 18. She frequently forgot about it because she couldn't access it, but it was there, waiting to be spent. She figured she could live off that once she turned 18.

When the boys got out of prison, she could move in with Filip. Well, if he wanted her to; she'd have to ask, first.

Filip was still watching her, so she figured now was a good a time as any to ask. "CanImoveinwithyou?" she gushed.

Filip blinked. "Ye wha'?"

"Can I move in... with you? When you get out?"

"Uhh... If I'm still alive after Bobby's through with me, then I guess ye can."

"Well, Bobby's already teaching himself how to cook, so he's pretty much ready for it," Gabby said, smiling. She kissed him again, running her fingers through his hair. There was one thing she wanted before he went away, and she was going to try her best to get it.

* * *

As the boys had planned a party for that night – one of the horrible, drunken, naked-women ones that Gabby refused to attend – she had the house to herself. She made lasagne, which always tasted better the next day, and snuggled in her bed with a book.

Reading always took her mind off things, no matter what it was; Gemma, the boys going to jail, Gemma, Lucy and her growing bub, Gemma, her brother and sister, or Gemma. She still hadn't talked to the woman. With everything that was going on, she figured it was a good time – it was never a good time, but now was less the best time than usual. The boys had important things to do such as getting laid, and Gemma needed time to mourn and yell and complain about the justice system.

These were the times when Gabby was glad she wasn't directly involved with the club; she didn't have to worry so much, and wasn't expected to cook and clean for the boys when they had get-togethers.

Gabby had just reached the last page of her book when there was a knock at the door. She considered ignoring it, but reasoned it might have been important. Putting her book and dinner down, she went to answer it.

The man was unfamiliar to her. His hair was short, is eyebrows bulging over his dark, narrowed eyes. An assortment of tattoos covered both arms. Obviously, he was looking for Bobby.

"Um... Bobby isn't home right now," Gabby told him. "Do you want me to-"

"I'm not here for Bobby," the man said.

"Oh." It was only then Gabby noticed the butt of a gun poking out his side, and the way his booted foot was already in the doorway, in case she tried to slam it shut. "Um... who are you looking for?" she asked, because she liked to hope she was wrong.

The man's face broke into a sneer. "You, girl."

He shoved her in, clamping a hand over her mouth as he pulled the door closed. "One word and you're gunna wish you'd never been born," he snarled.

Gabby's heart thumped in her chest. What was she going to do? What was _he _going to do? If he was going to kill her, why didn't he do it now?

_Oh, God_. He was dragging her into one of the bedrooms; the spare. Throwing her heavily on the bed, he pulled out his gun, cocking it. "Jeremy never could do a good job of things. He was a useless little fuck, and now I've got to clean up his mess."

He took a step toward Gabby, and she shrunk into the wall. He was blocking the doorway, but if she smashed the window, she could get out that way. She looked around the room for something to break it with. Nothing; she'd have to punch it or something.

"We told you to pass on that message; if Samcro didn't deliver, people would get hurt. Obviously you don't make too much of a dent in their minds and hearts. Maybe the queen bee will. What's her name again? _Gemma_? She'll be next." He took another step forward. "But then I thought, even if your death doesn't worry them, maybe they'll worry for their precious mother Gemma if they think the same thing that happened to you, will happen to her."

He was at the foot of the bed now, looming over Gabby as he loosened his belt. Before he could grab her, Gabby lunged for the window, striking it with her elbow. The glass smashed as pain shot up her arm, and she was halfway out of it when a hand caught her ankle, hauling her back in. Gabby screamed, but he just clamped her mouth shut, and started tearing at her clothes.

Gabby had never been so frightened before. Not when Jeremy was around, not when he tried to kill her. Never. He was going to rape her and kill her, so Bobby could find her naked, mangled body, just weeks before their trial. Would they be able to attend her funeral? She didn't want to think about it. She didn't want to think about the look on Filip's face, but she couldn't help it.

She remembered something very stupid; childish even. When she'd forced Filip to promise he wouldn't die. He never once mentioned that it was stupid, or childish; he'd just promised, and that was that. Maybe he was going to jail, but at least he was still alive. The least Gabby could do was be alive as well.

The man weighed her down, and though she kicked and hit and squirmed with all her might, she couldn't get him off her. She grabbed the hand that was over her mouth, pulling at it. Not enough to completely remove it, but enough so that she could bite into his finger, hard.

He screamed, trying to pull it away from her, succeeding with a loud crack. Gabby scrambled out from underneath him, kicking out at him as he tried to get a hold on her. His ragged nails scraped her bare legs as she fled into the hall.

A hand caught her hair, throwing her painfully to the ground, and the weight was on her again. Gabby saw a flash of silver as he went to aim the gun at her head.

Grabbing his hand, she twisted it, headbutting him in the nose. They struggled, him tearing at her hair as she held firmly onto his other hand, trying to keep the gun pointed away from her.

There was a loud _bang, _which Gabby knew must have woken at least half the country, followed by a ringing in her ears. She crawled backwards, away from the stunned man, but he didn't chase after her. He didn't move, didn't speak, didn't do anything. Gabby watched him for a moment, as a pool of red seeped out of his neck, slowly growing.

She screamed, clapping her hand over her mouth. "Oh God, oh my God. I didn't... I... didn't... God..."

The man still didn't move, not even when Gabby scurried to grab the phone. She dialled the number, keeping as far away from the body as she could while she sobbed.

"Yeah?"

"Tig?"

There was a pause. "Gabby? What's up?"

"Can you... I need... help."

"What's wrong, what happened?"

"It was an accident; I didn't mean to I swear, please help, OH MY GOD!" Gabby screamed, as the man's arm twitched. "He's moving, it's moving... oh God, Tig you have to help me, _please _help me Tig!"

"Alright, just calm down; I'll get Bobby and-"

"No! No, don't get _anyone _Tig please just help me!"

"Okay, I'm on my way now, alright?"

"He's dead Tig, he's not moving. Oh my God, I killed him!"


	23. Of Dirt and Ditches

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Dirt and Ditches

* * *

**A/N:** Thank you to all of my lovely reviewers!

I'd just like to tell you all that (because this story is coming to a close) I've started another one, while taking a break from torturing poor Gabby. It's not really a romance (but sort of is), again with Chibs; it's completely unrelated to this story, and will be called **Red for Love, Red for Blood, Red for Death.** Hopefully I'll have a chapter up today. :) Thanks again to you all!

* * *

Leaning against the kitchen bench, arms firmly across his chest, Tig was desperately fighting the urge to piss himself laughing – Gabby was fighting the urge to burst into another fit of uncontrollable tears. She was covered in blood; some of it hers, from where the glass had shredded her arms, torso and legs, and some of it the man's, from where she'd bit through his hand and shot him in the neck. The body on the floor was pale and stiff, the ground covered in blood. Gabby let out a sob.

It wasn't funny, not really. But it was. Tig had honestly – like, _honestly_ – thought that, when Gabby rang him up in hysterics, she was talking about her pet spider. He figured that it had escaped, she'd whacked it with a shoe, but it was still twitching around, like spiders do, while she curled up on a chair and bawled. That was what he'd expected to walk in to. Instead, he'd come across a hysterical, bawling Gabby, drenched in blood and half naked, and the body of one of Darby's men bleeding out on the floor.

"So... tell me again what happened?" Tig asked. Gabby had tried to tell him, but he hadn't caught much besides 'oh God, I've killed him' and 'it was an accident'.

"I was... he attacked me and I... I... it was an accident, I didn't mean to I swear!"

Tig sighed. She didn't have to plead her innocence to him; he knew Gabby wouldn't hurt a fly, and he wasn't exactly a saint himself.

"Right, well I'mma take you up to the hospital, I'll call the guys and-"

"No!" Gabby screamed. "No you can't tell anyone, Tig, you have to promise me!"

"But..."

"Promise!"

Tig's mouth opened, then closed again. He couldn't exactly _not _tell anyone. But the look on Gabby's face was so scared, so desperate. "I mean..." he trailed off. "How are we..." he stopped himself. "What about..?" He motioned to Gabby, waving his hands up and down like a temperamental elevator. "And I think even Bobby'll notice the broken window and the blood, Gabby. And him, he's one of Darby's; we _have _to tell Clay and the others."

"Please, Tig, _please_."

"The rest of us could be in danger," Tig pointed out.

Gabby's face set into a scowl. "Well that's a given, seeing as you lot messed up whatever is was you did last night; _look at this_! You can't tell Bobby or, or Filip what happened, Tig, you can't! It's the last thing they need right now."

Tig thought for a moment. She _was _right, in a way. If Bobby and Chibs were to find out about it they'd both fly off the rails, which wasn't a good thing, especially considering they were out on bail. And if they found out exactly what this man was trying to do to her... well... there definitely _would _be a war. That wouldn't bode well for him when he only had Opie and the prospect on the outside to protect everyone. As it was, the lot of them could barely protect Gabby, let alone just three.

But what if Gemma was in trouble, too? And Danae or Deborah or whatever the hell Opie's girlfriend's name was? Hell, even some of the more potent crow eaters could be in danger. Could Tig bear it if he never got to slap Tracey's ass again?

Yeah, he probably could.

But that was beside the point; he couldn't say _nothing_. They needed to be warned, at the very least. "Okay, here's what we're gunna do. I'm gunna get the prospect, and he'll take you to the hospital."

"But they'll call Bobby; they _have _to call him! And then everyone will know!"

Tig nodded. "That's right."

"I don't want everyone to know Tig, that's why I called you!"

"Okay, fine; we'll call Chibs and he can... what?" Gabby was giving him a deathly glare. He was giving her an ultimatum, and she knew it. "Look, it's either I call Chibs, or we take you to the hospital. Your choice."

"It's not much of a choice," Gabby told him. She sighed when he didn't budge. "Call... call Filip."

Nodding, Tig pulled out his phone.

Hugging her knees to her chest, Gabby stared at the body. She'd just killed someone. Sure, it had been an accident, but he was _dead_. What if she was caught? Would she go to jail? For how long? No, Tig and Filip wouldn't let that happen, would they? She hoped not.

Murderer.

The word rang through her mind, clear and sharp.

No. She _wasn't _a murderer. It had been self-defence. It was either her, or him. Either way, there was still a body, and she was still the reason for it. She had killed the man, which made her a murderer, no matter how she put it.

"At least I fit in now," she joked. Neither of them laughed. She looked up at him. "I didn't mean to, Tig, I really didn't."

"I know, doll, I know. But it was you or him, right?"

Gabby nodded.

"So you made the same decision any of us would have. Don't stress about it."

He grabbed a tea-towel from the bench and crouched down next to her. Most of her cuts had stopped bleeding, probably wouldn't need medical attention, but her elbow was pissing out blood, and she held it at a funny angle. He wrapped the tea-towel tightly around it.

There was a knock at the door. Tig and Gabby looked at each other. "He can't be here yet," Gabby said.

"Well that gun went off might've scared the neighbours. Might be the police. You'll have to answer it."

"I can't answer it! Look at me! Look at that!"

"I'm sure it'll go down even better if he bursts in here; put some clothes on and answer it!"

"_You _answer it!"

"I don't live here!" Tig rushed to the lounge, where a pile of clean washing was waiting to be ironed. He grabbed a hoodie and trousers, tossing them to Gabby. "If he bursts in here, we're both screwed."

Gabby shoved the clothes on, wiped her face of tears and blood, and went to the door. She opened it a crack, to find Unser standing there. "Uh, hey, Gabby."

"Hi," Gabby managed.

He tried to glimpse inside, but the door wasn't open wide enough. "Is Bobby home?"

Gabby shook her head. "No; just me."

"I see. Got a phone call; neighbours said they heard a gunshot," he explained.

There were indeed a few curious bystanders. Most of them were peeking through their curtains, but a few had been brave enough the step outside.

"Yeah, I heard that. Don't know what it was."

"Mind if I step inside for a moment?"

Gabby panicked. "Wh... why? There's nothing in here."

Unser shrugged. "Well if there's nothin' in here, you got nothin' to worry about."

Before Gabby could protest, he nudged past her. She was too weak to fight back, so just let him in, preparing for the worst. It didn't take him long to find Tig, hovering over the body, and she prepared herself for shackles and a five to life. "Aw, Jesus Christ."

Gabby sank to the floor, pushing her back against the kitchen bench, which Tig leapt up onto, apparently unfazed by the sudden forced appearance of the chief. "I know; pretty bad, huh?"

"What'd you do?" Unser asked, turning to Tig.

Tig shrugged. "He shot himself in the neck. Hey, look, I'd appreciate it this didn't reach Clay, you know? Or the police department or anything like that."

Unser just stared from Tig to Gabby to the body.

There was the sound of more footsteps, and Filip appeared. His eyes widened as he scanned the room. "What the hell happened here?"

"That's what I'd like to know," Unser piped up.

"Never mind that now. You," he pointed to Filip, who raised an eyebrow, "fix her up. You help me with this."

* * *

Gabby sat unnaturally still as Filip stitched up her worst wounds. If it was supposed to hurt, she didn't feel it; she was still in shock over what had happened, and her whole body felt numb. Filip was silent as he went, rhythmically working; douse it in alcohol, stitch it up, cover it with a bandaid, bandage it up. She was lucky enough that only a few were deep enough to leave a scar; none of the cuts, according to Filip, were life-threatening.

The stitching wasn't absolutely perfect, but it saved Gabby a trip to the hospital, and Bobby the knowledge; both Filip and Unser had reluctantly agreed to keep it under wraps. When he was finished, he placed the needle down and cupped Gabby's face, forcing her to look at him. "Are ye alright?" he asked.

"I just killed someone, Filip. How do you think I am?"

His eyes searched her, as though he was looking for something in her. He must have found it, because he leaned forward, pressing his lips to her forehead and said, "ye'll be fine."

He was upset that she'd gone to Tig before him, but what could he do? She'd probably realised that he'd be pissed off. That he'd do something stupid. Of course she had, that's why she didn't call him. She didn't want everyone knowing what had happened, and knew Tig well enough to be certain he'd keep his mouth shut. Filip wouldn't say anything; it would do her no good. But he wasn't entirely sure about the cop. Sure, Unser was in Clay's pocket, which was enough to make him believe this would never reach the authorities and blow back on Gabby, but that didn't mean he wouldn't tell Clay.

Sighing, Filip helped Gabby to her feet. "Ye should get dressed; I'll go help those two idiots." He left her to find Unser and Tig wrapping up the body in a large, thick sheet of plastic.

"You know," Unser said, "I could get fired for this."

Tig scowled at him. "Fired? I'd be more worried about jail if I were you. Yeah, I bet the boys in there'd be real happy to have you as a cell mate."

"We need to get tha' window fixed up," Filip said.

Tig waved him off. "You just get Gabby out of here, man. Before somethin' else happens to her."

Filip snorted. Yes, she did seem to have an unnatural amount of bad luck. But this wasn't a matter of bad luck; this happened because they didn't pay Darby. And if they couldn't get to Gabby, they'd get to someone else. "Wha' are ye gunna do about Darby?"

"Ahh, we'll worry about that later."

Gabby walked out of the bathroom just then, her eyes red and puffy. She'd been crying again. "Wh... what will you do with him?"

Unser looked at her with what might have been pity, as Tig spoke. "Well, we'll get rid of him."

"_How_?"

Tig gave Filip a look. Nodding, Filip took Gabby by the shoulders. "Let's go, love; ye can't stay here." He guided her outside, to where his motorbike was.

"Where are we going?" Gabby asked, taking the helmet Filip held out for her.

She didn't care where they went, really. As long as she was far away from here, and with Filip, it didn't matter.

"My place," he answered, mounting his bike.

Gabby hopped on behind him, wrapping her arms tightly around his waist and resting her head on his back.

She was starting to feel the pain, as it crept up her arms and legs and torso, and her whole body felt weak. The scraping of his nails on her legs and his fingers on her skin lingered as Gabby tried to stay calm.

Why did these things always happen to her? She'd never been an exceptionally lucky person, but why should that mean she got all the bad luck in the world? Her parents; her siblings; Jeremy; now this. Sure, she had Filip, but he was on his way to jail, and she had no idea how long he'd be in there for. It was all messed up.

Gabby didn't notice as Filip pulled up at his house, nor did she pay much attention when he took her inside. It was only when he asked if she was hungry did she snap back to reality. "Did ye eat?"

Gabby's mind briefly flitted to her bedroom, where her lasagne was sitting on the bedside table, going cold.

"I'm not hungry just... just tired."

Filip sighed. He motioned for her to follow him. "Ye can sleep in my bed; I'll take the couch."

Before he could leave, Gabby caught him by the arm. "Stay? I don't want you to go."

She was terrified that if he left, someone else would attack her. Even if he _was _just in the living room. Even if they couldn't possibly know she was here. She didn't want to be alone, because every time she closed her eyes she saw the man's bloody body on the ground. But it wasn't the man anymore; it was Filip, or Bobby, or Tig. It was Lucy and her baby, or Jamie and Alisa. And it wasn't her; it was Jeremy, standing over them with a knife dripping blood.

Gabby let out a shaky breath, as Filip watched sadly. "I can stay."

* * *

Tig groaned as he struggled to pull the body out of the boot. Bastard weighed a tonne, and that was before Tig had wrapped him in a thousand layers of plastic. If that wasn't difficult enough, rigor mortis had set in; the body was stiffer than a plank of wood.

The body clunked and cracked as it hit the ground. Grabbing it by the legs, Tig dragged it further into the bush. He'd promised to make sure this was never traced back to Gabby, and that's exactly what he was going to do. He was going to dig a ditch, throw the body in there, set it on fire, and busy the whole goddamned thing. He'd doused it in bleach already; some of the blood on the body was likely to be Gabby's.

Unser had left not long after Filip and Gabby. He'd promised not to tell anyone, but he refused to help dispose of the body; didn't want it getting back to him. Tig got that, but it wasn't exactly like he wanted to be burying bodies in the middle of the night, either; there was a whore back at the clubhouse with _his _name on it.

When he was a considerable distance out of Charming, he dropped the body, and went back to collect a shovel and gasoline. It took him and hour to dig a deep enough ditch. He kicked the body in there, soaked it with gas, and set it alight.

Tig loved fire. Well, being as sadistic as he was, he liked anything that caused pain to another, but there was something about fire that was different to guns and knives and running people over in cars. When you pull the trigger of a gun, or brandish a knife, you can control where it goes; with fire, once you've lit it, you've got no control. Fire was its own being.

That's what he liked about it. And if you were careful enough, then it was an accident; a strike of lightning or badly placed heater.

The fire warmed Tig up as he thought; what were they going to do about Darby? If things kept going the way they were, it would get out of control. More people would die. Clay had already made it clear that they weren't paying the money, and Darby made it clear that he wanted the money. As soon as the others went to jail, it would all fall upon Tig to work this shit out.

A deal; that's what they'd have to come up with. Some sort of deal that kept the both of them happy. Allowing Darby into Charming was out of the question. Although, there was that sheet metal factory. It had been a big money-maker for Darby and while technically it _wasn't _a part of Charming, it was just inside the borders of the town. There was the motel just down the road from it where Darby's whores worked, but the loss of the factory had put a huge dent in his business.

_Maybe _he could negotiate with Clay to give it back to Darby. After all, the man who owned it lived out of town; classified it as part of Stockton. He simply got a tad ambitious when building it, and it crossed into Charming.

All he had to do was convince Clay and the others...


	24. Of Dreams and Perfection

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Dreams and Perfection

* * *

**A/N:** Thank you to all my lovely reviewers! I struggled a lot with this chapter, which is why it took longer to upload. The first part was easy; it's the last part that I had difficulties with... Anyhow, enjoy!

* * *

Gabby was standing on the edge of a cliff. She didn't know how she got there, or why, or even where it was. All she knew was that one moment she was in bed with Filip, and the next she was on the edge of a cliff.

The waves below crashed against the rocks with deafening booms as the black water was sucked out into the ocean, only to race back up to the side of the cliff again. There were rocks spread out through the water, and Gabby cringed at the thought of falling. If, by some miracle, she missed the rocks, she would surely drown.

But what was she doing here? Had someone kidnapped her in the night? No, they couldn't have. Filip was there. If they'd taken her then they would have taken him. Or they'd killed him. Her heart stopped. Did someone kill Filip, to get to her?

_No, we didn't kill him, _a voice told her. She whipped her head around, but there was no one there. It was just her; the voice was coming from inside her head. _You did._

Gabby shook her head, refusing to listen. "I didn't. I wouldn't."

_What about the man you killed?_

"That was different; he attacked _me. _I had no choice!"

She heard a low chuckle. _There's always a choice. It was either you, or him. How selfish that you would pick yourself. What makes you so special? He might have had a family. A wife. Children. _

"I have a family, too," Gabby sobbed.

_No you don't; your family's dead._

"I've got the club. I've got Filip."

_But Filip's dead. They all are. You pushed them off a cliff._

It was only then that Gabby realised; the rocks weren't rock at all. They were bodies. She could clearly see them now. Gemma, mom, dad. Jamie and Alisa. The boys. All of them floating belly up, their eyes wide and glassy, mouths hanging open. Amidst the throng she saw Jeremy and the man who had attacked her. She saw Lucy and Cole, hand-in-hand; Lucy's baby was laying on her stomach, squirming and bawling. There was Jocelyn and Charlie, her boss still thrashing around, fighting for his life. But Charlie couldn't swim.

Gabby watched as he succumbed to the waves, the black water washing over his head and swallowing him whole. _See? They're all dead._

"The baby's still alive," Gabby told the voice.

_So then go and save it._

But even with the absence of rocks, the water was still too treacherous. Gabby wasn't a superhero. She was flesh and bone, just like every other person. "I can't. I'll die."

A harsh laugh rang out through the air, and Gabby spun around to see Filip. It wasn't the warm, kind Filip that she knew; this Filip was cold, emotionless. His eyes were wide and wild, his mouth pulled into a twisted sneer. "It's either _you _or the babe, righ'? Ye won't sacrifice yer life to save a baby?"

"I..."

"No, ye wouldn't. But _I _will." He strode to the edge of the cliff, peering down into the depths. Rolling his shoulders back, he prepared to jump.

"You can't, Filip!" Gabby screamed. She seized his shoulders, pulling him back. "You'll die!"

Maybe it _was _selfish of her, but she couldn't lose him, not for anyone. He was all she had, all she wanted. If he died, what was she left with? How many times would _her _heart be broken in her lifetime?

"Psh. Aye, I guess I will. Well, someone's gotta save tha' baby, and it's either me, or _you_." He stared her down, waiting for her to make a decision.

"I... I don't want you to die, Filip. I can't lose you."

"Fair enough, then."

Before Gabby could say anything else, his lips smashed against hers. He grabbed her shoulders tightly as she wrapped her hands around his neck in response.

Then his lips were gone, and his strong arms were pushing her backwards. Gabby automatically tightened her hold around his neck. "Filip? _Filip!"_

She struggled against him, wrapping her leg around the back of his knee so it buckled, and pulling him to the ground with a yell, his weight crushing her as he landed on top of her. He tried to get up, but she held him down, so he tried a different tactic, landing punch after painful punch on her face.

Gabby screamed at him, releasing his neck to grab his face. She could feel the dipped flesh of his scars under her palms as she placed her thumbs over his eyes, jamming her nails into the inner corners.

With a bloodcurdling scream, Filip slammed her head against the ground. Her vision exploded into a flurry of white as a boot hit her in the side again and again until she heard a crack, and pain shot up her side.

As her vision came back, she saw Filip towering over her, still blindly booting her in the side. Reaching up a fist, she hit him with all her might in the crotch. It was the only place she knew that would be to her advantage.

The pain of it bought Filip to his knees, and blood mingled with tears ran down his cheeks, the gaping, bloody wounds in his eye-sockets making him look like some sort of twisted demon. Gabby took this opportunity to get to her feet, ignoring the pain in her side, or the warm liquid that was dripping down her face. Snarling and determined, he followed the sound she was making. He teetered on the edge of the cliff, still howling in rage.

It was the only chance she would get.

Gabby steeled herself. Rushing forward, she slammed her palms into his chest, catching him off-guard. Filip keeled over backwards, his feet slipping off the edge. His hands shot out, blindly trying to catch onto to something, anything, but all he managed to snatch were great handfuls of air.

As he plummeted towards the water, the voice said, _it was either you or him, right?_

Gabby watched as Filip's body hit the surface with the force of a bullet, sending a spray of water high into the air. It was only then she stopped to think.

What had she done? She'd just killed him. She'd killed _all _of them. Filip and her mom and dad. Jamie and Alisa. She'd killed everyone.

The baby was still there, still screaming. She watched it for a while, thinking. Did she really want to die for it? With everyone dead, who'd look after the thing? But... If she were to _live_ and save the baby, she could keep it. She may not get another chance. If she died, what did it matter anymore? Everyone else was dead. She may as well join them. That way, they could all be together.

With the two thoughts in mind, Gabby threw herself off the cliff.

* * *

Gabby woke suddenly, and with a gasp. She glanced around her. No cliff, no water, no bodies. With a sigh, she sat up, Filip's arm falling limply from her waist to her lap. He was snoring lightly, looking peaceful and strangely angelic, and he still had both eyes.

It had been a dream.

Gabby let out a breath of relief. It had seemed so vivid, so... _real_, that she was afraid maybe she _had _gouged out Filip's eyes. Or maybe she _had _killed him. She would never be able to forgive herself for that. This man's death was hard enough.

Despite her best efforts, Gabby found herself wondering if he'd had family. If someone had threatened to kill _his _family if he didn't kill her. And the attempted rape? Could Gabby be sure it had really happened? Everything had gone so fast, she hadn't had time to think. What if she'd imagined that, or imagined that he was trying to kill her, and she'd simply murdered him in cold blood? He might not have even attacked her. The wounds on her body were from her trying to bust out through the window. He'd dragged her back inside, but maybe it was because he was worried she'd hurt herself.

She tried to remember how it happened. She'd opened the door to him, and he'd dragged her into the spare bedroom. Or had she taken one look at him and panicked? She wasn't sure anymore. All she knew was that he was dead, and she'd been the one to kill him. Murder. It might not have even been a matter of 'you or him'. It could have been that _he _was the one trying to defend himself, while _she _went mental and attacked him. How did she explain that to the judge?

"Gabby?"

Filip had woken up, and was now watching her cautiously. The tiredness on his face aged him, and Gabby felt guilty; he'd been up half the night trying to comfort her, and probably hadn't fallen asleep until _after _she had.

"Wha' are ye doin' awake?" he asked, sitting up next to her.

Gabby fidgeted. She couldn't tell him she'd had a nightmare. Hell, Filip had killed plenty before, and he was still a fully functioning member of society. What would he think of her if she told him she was having nightmares about murdering everyone? Would he laugh, or think she was weak?

Like Tig, he'd insisted that she had done the right thing. But Gabby certainly didn't _feel _like she'd done the right thing. That man was _dead_, because of her. In a split second, she'd snuffed out a life. How was she supposed to live with that? "How do you do it?"

"Do wha'?"

"Anything," Gabby whispered. "Sleep, work, _live_. How do you do it knowing all the things you've done?"

Filip sighed. "I don't know, love." He hugged her to his chest, where she let out a sob.

"I can't do this, Filip."

"Aye, ye can. Ye'll be fine, alrigh'? I promise it. Jus' don' let yer guilt get the best o' ye."

Through her tears, Gabby could see the determined look on his face. She didn't know why, but it made her feel better, as though maybe he was right. Maybe she'd be just fine. Maybe she had done the right thing. She just had to forget about it, pretend like it hadn't happened; it was a delusion of her mind, just like she'd done with Jeremy's attack. Jeremy was an idiot, but he wasn't so violent that he'd potentially kill someone. Nightmares was all that they were. And the whole issue with the possible infertility; all part of her dreams.

But as she brushed her fingers over her abdomen, she felt the bump of a scar, running down a few inches, and the reality again crashed down on her. She withdrew her hand and rejected the thoughts.

"We should get some sleep," she said.

"Aye." Filip kissed her forehead. "We should."

* * *

"Look, I'm just sayin', we should make a deal with Darby, come to an arrangement," Tig insisted. "He gets his factory, and leaves us the hell alone."

As expected, his idea hadn't gone down too well with Clay, or any of the others, for that matter. He had Chibs in his corner, and that was it. The rest of the boys wanted nothing to do with it.

"I am not letting him into Charming," Clay said. "I ain't afraid to get a little blood on my hands."

Tig sighed. "You wanna keep up this war with Darby? Fine. But what happens when you lot are in jail? What, you think me, Ope and the prospect'll still be alive when you get out?"

Clay pulled out a cigar, unfazed, and took the time to light it. "If you're that scared of a bunch of neo-nazi pricks, then tap another charter."

"It's not us I'm worried about." Tig risked a sidewards glance at Chibs, but the Scotsman wasn't looking at him. They needed to tell the boys what had happened, make them understand that they _couldn't _go to war with Darby. But that would mean betraying Gabby's trust, and Tig wasn't sure he could live with that, even if she never did find out.

On top of that, Clay and the others finding out might just push them to start a full-blown war, and that wouldn't do any of them any good. Tig had already decided; when Clay and the others were in jail, he'd be calling the shots. He'd promise to patch in the prospect if the boy voted with him, and there was no way Opie would vote against him; kid hadn't got much of a voice yet. He hated to do it that way, make deals that Clay and the others had no say in, but if they voted no, it was the only way. As much as Tig loved his violence, he wasn't an idiot, and going to war with Darby now was idiocy.

"What are talkin' about?" Clay asked. He sat forward in his chair. "What happened?"

"Nothin' man, I'm just sayin'. We're gunna have three men tryin' to protect three old ladies, and keep a business runnin'. You want a war on top of that?"

Jax scoffed. "Darby's smarter than that; he's not gunna attack our _women_."

Tig couldn't help it. He couldn't stop the sarcastic bark that escaped his lips. And even if he could, none of them to ignore the cold, hard look that Chibs gave Jax, as though the boy had suggested they kill the women themselves.

Clay looked from one man to the other. "Someone better start tellin' me what happened."

"Chibs'll tell you, man."

But Chibs was shaking his head. "Oh, no no no. _I _made a promise, and I'm stickin' to et. _You _tell 'em."

"Hey, I made that same promise, okay? You were there, too, so maybe..."

"The only reason _I _was there, was because yer too useless to go to a hospital!"

"That shit would have been on record, kinda defeats the whole secrecy thing, doesn't it!"

"Ye could've paid cash!"

"Okay, I'll admit, I didn't think of that, but it's not the point."

The rest of the boys watched the two as they argued, heads shifting from one to the other like they were watching a tennis game. Clay massaged his forehead with the tips of his fingers.

"Okay, okay, _enough_!" he roared. The two stopped arguing immediately. "Any thoughts on Tig's idea?"

"He might be right," Jax said. "For now at least. The factory isn't a part of Charming. We give it to Darby, in exchange he leaves us alone. We can figure out where to go from there when we get out."

"We need to send a message," Opie pointed out.

"The last message we tried to send is about to throw us all in jail. If we start a war we'll be going into prison unprotected," Bobby told the boy. He stretched, folding his hands behind his head. "I don't know about you lot, but when I die, I'd like to be on the outside."

Happy snorted. "We should find Darby, and cut his balls off. That'll send him a message." Everyone looked at him. "I'll do it," he offered.

"Let's vote on it. All in favour?"

Almost everyone's hand went up, but Clay's wasn't one of them. He huffed. "Let's go negotiate with Darby."

The mallet hit the table with a crack.


	25. Of Insomnia and Blushes

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Insomnia and Blushes

* * *

**A/N: **Hi guys! Miss me? I know, I know. I really had a lot of trouble with this chapter. It's got a fair bit of... Well, what you've all been waiting for (if you know what I mean), and I'm not really the biggest expert in it; plus I get embarrassed about it...

Anyhow, thank you to all of my wonderful reviewers and all my fans. This story is definitely near its end. I estimate 1, maybe 2, very possibly (but unlikely) 3 chapter left, which is already more than I said, but you know... So, I hope you all enjoy, let me know with a review ;)

* * *

During the days following the man's death, Gabby was a mess. Every waking moment filled her with the incomprehensible fear that Darby or the police would roll up on her and take her away, either to prison or to her own grave. The rare moments she did sleep, that same dream plagued her, so much so that she spent countless hours pouring over old books, trying to find out if the cliff she pushed Filip off every other night was real or imagined. Her schoolwork was suffering, to the point where Bobby suggested she drop out, and her relationships were all hanging by threads.

Tig and Filip, obviously, knew why she was so nervous and jumpy, but the others had no idea. How was Juice to know that when he put a hand on her shoulder to get her attention she would scream obscenities and threats at him until Filip dragged her into a corner to calm her down? She'd gone and apologized to him later on, but since then had been keeping his distance. It was a shame, because Gabby rather liked him.

She'd gotten even with Gemma, ripping the woman's head open for what she'd done. It was the shock of Gabby's outburst that was now keeping Gemma away, and perhaps a hint of guilt; she'd apologised, explained how she was worried Gabby would leave them and not return. A silly worry, she'd admitted, considering Gabby wouldn't just leave, not now that she had Filip.

After the two outbursts, the rest of the club unconsciously avoided her. Even poor Bobby was beside himself.

It was just, she couldn't help reliving that moment. Every time she walked into Bobby's house she saw his motionless body, the floor slippery with blood. She remembered how he dragged her into the spare bedroom, how his eyes had had a malicious glint in them as he told her what he would do. It had been her who'd killed him, discovered that, like her, he was just a fleshy bag of bone and meat and blood. They weren't all that much different, he and her. And how easily had he died? How easily could any of them die? All it took was a bullet, a knife, an accident. All that needed to be on the other end of that bullet or gun was someone who thought their life was worth more.

Was Gabby's life worth more than that man's? When had she become so important? Even though Filip and Tig insisted she was worth more than that man, did Darby? What was he going to do to her, now that she had killed one of his men? Tig had assured her that the club had come to an agreement with Darby, but that didn't lessen her fear of him.

When Gabby mentioned this to Filip, he just shook his head seriously, and told her she was safe.

"He migh' be crazy, but 'e's not stupid. We came to an agreement, and he'll honour that unless 'e wants to die," he told her, puffing on a smoke. He wasn't nearly as concerned as Gabby thought he should be but, she figured, he was probably used to it by now. "Ye're gunna get past this shite, alrigh'?"

"With Tig's help?" Gabby questioned, raising an eyebrow. Tig was going the wrong way about trying to help her, from offering to buy her a gun (just in case), to assuring her it gets easier after the first time. He meant well, she knew, but directions on the best place to shoot a man wasn't really helping her.

"Aye, ye've got a point, there. But with the rest o' us locked up, it's either him or Unser."

Neither option appealed to her. "I'll come visit," she promised.

Something flashed in Filip's eyes. "Ye bloody well will not! I don't want ye goin' anywhere near that place, ye got it? It's no place fer a girl!"

Gabby persisted. "I don't care. I said I'll visit and I will," she firmly stated, leaving no room for debate.

With a heavy sigh, Filip shook his head and fished around in his fridge for a beer. He ripped the top off it, tossing the metal lid in the bin, and slumped back down in his armchair.

Bobby had agreed to let Gabby stay at Filip's for a few days, partially because at the end of her stay was the trial – none of them had high hopes for it – and partially because Bobby just didn't know what else to do with her.

"How long do you think you'll get?" Gabby asked, hugging her knees to her chest.

She'd been tossing and turning whether or not to ask for a while now, but it was something she wanted to know.

Filip didn't answer right away. He continued sipping his beer and puffing on his smoke as though Gabby hadn't spoke, but she could see the slight change in his composure, and the way his eyebrows dipped. "Two... maybe three years," he finally said.

It wasn't what Gabby had been expecting. She choked on her words as she comprehended that amount of time. Two years was long enough, but three? By the time he got out she'd almost be at the legal drinking age. Of course, that was the least of her problems; three years before they could go out and just have dinner or sleep next to each other. Three years before he would make her another cup of Irish tea; she could make her own tea, but it was never as good. Nothing she made tasted as nice as when Filip made it. Three years. She'd thought one was bad enough.

It was at that moment Gabby remembered what she'd been meaning to do before the attack. What she'd been meaning to do for a long while. It was definitely still something she wanted, but would Filip be up for it?

With an expel of breath, she approached him, placing a leg on either side of his to straddle him as she tugged the beer out of his hands and placed it on the coffee table. Filip didn't object, so she leaned into him, pressing their lips together. Gabby could feel his soft breath, taste the nicotine and beer as she deepened the kiss. She seized fistfuls of his shirt as his hands travelled her back.

Pressing her body into his, she broke away from his lips, letting their eyes meet. "Just this once," she begged.

Filip closed his eyes, letting out a half-sigh, half-moan. "Gabby, I don' want to have this conversation again."

"Then don't. I don't want to wait three more years. Do you?"

She saw a faint smile flit across his face, then it was gone. "I don' expect you to be here when I get out."

"And _I _don't want to have _this _conversation again, Filip Telford. Whether you like it or not, I'm going to be here when you get out. Why can't you just accept that?"

Gabby's eyes were moist with tears. She was sick of telling him she wasn't going to leave, just because he was ten years older than her. She was sick of him telling her to find a better life. She was sick of guns and jail and... and _Gemma_. She was sick of waking up in the middle of the night, bawling and needed to check that Filip and everyone were still alive. She was sick of nothing going her way.

It was a surprise to her, then, when Filip's lips crashed against hers', and his hands fell to her ass, grabbing the covered flesh as he lifted her. With a shriek, Gabby hooked her arms around his neck. "Just like that?" she managed.

"Aye," he said. "Jus' like tha'."

He dumped her on the bed and straddled her as he tore his shirt off. Gabby's eyes travelled his bare chest with a mixture of awe and nerves. She memorised every tattoo and scar; the dips of his abs and even the exact shape of his navel as she remembered she wouldn't see any of it for another couple of years.

Filip grabbed the hem of her shirt, pulling it over her head, before leaning in to kiss her deeply, his hands making short work of her jeans. He caught her bottom lip, sucking on it, then moved down her jaw-line to pick a spot on her neck. His hand slipped under her knickers, and Gabby let out a gasp of surprise when he started rubbing her in small circles, sending shocks of electricity through her body.

With heavy, laboured breathing, Gabby reached for Filip's trouser's, unbuttoning them and pulling the zipper down with difficulty. The heat pooling in her groin was distracting, and her nerves were growing, thoughts running through her head.

Did it hurt? How long would it take? How long was it _supposed _to take? What was she supposed to do? What if she was so bad at it that Filip never wanted to speak to her again? Or maybe he'd think that there was something wrong with her... bits. _Was _there something wrong with them? Gabby had never wondered what female genitalia was supposed to look like before. Then a single, conflicting thought ran through her mind; what if I get pregnant? Surely Filip would be prepared for that, though. He wasn't stupid. But the thought of asking sent blood rushing to her cheeks.

Filip noticed. "Wha' is it?"

"I..." she trailed off, her blush deepening. "Do you have... um, _condoms_?" She breathed the last word, unsure if Filip had even heard it.

But he just chuckled, reached over to his bedside table, and pulled out a small, square package. "Ye're sure abou' this?" he asked.

Gabby nodded, determined, as she tangled her fingers in his hair, pulling him into a firm kiss. With her heart pounding, she unhooked her bra, slipping out of it, and tossed it off the bed, baring all. Filip's eyes flickered from her lips to her breasts, torn. He finally settled on her breasts, taking the left in his mouth, sucking and licking and nipping as he kicked his trousers off.

When they were both free of clothing and Filip had expertly rolled on his condom – Gabby was both too embarrassed and scared to – she pulled him up. "Does... does it hurt?" she whispered. She'd heard tell that the first time was slightly painful.

"Erm..." Filip blinked. "Well... I'm no' a girl," he told her. "If ye don' want to, jus' tell me."

"I want to."

Placing a light kiss on her forehead, Filip pushed into her. Any pain that Gabby felt was forgotten as she lost herself in ecstasy. She hooked her arms under his, nails digging into his shoulders as he kissed every inch of skin he could find.

It was slow at first, Filip making sure she wasn't hurting or hadn't changed her mind, but he soon picked up the pace, burying himself inside her again and again, his breathing getting heavier the closer he got.

Curling fists in his hair, Gabby pulled Filip's face to hers and their lips meshed together as she reached her peak. Her hips jerked as she climaxed, moaning into his mouth. With a final thrust, Filip came after her. He rested his weight on top of her, panting, before rolling off.

He knotted the condom and tossed it in the waste-paper basket, then fell back onto the pillows, pulling a breathless Gabby to him. "Reckon I still got it," he joked as Gabby threw an arm around his waist.

She shrugged. "It was alright, I guess."

He looked down at her. "Is tha' wha' ye think?"

Gabby smiled shyly, reaching her hand up to trace the scar on his cheek. Filip's large hand enclosed over hers, pulling it away from his face. "We should get some sleep, love."

Gabby nodded. "I love you, Filip."

"Aye; I love ye, too."


	26. Of Endings and Beginnings

The Heart of a Broken Soul

Of Endings and Beginnings

* * *

**A/N: **This is it. The end. The final chapter. The end of the beginning. If you're sad to see this story end, take comfort in the fact that I am sadder. I'll miss all of you wonderful readers, more than you'll know.

Of course, it's not the end. Not really. In other words, the Filip/Gabby universe is not over yet! I don't know when I'll write it, or what's going to happen in it (seriously, I don't) but a sequel will happen. It's title... I don't know that, either. Stay tuned.

So, thank you to each and every one of you for your ongoing support and loyalty. I'm glad and happy to have so many people enjoying my story. Hopefully this chapter does my story justice, and I only hope you'll stick around for the encore ;)

* * *

Gabby woke on the trial day to a nightmare full of blood and death. Two strong arms gripped her body tightly, and she could feel Filip's steady breath in her hair. This, she thought, was perfection. Waking up every morning to the one person who you'd want to see at that hour, the one person who might know you better than you do. If only she could do this every morning, she knew she'd get past all the death, all the pain.

But that wasn't going to happen. The trial was in a couple of hours, and with the result would go years of waking up in Filip's arms, with his body pressed against hers. No more discussions about the brilliance (or not brilliance) of Shakespeare. No more of Filip's Irish tea. Not for a few years, at least.

Gabby had already gone through it in her head. How many times had she gone into the courtroom, pleading to the judge to have mercy? They had done it for her, she would tell the judge. It wasn't their fault. How many times had the judge had mercy? They'd all walked out of there, free as they had been a few hours before. How many times? She had even considered them running, or acquiring new identities. Or that maybe the judge would say the trial was a waste of time and let them go. Everything and anything. Gabby had considered it all.

It was stupid, of course. They were felons – all of them – and they'd been caught with guns. What did they expect would happen? What did Gabby expect? She knew how unfair the law could be. A group of felons were caught with guns, and it was off to jail with them. But two parents were brutally murdered, and three children left orphaned? Well, it was probably a robbery gone wrong. No fingerprints, no witnesses, and nothing they could do. What of justice?

With a sigh, Gabby manoeuvred in Filip's arms so she was facing him. His brown eyes were already watching her. "You're awake," Gabby stated.

"Aye." He inspected her with scrutiny, as though he was searching for a particular freckle that was the shape of an apple.

"How long have you been awake?"

Filip shrugged. "I barely slept," he admitted, running a thumb along her cheek.

Slowly and deliberately, Gabby bought her lips to his, kissing him softly. She bought her hands to his face, feeling the prickle of his beard, the dip of his scars and the fullness of his cheeks before running her fingers through his hair. Filip deepened the kiss, rolling so that he was on top of her. His lips were desperate and passionate, as his fingers tore at her shirt.

After the first time, Filip had taken on a 'well, we've done it once, so we may as well keep doing it' view on sex.

He made short work of their clothes, barely even breaking the kiss as his hands travelled up and down her body, touching every inch of her, committing her to memory before thrusting into her.

Gabby moaned in pleasure as Filip moved within her, rough and gentle, passionate and lustful. Each breath was heavier as Filip moved closer to his climax. Gabby met him thrust for thrust. This would be the last time they made love for however many years; she was going to make sure it was the best.

Putting her hands on his shoulders, she gripped one and pushed on the other. It took Filip's cloudy mind a moment to figure out what she wanted, but as he did, he grabbed her waist, flipping the both of them around so she was on top.

Having never been on top, Gabby was both nervous but determined as she held his shoulders tightly, and began to roll her hips slowly. Filip swore and said something in Gaelic as his short nails dug into her flesh, guiding her. Gabby began to move faster, pushing both of them to the edge.

Sliding a hand up her back, Filip pulled her into a kiss. Their lips meshed together as, with a final thrust, Gabby reached her climax, and Filip just after her. She collapsed heavily on him, panting heavily.

"Christ," Filip panted, "I'm gunna miss ye."

A small sob escaped Gabby's lips as a few tears fell down her cheeks. She pressed her lips lightly to Filip's. "I'll miss you, too."

* * *

Curled up in the armchair like a cat, Gabby watched curiously as Filip traversed from one end of the house to the other, muttering to himself in three different languages. Every now and then he would glance at Gabby and blink, as though wondering what she was doing there, before continuing his purge.

He'd gone through the house a few times, making sure everything was turned off at the powerpoint. He checked the top shelf of the fridge, carefully examining the best before of each item before wandering off to the bedroom. A few minutes later, he returned to check the second shelf, then wandered off again.

When both the fridge and freezer had been fully inspected, Filip sighed, lit up a smoke and leaned against the counter. "Make sure ye don' waste any of it," he said.

Gabby nodded. She knew how much Filip hated it when food was wasted; whenever they went out for tea, he always ate everything on his plate. And Gabby's, if she couldn't eat it all. It was something he'd got from his mother, apparently.

"Alrigh'?" he pressed when Gabby didn't answer.

"Okay. I'll cook something up for Tig and Opie."

Filip nodded. "Get Gemma to help ye. Do a dinner, or somethin'."

At Gemma's name, Gabby's eyes narrowed dangerously. She would _not _ask that woman for anything. Not after what she'd done.

As much as she hated to admit it, Gabby understood _why _Gemma had kept that information from her; she was worried that Gabby would leave them. To be honest, if the opportunity had arose before Filip, Gabby would have taken it. She'd have left Charming and everyone in it, gone to New York and stayed there. But not now. Ever since Filip had been in her life – since he'd _really _been a part of it – not once had Gabby thought of leaving. For a holiday, maybe, but not forever.

So, even though Gabby understood Gemma's reasons, she still felt a burning hate inside her every time the woman was mentioned. There had been a ticket, _for her_, to visit her brother and sister. But then Gemma had stuck her nose in, because Gemma just _had _to have her nose in everything.

"Hey, ye have to forgive her eventually," Filip stated matter-of-factly.

Gabby stared evenly at him. "No, I don't."

"Yes, ye do. Like it or not, between Tig, Ope and the prospect, she's the only one ye've got." With a final puff, Filip stubbed out his cigarette and disappeared into the bedroom again.

Gabby sullenly watched him go. She didn't like it, not one bit. Gemma wasn't much good when it came to supporting others, because she had a nasty habit of using it against you later in life; Tig would go the wrong way about it; she didn't know Opie too well; and Juice... well the poor kid had enough of his own problems. He'd been the club's prospect for almost two years now. Clay wasn't too keen on patching him in, but didn't want to get rid of him because he was good with technology. And she couldn't exactly go to Lucy; she was dealing with the pregnancy, on top of Cole's abandonment – he split the moment she told him she was keeping it.

Filip returned while Gabby was pondering this. She looked up to see him holding a small revolver. For about a second, Gabby thought he was going to shoot her. When he spun it in his hand and held the handle out to her, she realised how stupid the thought was.

"Take it."

With shaky hands, Gabby gripped the gun. It was small, light, with a smooth mahogany coloured grip, and black barrel. She couldn't deny it was a beautiful gun, but it terrified her. Here, in her hand, was the power to take a life. Hell, she could point it at Filip, or herself, pull the trigger, and there goes a life. That's how easy it was. She let out a ragged breath, holding it at arm's length. "I don't want this, Filip."

"Ye need it."

She held it out for him, shaking her head. "The last time I was near one of these, I killed someone!"

"Aye, and it could have just as easily have been you!"

Adamant, Gabby placed the gun on the coffee table, stepping away from it. "I don't want it."

"Tig can show ye how to use it properly, make sure ye don't shoot anyone ye're not supposed to," Filip went on, ignoring her.

"You're not listening to me, are you?"

Filip's eyes bored into hers. "No" he told her. "Because ye need to be able to protect yerself."

"From what?" Gabby asked. "Huh? You sorted all that stuff out with Darby so you wouldn't have to worry about him while you're in jail, he's not exactly going to rain down on us once you're in." With every word, she was less sure. Darby wasn't stupid. If he went back on his promise, Samcro would crush him when they were released.

But... how many would die in the meantime? Three reapers against Darby's crew. If he did it smart and quiet, they could all be dead before they got a chance to call in another charter. He could have Charming before anyone knew what was going on.

Darby had already tried to kill her once. She survived because she got lucky, and Gabby wasn't exactly known for being lucky.

"Darby isn't exactly the most trustworthy guy. Take it, and pray ye don't need it."

* * *

Filip hated trials. Not because at the end of them you were usually thrown into jail. Not because most of the people in the room sat there staring at you like you were the devil reincarnated, and the rest looked down on you with enough pity to make you sick. No, it was because they were so boring, so monotonous. You got in there and were accused, in detail, of doing something. Then it was a tennis game, back and forth between the two sides. "Your client did this." "No, he didn't." "Well, here's our proof." "Well, _yes_, he did do that, _but_..." Filip didn't care about that. He didn't want to sit through all that 'yes, but' shit. Just give him the goddamned sentence and be done with it.

He scanned the room. Tig, Ope and Juice were there, along with a few crow-eaters. Gemma was supposed to be coming. Gabby wasn't here. She was still at Filip's.

She'd been close to tears when they'd left. Bobby had visited, given her a hug, and asked if she'd look after his house. Gabby assured him she would, and the two of them had left her standing there, her eyes moist with unshed tears. It made Filip feel sick. Sick with fear, sick with worry, sick with longing. Sick with the thought that – despite all she said – she might not be there when he got out.

Sure, she might be certain that she loves him now, but what about when she runs into a boy her age? A charming young boy who knows when to laugh and all the right places to touch her. A boy with a future that doesn't involve jail and blood, who can give her all the things she wants and more. What happened then?

Filip didn't want to think about it. He could just add it to the list of reasons why he felt a growing nausea in his gut. Instead, he leaned back in his chair, watching the trial unfold.

It wasn't looking too bad for them. The way it was headed, they'd probably only get jail for having the guns. And, if that was the case, Jax would walk free; he wasn't a felon, still had his rights to possess a firearm. All in all, it was looking pretty good.

After the information was given, the judge looked over his notes. He frowned at them, sighed, and then turned to Filip and the boys. "You boys were aware of your restrictions when it came to possessing firearms, yet you chose to ignore them. I cannot sentence you for possessing a loaded firearm in public, but I can happily charge you for possessing firearms and breaking your restrictions. Jax Teller, you have been convicted of no previous felonies; you're free to go. As for the rest of you, I sentence you to two years and five months in Stockton State Prison." The mallet hit the bench with a _thunk_.

Filip scratched his head. "Well," he said, turning to Bobby. "That went better than expected."

* * *

She'd been sitting there for hours now, staring into space. The tears had stopped a while ago, but that was probably more due to a lack of moisture than anything else.

Gabby glanced at the clock. The trial would be over by now. It would have been over ages ago. How long had the boys got? Why hadn't anyone found her? Did something happen to Tig and the others? Or could they just not be bothered with her? She hadn't gone to the trial, after all. She was going to, but something stopped her at the door, as though someone was pulling her back into the house, refusing to let her go. It had been fear. Fear that, if she went, everything would be worse. It was a stupid thought, she knew, but nothing good seemed to happen when she was around.

The time passed slowly, and it was another hour before Gabby heard the sounds of a car pulling up. Her gaze slid to the front door. It opened moments later, and Gemma's head poked in. She spotted Gabby, and smiled.

Gabby didn't return the smile.

"You missed the trial," Gemma said, closing the door. She moved into the lounge and sat across from Gabby.

"I'm aware."

Gemma shrugged. "I didn't go, either. Can't stand trials. The judges, sitting there dishing out punishment, like they know best. I hate it. Tig told me how it went, though. Couldn't find you. I told him I'd let you know, so here I am."

Gabby didn't answer, but she was listening closely now. How long had they gotten? When could she see Filip? Did they have visiting rights? Telephone calls?

"You know, I've been thinking about... when we last spoke," Gemma began.

When they last spoke? Did she mean when Gabby stormed in and screamed at her until her voice went hoarse? It didn't matter; she was changing the subject. "Well? What about the boys?" Gabby cut in.

"They're fine."

"Don't tell me that! When are they getting out?"

If Gabby's sudden outburst startled Gemma, the woman didn't show it. "The judge gave them two years, five months."

Gabby sighed in relief. It was only seven months shy of three, or more, but it was still alright. How old would she be? Twenty-one. No, she'd be going on twenty-one. No. She _would _be twenty-one.

"You're not listening to me, baby."

"When can I visit him? They got visiting rights, didn't they? I mean, a gun charge isn't so bad, so they wouldn't take visiting rights from them." Gabby's mind was reeling. If she was twenty-one, Filip would be... thirty? Twenty-nine? Thirty-one? How many years older than her was he? Ah, it didn't matter.

"Gabby; I want to talk about New York."

Everything that Gabby had been thinking about froze. She glared up at the woman. "I don't. You've already done enough, Gemma. Thanks for the news," she added.

It was obviously that Gabby wanted Gemma to leave, but the older woman wouldn't be put off so easily. "No, I don't think I have done enough. I know I shouldn't have done what I did; I'm sorry for that. So... well, here." She held out an envelope.

Suspicious, Gabby leant forward, snatching it out of Gemma's hand. She carefully opened it, and pulled out a rectangle of paper. It took a moment for her to realise what it was. "This..."

Gemma shrugged. "I spoke with your aunt. She's okay with it. Just... promise me one thing."

Gabby finally tore her eyes of the bold letters to look at Gemma. "What's that?"

"Promise me you'll come back."

Glancing back down at the the piece of paper, she read the words again and again. 'New York'. Return ticket. It didn't cross Gabby's mind to get on the plane and not return. Not for a moment. She thought of Filip. Of Bobby and Piney and Tig. A memory sprung to mind, of a dinner they'd had not long after Gabby got out of hospital. They'd talked and laughed and thrown food. Gemma had bought out a pavlova topped with a doll, causing Tig to fall back and break his chair.

It was a happy memory, one that Gabby wasn't ready to let go of. Maybe it had taken her a while to realise, or maybe she knew all along, but didn't want to see it. The reason Gabby wouldn't just up and leave Charming wasn't _just _because of Filip. It was because of Samcro. It was because Tig always said the wrong thing, and Piney always knew when to say the right thing. It was because Bobby sucked at cooking, but he still tried, and because Jax would tease her mercilessly and Juice was always so polite. It was because she loved Filip so much it hurt, so much that she'd give anything to be in jail instead of him. It was because of all of them that the words slipped past Gabby's lips, sure and firm.

"I promise."


End file.
